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Self Esteem, Crushes, Friends, Organization, Sports, and Sho
Really had no idea where to put this topic.
and thanks ALOT for reading + replying to this!
I try to be more outgoing and junk.. but like, it doesnt work! I just get more like shy and nervous. sometimes its even nervewracking to just get out of my seat and hand in my test, so i sit there all period looking retarded so i dont have to get up. i mean, its sometimes, when im not in a good mood. its not like i dislike myself or anything.. but i dunno. i seem to get like anxious and when people are nice to me and im not in the mood, though i want to be, i cant like have fun because i feel lazy or like i cant do it or like im embarrassed. im usually not like this but it gets triggered when im in school. maybe its because i dont like my current state and im always saying about things i can improve in the future, like my clothes, and getting more friends, getting better grades.. things like that. i say this like everyday and im even saying it now for tomorrow. but.. then it doesnt really work. i have OK days which can be better and sometimes i be myself then sometimes feel embarrased or whatever over like little things. theres even some kid i like who i dont think will really like me back since he hasnt really seen the real me.. I mean, he's nice to me and all, but I dont want him to think im boring. or any other guys and people. people have been nice to me and stuff, then after a while its like they havent been talking to me and stuff, maybe because i cant catch up or im not as fun? i guess it has to do with my mood.. or i have no idea. im usually fun and stuff, but like.. after school i crash and this enormous headache seems to go away and i just let myself loose and sing and be more outgoing. especially with my neighborhood friends, whom i've known for ever. in school.. like i always say that the next day will be great then in school im counting the minutes on the clock for the next class to come. i dont want to waste my childhood by feeling uncomfortable and such. i dont even say my problems.. only on this site whom i've grow to trust, but.. alot of my problems i keep to myself. i dont even write in diaries because i always fear or someone reading them. i cant really explain it.. i mean, i can be open but not about really really personal things like some of the things i am saying, or some feelings i've felt (not crushes. but even those i say if im good friends with the person). i hope one day it just wont explode.. which is why i love to do sports because its like an outlet. sorry its so dramatic.. but my head is just going crazy. maybe its because of puberty. i have no idea!! it sucks!! i dont know if its because im not confident. i've always thought myself to being that way but maybe im not. maybe im just selfconcious and whatever. i like the way i look.. though i know some things that can be improved like i can pluck my eyebrows, shave my legs, stuff like that. maybe i should be asking.. how do i like my current state? there will always be chances that i can improve myself in the future but how can i get comfy with the way i am now and love myself the way i am now? also.. how do i become more organized? i always hand stuff in late because im always frazzled and wasting time doing nothing on the computer (like im doing now) then sleeping really late.. and sometimes like getting no sleep at all then heading towards school without properly doing homework or studying for tests. dont get me wrong, im a bright student and people know i am very smart. but my mom wont let me join things i like like cheerleading, lacrosse, gymnastics, dance, travel soccer.. well i dont get alot of those special things.. because for one thing.. my family isnt all that rich now (my dad is setting a new company which will be huge, and my moms the only one working.. shes a nurse.) maybe in the winter i can shovel snow with my buds? if thats a good idea.. im also grateful for other suggestions. ack.. why am i so disorganized? how can i fix this? how can i like myself fully now? sorry this is soo long.. but like, thank you very much if you can help because it will really help me a whole lot, in a life changing way, hopefully. again, thank you!!
also, im 13 years old, and a seventh grader. (a girl.. if you havent realized yet.)
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Maybe give some free advice about: Health?
I definatly know what you are feeling right now, and I still remember having the same problems when I was in 7th grade(I'm in 8th now). I praticly didn't speak to anyone that year, whether it was on the bus, at school or even afterschool when almost nobody is around. Heck, I would skip lunch to go the liberary just so I could stop feeling stupid around everybody else!
I know this may sound really stupid, but have you ever tried meditation? I found that it really helps calm me down whenever I am feeling a bit frazzeled. Even in school, while you have finished everything and are just sitting there, just take a breath or two and close your eyes. For a second you might feel a bit wierd, like everybody is looking at you, but you have to remember that everyone thinks that everyone else thinks and notices more about them than everybody else in the room. They won't notice anything wierd and you'll feel a whole lot better to.
As for the guy, make sure to talk to him a lot, but not so much that he gets the impression that you're like, stalking him or something. Find out what he likes so you can develop similar likes and dislikes.That way, you two can become friends and possibly even more.
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wow me to i dont sleep, i eat a little and i am really disorginized. set goals, i cant go to sleep at night cause i dont know why. So i try to go to sleep at like 1 am. i wnet to a study skills class last summer and that helped alot. I started a study group with my friend aaron, all this helped me socialy to! i can talk to ppl easier and can communicate. just try it
hope it helped
nathan
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Coming from someone who has gone through something very similar as a teen I hope my answer will help you in anyway possible. I know what it's like to be uncomfortable in school but then be outgoing in my neighborhood. You repeat many times in this message that your happy with yourself and you like the way you look. But, it doesn't sound that way. It almost sounds as if your self-conscious and concerned about how others are going to perceive you which explains your quietness in school. Really the only way to even coming close to fixing this or even slightly altering your lifestyle in school is learning to accept yourself. You have to understand that no matter how you dress, act, do your make up, play sports, what "clique" your in, etc. that your who you are and that person is amazing. I know that may sound corny but everyone is special in their own way and it's just a matter of accepting how special you are. Everyone is different and that's what makes people unique. And STOP making plans for yourself such as "Tomorrow I'm going to do this to be better" because in all honesty worrying about things such as changing yourself is what's going to cause your anxiety and unhappiness. Stop worrying about what your going to change about yourself in the future days and just be yourself and if people can't accept you for who you are then they weren't meant to be your friend in the first place. It may seem like life is a popularity contest now but it won't be later in life. You will end up only having a couple of close friends that truly mean the world to you. The rest are really defined as "acquaintances". As for becoming more organized..I suggest starting things immediately. The computer is really distracting so I would do your homework or any assignment for that matter before you sit down and get comfortable. Once you sit down and start surfing the web, talking to friends, reading e-mails, watching TV, etc. you won't want to get back up again and you'll just end up putting off work more and more. I hope this helped and just remember any of what may seem like your "flaws" aren't really flaws at all. Those so called "flaws" is what makes you an individual..which is something everyone posesses. Also, if you ever need to talk or just want someone to listen, feel free to message me.
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