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I need like a boost of confidence or something :(
14/f. ok so i'm a freshman. ever since probably like 7th and 8th grade, people have referred to me as "the girl who never talks" ok. theres this kid in 2 of my classes. my best friend has gym with him. i recently just worked on a project with him and another girl. so today my best friend told me she overheard him and this OTHER girl (who thinks shes the shit, anddd ive known since elementary school) talking about me! and they said. that i never talk. which is completely untrue. it bugs the shit outta me! because i know it isn't true. i can't help my shyness!! but in school idk what happens, but i'm just soo quiet. around my best friends and my friends and family i'm a totally different story though. but people always get the wrong impression in school, and for some reason assume i NEVER talk. ok, so i KNOW i can't go on like this forever, and i won't let that happen. i wanna make new friends. guy friends. have a boyfriend. but something is holding me back. i always miss my chances of saying something, but i don't. and i never let my true self show through. my friends all say i'm funny! but no one ever sees that. i KNOW i can't just wake up one day and magically be outgoing and sociable, so how can i get that motivation, or boost of confidence to become more social? how can i overcome my shyness? i'm so sick of being known as the shy girl. i just wanna like scream at the next person i hear say that. UGHH!! help mee!! thank you soo much.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Random Weirdos?
First off : forget what everyone else is saying about you. You obviously have to noticed if people are talking about you. Let them say what they want, according to you, do talk.. so they are just stupid people with the wrong impression of you.
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Now, to tell you be more yourself :] I use to be like you. I would always be quite and I would never say what I wanted too. Something held me back, like you say. The only thing you can do is each day.. try and talk a little more. If you want to say something, then just say it. It's your own thoughts and ideas.. nothing wrong with that. If you have the sudden urge to be loud then be loud. Don't worry about what the kids at school will think. Show them that, you are a total different person, show them the real you. Have your boyfriend help you if he can (if he knows the "loud" you). Don't worry about missing a chance to say something, you have all your life to say stuff, but dont hold back when you really want to say something.
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The next person that say something, do say something to them. They have no right to talk about you. They are not perfect and neather are you. They should understand that. So what if you are a shyer person.. theres nothing wrong with that. You know thats not you, you know who you really are, and thats all that matters.
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If you want to make new friends (guy friends), juse be yourself. Talk to them about anything. Ask them a question about the homework or the assiment. (if you know stuff about sports) ask them about that. Don't be scared to show yourself to them, there has to guys out there that would love to be yourfriend. Guys like girls that are confindent in themselves. Just say what you mean, and mean what you say. Thats they only thing to remember. Be true to yourself. You owe it to yourself to be who you are, and show everyone who you are. You dont have to go from shy to WOW in one day.. thats almost impossiable, take small steps and each day.. become more confident in yourself. Tell yourself that you can prove all those people who talk about you wrong.
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Be yourself, mean what you say and say what you mean, and have fun. You only have one life to live.. so live it to the fullest :]
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i on the other hand, am very social. It's hard for me to be quiet, and i get very annoying. It is very easy for me to meet new people, but soon after that, they get turned off by me because i get annoying. I guess you just have to go along with it. I guess i would just put myself out there. I try to be 'quieter' but then i can't or I don't talk and people think I am sad. It's a very hard subject. You just have to think to yourself that you want to be outgoing and do it.
hope I helped.
--meghan.
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ok, I have the EXACT same problem as you! I'm the shy girl too. I wish I could just wake up and be outgoing and social too but I know it cant happen. :[ I'm so loud and stuff around my friends and family and quiet next to people in school just like you sometimes people even think I'm depressed but I'm not!!
Heres my advice ... Its going to be hard to get started, I can tell you that but remember. be yourself around people they shouldn't mind. If they can be loud and stuff so can you. I know its hard to believe this because I find it hard and sometimes I can't even do this but this year I've become more able to talk to people. I know it sounds strange but I've been forcing myself to talk. I forced myself to start a conversation with the people in my group and now I can talk to them whenever we are in groups without feeling wierd.
It really helps once you loosen up and stuff. Once you start talking to people it gets easier and easier. I just started this a few weeks ago, I joined the school play with some friends and even knowing im in the play (not even a lead just in it as ensemble) made me feel a bit more confident about myself. If you need anymore suggestions please ask me, I have a lot to tell you but I think I've filled this box up a bit too much. So please send something 2 my inbox or something if you want to hear more!
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