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too much liek a guy?
okay, well i kinda have a problem you see. no guys want to date me. i mean its not cause im ugly or a bitch or anything cause ive been told im good looking and sweet. No guys want to date me because they all see me as a friend. once my friend (a guy) asked the guy i liek if he would ever date me and all he said was " im not gay!". Im not a tomboy or anything, i like sports and everything and i play and watch them, but i dress like a girl and i try and make friends with girls, but i think their a little jealous cause i hang out with all their boyfriends and crushes. i dont want to change who i am and start to be prissy, because thats not who i am! but my question is: is there any way i can get boys to notice me more without changing drastically?
thanks in advance
Holly
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I agree with the previous responder - wait a while. You don't mention how old you are, but the emotional age of the guys you describe sounds like fifteen or sixteen, so I'm guessing you're in high school.
Bottom line: there's a world of difference between what BOYS find attractive, and what MEN find attractive.
Eventually, some intelligent, intuitive guy will realize that you're the catch of the century: a sweet, good-looking girl who he can relate to on many levels.
In the meantime, if you want to enhance your femininity without changing yourself, that's easy enough to do. If your hair is short, grow it longer; if you don't wear makeup, start putting on a little. Small, superficial changes in your appearance won't change who you actually are.
The ultimate cliche advice in such situations is "just be yourself". That doesn't mean you can't be a little flexible, though; after all, "yourself" is whatever you define it to be. So what you can do is think about tha kind of guys you want to attract, and nurture those qualities in yourself that they would find attractive. If you want a guy who likes intelligent women, educate yourself. If you want a guy who appreciates creative types, pick out some form of artistic expression and make yourself good at it. If you want him to admire you for your body, work out and stay in shape (you're probably already there, if you're involved with sports). In other words, they should like you for who you are, but you can make "who you are" be whatever you want.
Bottom line: patience. You'll find that when these boys grow up a little, you'll be someone who turns their heads.
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You sound just like me! I'm the girl who's invited to video game tournaments and boys' poker night, but can't get a date to save her life.
It's a really tricky situation. To really set yourself apart as a girl, you'd have to go to extremes, because, let's face it, these guys think of you as being one of them.
My advice: wait it out. I always had the same problem, and then I managed to find a guy who was actually looking for a girl who could hang out with his friends. I know it's really hard and irritating, but the best things come to those who wait.
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