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stupid boy...please help its making me depressed
i like this guy Matt, and ive liked him for this whole year basically. about 2-3 months ago he asked me out and then dumped me the next day and said "Im sorry for screwing around with you, i just cant get that girl Emma out of my head." Hes liked Emma for a long time too. Then like 15 minutes later hes like I love you Ana & i always will but i just cant get Emma out of my head and im like Okay...
Now hes over Emma and he likes another girl Katherine. Im going out wiht his best frined, but i dont want to dump him because i dont want him to get hurt. And im scared if i dump him, Matt wont be my friend either. Ever since i started dating Matts best friend, Matt is being really slack to me like calling me a bitch and stuff. I have told him things about Katherine that i heard from her friends, like shes a bitch and stuff, but Matt said that im no one to tell him who to like then i said that I just dont want him to get hurt then he didnt say anything. I just dont get his behaviour. Hes changed soo much. How can i make him be the way he was before - caring and sweet? Ive tried talking but he just gets pissed off.
Also, how can i make him like me again? This all is making me really upset. I even want to cry in the middle of class sometimes.
Thanks
Ana.
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You can't *make* anybody do anything. You can't make him back into the caring and sweet person you once thought he was and you can't make him like you. Actually, I think if you really put some thought into it you might come to see that A.) He was never really all that sweet and B.) He never really liked you that much.
Don't listen to what people say, especially not little boys. Not every thirteen year old guy is a little boy, but this Matt certainly is. Little boys want what they want when they want it, and don't care how it affects anyone. Little boys will say anything to avoid drama, even "I love you." Take them seriously, and you are welcoming in a broken heart.
Pay attention to what people do instead: Matt fooled around with you, gave you a totally lame excuse for a breakup, can't seem to stay attached to one girl for any decent length of time and is currently treating you like dirt.
Matt is acting like a jerk not because he is confused or jealous or anything like that. There is nothing you need to 'get' about his behavior but this: He is acting like a jerk because he is a jerk, and because he doesn't want you.
If you want to cry in the middle of class over this, go to the bathroom and bawl your eyes out. It's okay to be sad and upset. It's okay to be confused about what it is you want and who you like. The only thing that isn't okay is wasting anymore time fantasizing that you could actually have a happy relationship with this guy. You can't. Right now no girl could. He just isn't there yet. He probably never will be.
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Matt needs to grow the hell up. He's a selfish little brat, and you don't deserve to be treated this way just because he can't make up his mind about who he likes and whose heart he stomps on.
In just one case, though, Matt is right - it's not up to you to tell him who to like. You can't decide his feelings for him. You can tell him you think he's being disrespectful and childish, and that he needs to treat people better, but you can't make him feel a certain way about someone. It's also rather petty of you to talk trash about Katherine. Don't sink to that level!
Forget about dating Matt. He apparently can't handle a mature relationship, and you will be better off without him. Responding to his childishness with your own childishness will not solve anything.
Incidentally, people are usually friends with people who are like them. Since you are now dating Matt's best friend, make sure he doesn't treat you the same way Matt did. If he does, then wash your hands of both of them.
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