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I dont like people staring at me.
Okay so sometimes I do like attention. (Example: If I dyed my hair a new color) but once people get close to me or try to.. It scares me.
I can't look at them. I can't even look at people in their eyes. I can only do that with one person and that's my really close friend of almost 2 school years.
because with her, I don't think she's judging me. it's hard to explain. i don't really care what people think. but i don't like people getting up close and reading my eyes. it makes me think they can read me and see emotion.
it just bothers me.
how can i get over it?
i've noticed that i avoid eye contact and sometimes i look up for a mere second .. then i get scared and look down.
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I totally understand what you mean! A lot of people are intimidated by close contact. Eye contact, especially, is something that you have to practice and will feel uncomfortable at first, but once you've gotten into the habit, it will feel totally natural and you won't even notice you're doing it.
Try this. Next time you're talking to your teacher or someone you're not good friends with, count in your head how long you're able to maintain eye contact with them. Or put a stop watch in your pocket maybe and do it that way. Each time, see if you can beat your record by 5 seconds. Don't stare them down (ha), but you can nod your head a little bit, move your hands, smile, etc. so it still feels like you're having a regular conversation.
Good eye contact is an excellent skill to have, especially for the business world, so definitly try to make a habit of it!
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Think of it this way, how do the other people feel when you don't look at them. Your eyes are one of the most expressive features you have. You can tell someone is listening to you when you give them contact. You may not be shy, but looking down while talking to someone is certainly giving off that impression.
I had a bit of trouble with that too. But I was shy. I kind of thought of it as a contest. Who will be the first person to look down? And it gradually progressed. And now I enjoy looking at people while I speak to them.
Maybe having a focal point could help too. For instance, try to look at see what their eye color is.
Or you can tell yourself "Okay, I'll look at this person in the eyes for one sentence" and start doing it gradually.
I think it become more of habit. You just got to keep trying, and at times maybe even force yourself. It really is important to look at people when you talk to them.
Good luck!
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