|
I love you?
Alright so I'm dating this guy for about a month. I really really care for him and he's so amazing to be around. I don't know whether I love him or not...but I feel like I do. I don't want to say anything, though, because I don't want to scare him away. I was just wondering what period of time do you think should elapse in a relationship before you say that you love someone? What's the "norm"?
thanks.
EM
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
There is no 'norm' with a relationship, each one is unique. That is one of the things that make it so special.
Do you love him?
Do you feel that without him around the world seems less bright and interesting? If you were to imagine a life without him, how does that make you feel? Do his opinions count more than others, whilst at the same time you retain your own? Does he make you feel comfortable and cherished and that you are the most important person in the world to him? Look down the years, can you see yourselves growing old together without feeling repelled by the thought of false teeth, bald patches etc?
If you can answer yes to all of these questions, the chances are that you do love him.
As for telling him you love him, it depends entirely on what he is like. Most men prefer to take the initiative on this one. If he is not yet at the same place as you, you do run the risk of frightening him off, regardless of his feelings for you. I would suggest waiting and playing it by ear. A month is quite early on in the relationship, so give it some time. You never know, he could display some personality trait you're not so keen on.
Hope that helps and good luck.
]
If you love someone tell them. Love is just an emotion. Emotions can change. It's not like by telling you that you love him you have to marry him. It should make him feel really good to know that you love him. Only positive things can come of this just as long he doesn't feel pressured into saying it too. That would be your only problem.
My advice to you would be to tell him that you love him, but don't just leave it at that. Have a conversation with him about it. Before you even say it, let him know that you are nervous about what you're about to say because you don't know how he will respond. After you say it, let him know that you just want him to know how you feel and you're not looking for him to say it back if he isn't sure if he feels the same way. If he is scared away, he's not ready to be in a relationship with you yet. Love isn't something that people should be afraid of.
I'm not sure what the norm would be, but the first time my fiance told me that he loved me was before we started dating and the first time I said it back was at the end of our very first date. I wasn't scared away by what he said. It made me start to care for him even more. I think that most people will react this way. Don't be afraid, be confident. It's ok to be a little nervous though. :)
Good luck!
]
More Questions: |