Member Since: December 10, 2006
Answers: 6
Last Update: December 12, 2006
Visitors: 1601
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Does anyone have any tips on how to stop cutting? (link)
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Cutting is hard to stop once you start since cutting is a natural endorphin releaser. Which explains why cutting makes you feel better. It naturally relaxes you. It's almost like a drug addiction and you get used to turning to it when your sad/angry. My advice to you is just to come to terms with the fact that there are other ways (and healthier ways) to make yourself feel better. One way is working out...just go for a walk or a jog to clear your mind. Really you just have to do something to take your mind off of what is bothering you at that time. Listening to music helps or even just watching TV. Do something that calms you down..and since everyone is different I can't really suggest one certain thing but try one of the things I listed. Hope this helped.
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i had a normal family, untill a few years ago when my sister started to completly disregard my parents, and just absorbed herself into her friends. her friends have had a bad influence on her. bother of them are dadless and they are causing my sister to disregard anything my dad says. the other day it got so out of hand my dad hit my sister. it was 100% justified i think. she went beserk and called social services, told every official she could and blew it out of proportion. now she is making up stories of other abuse's that didnt occur, including sexual abuse which never happen! her friends are drving her to do this, and she now (starting the other day)at my aunts. i dont wanna lose my family but my sister already took this to the next level
now we need to go to cout, and no one believes our side of the story, they just buy all the garbage shit my sister spews at them!
what can i do to get people to see the truth, my sister is lying and she is just trying to leave asap, (no one will believe this story at least not the truth...probally, but still any advice?) (link)
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I'm sorry to hear that such bad things regarding your home life. I'm also sorry to hear that your sister is giving into the peer pressure of others. You didn't mention your sisters age in here but I'm going to guess she's under the age of 18 since it sounds like she has some maturing to do. Most kids/teens under the age of 17/18 are wreckless and rebellious and don't normally care about the pain they cause among others. I just want you to know that this won't last forever. She will most likely grow out of it eventually so don't "hate" her during this situation. If anything, try to console her and help her in anyway possible. Maybe in the end she will end up listening to you and tell the truth. As for social services and court. Most cases like this will require evidence and considering they have one daughter saying it's completely false and one saying it's true they will have to decide on who to believe. Chances are they're going to believe you if you present them with evidence that her attitude has rapidly decreased since hanging out with the two friends that are bad influences. Once the people of the court see the evidence of her personality changing due to others they will possibly see that there is a chance of her lying. I know it may seem impossible to believe but in the end everything will work out. My advice to you is just take it all in calmly, handle the situation as best as you can and understand that things will eventually get better. Not only that, but this experience can only make you a stronger person. I hope this helped.
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ok, i went over to my boyfriends house for supper tonight. i helped him with his shoppers after school. by the way my name is alyssa and i'm a 15/f. but, then his siblings started getting on his nerves, he has 2 sisters ages 8 and 13 and a brother of 14. he kept telling them to leave us alone, i was enjoying the company of his sister though, cause he was working on his compuer and i was sitting next to him; he was in a chair i was sitting on the floor of my own choice. but his sisters friend was annoying him cause she wanted on the computer and whatnot (she even sat on his lap getting at the computer) then at supper he got really mad at his brother ( i didn't think he was doing anything wrong) and told him to 'go to hell'. his mom got mad at him and told him they would be talking later. then he told his mom that he didn't care and she sent him away from the table. but he wasen't mad at me or anything, but it was kinda freaky. is there somthing i could do to help him? i do see where he is comming from but i also see the other side.
his mom also thinks him being mad at me will be the big test in the relationship, wich i belive her now. what can i do to help him?
alyssa (link)
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Alyssa,
Sorry to hear your trip to your boyfriends house ended up being such a disaster for not only your boyfriend but for you as well. I understand that you see where they were both coming from which is what you may want to explain to your boyfriend. Calmly speak to him about his actions at dinner and how it made you really uncomfortable and maybe throw in that he doesn't have to treat his siblings like dirt to get a reaction. I don't see why he would be mad at you at all...if anything you were the mature one that handled the situation correctly and calmly. As for his Mom telling you about the "test" in the relationship. No offense to her but parents should never have a say in a relationship that they're not in. I hope this helped you.
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Okay so i need boy advice. He started to flirt with me and all, for a couple of days. But then he stopped. I think he stopped because he felt like I wasn't responding and I don't like im. BUT I DO!!!!! How do I get back to him flirting with me? How can I flirt with him? He's in my P.E. class and my best friend has given me advice, but I'm scared. I don't want to come on to strong. How can I let him know I'm intrested? (link)
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I've found the best way to communicate with someone your interested in/like would be to be honest with them. Like you said though, don't come on too strong because that may scare them away. I suggest just asking him for his phone number or asking him to "hang out" sometime. And take it from there...it will happen naturally and most likely faster than you think it will.
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Really had no idea where to put this topic.
and thanks ALOT for reading + replying to this!
I try to be more outgoing and junk.. but like, it doesnt work! I just get more like shy and nervous. sometimes its even nervewracking to just get out of my seat and hand in my test, so i sit there all period looking retarded so i dont have to get up. i mean, its sometimes, when im not in a good mood. its not like i dislike myself or anything.. but i dunno. i seem to get like anxious and when people are nice to me and im not in the mood, though i want to be, i cant like have fun because i feel lazy or like i cant do it or like im embarrassed. im usually not like this but it gets triggered when im in school. maybe its because i dont like my current state and im always saying about things i can improve in the future, like my clothes, and getting more friends, getting better grades.. things like that. i say this like everyday and im even saying it now for tomorrow. but.. then it doesnt really work. i have OK days which can be better and sometimes i be myself then sometimes feel embarrased or whatever over like little things. theres even some kid i like who i dont think will really like me back since he hasnt really seen the real me.. I mean, he's nice to me and all, but I dont want him to think im boring. or any other guys and people. people have been nice to me and stuff, then after a while its like they havent been talking to me and stuff, maybe because i cant catch up or im not as fun? i guess it has to do with my mood.. or i have no idea. im usually fun and stuff, but like.. after school i crash and this enormous headache seems to go away and i just let myself loose and sing and be more outgoing. especially with my neighborhood friends, whom i've known for ever. in school.. like i always say that the next day will be great then in school im counting the minutes on the clock for the next class to come. i dont want to waste my childhood by feeling uncomfortable and such. i dont even say my problems.. only on this site whom i've grow to trust, but.. alot of my problems i keep to myself. i dont even write in diaries because i always fear or someone reading them. i cant really explain it.. i mean, i can be open but not about really really personal things like some of the things i am saying, or some feelings i've felt (not crushes. but even those i say if im good friends with the person). i hope one day it just wont explode.. which is why i love to do sports because its like an outlet. sorry its so dramatic.. but my head is just going crazy. maybe its because of puberty. i have no idea!! it sucks!! i dont know if its because im not confident. i've always thought myself to being that way but maybe im not. maybe im just selfconcious and whatever. i like the way i look.. though i know some things that can be improved like i can pluck my eyebrows, shave my legs, stuff like that. maybe i should be asking.. how do i like my current state? there will always be chances that i can improve myself in the future but how can i get comfy with the way i am now and love myself the way i am now? also.. how do i become more organized? i always hand stuff in late because im always frazzled and wasting time doing nothing on the computer (like im doing now) then sleeping really late.. and sometimes like getting no sleep at all then heading towards school without properly doing homework or studying for tests. dont get me wrong, im a bright student and people know i am very smart. but my mom wont let me join things i like like cheerleading, lacrosse, gymnastics, dance, travel soccer.. well i dont get alot of those special things.. because for one thing.. my family isnt all that rich now (my dad is setting a new company which will be huge, and my moms the only one working.. shes a nurse.) maybe in the winter i can shovel snow with my buds? if thats a good idea.. im also grateful for other suggestions. ack.. why am i so disorganized? how can i fix this? how can i like myself fully now? sorry this is soo long.. but like, thank you very much if you can help because it will really help me a whole lot, in a life changing way, hopefully. again, thank you!!
also, im 13 years old, and a seventh grader. (a girl.. if you havent realized yet.) (link)
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Coming from someone who has gone through something very similar as a teen I hope my answer will help you in anyway possible. I know what it's like to be uncomfortable in school but then be outgoing in my neighborhood. You repeat many times in this message that your happy with yourself and you like the way you look. But, it doesn't sound that way. It almost sounds as if your self-conscious and concerned about how others are going to perceive you which explains your quietness in school. Really the only way to even coming close to fixing this or even slightly altering your lifestyle in school is learning to accept yourself. You have to understand that no matter how you dress, act, do your make up, play sports, what "clique" your in, etc. that your who you are and that person is amazing. I know that may sound corny but everyone is special in their own way and it's just a matter of accepting how special you are. Everyone is different and that's what makes people unique. And STOP making plans for yourself such as "Tomorrow I'm going to do this to be better" because in all honesty worrying about things such as changing yourself is what's going to cause your anxiety and unhappiness. Stop worrying about what your going to change about yourself in the future days and just be yourself and if people can't accept you for who you are then they weren't meant to be your friend in the first place. It may seem like life is a popularity contest now but it won't be later in life. You will end up only having a couple of close friends that truly mean the world to you. The rest are really defined as "acquaintances". As for becoming more organized..I suggest starting things immediately. The computer is really distracting so I would do your homework or any assignment for that matter before you sit down and get comfortable. Once you sit down and start surfing the web, talking to friends, reading e-mails, watching TV, etc. you won't want to get back up again and you'll just end up putting off work more and more. I hope this helped and just remember any of what may seem like your "flaws" aren't really flaws at all. Those so called "flaws" is what makes you an individual..which is something everyone posesses. Also, if you ever need to talk or just want someone to listen, feel free to message me.
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okay well im a junior in high school and i really am nervous about college. is anyone else nervous or is that not normal? i also need help on finding how to get college applications so if anyone can help me, please write to me. (link)
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It's completely natural to be nervous about college. Everyone goes through that no matter what age/grade but specifically in the older ages/grades (ie. Juniors). There are many reasons why people get nervous regarding college, some of them would include a fear of growing up, fear of leaving your home and loved ones, and a fear of failing. My advice to you is to just enjoy your life as it is right now and as for college...there are just more memories waiting to be made there. As for college applications I suggest going to your guidance counselor and asking them about perspective colleges or just go to colleges websites and request information and they will send you a packet that includes applications you could fill out. Hope I helped.
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