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Daughter has issues with wife-to-be
I am the Bride. The Groom has 3 daughters. I have known, loved, and enjoyed all 3 girls for years. We have shared a lot.
The Groom and I decided to finally marry after much soul searching, years of living together, breaking up, and finally getting back together, staying together for keeps. One HUGE problem -- daughter No. 3, the youngest, the most needed
( financially and emotionally ), the most spolied, and sometimes really mean, she decided that at about age 15 ( 10 years ago) to be horrible to me, and she has never stopped. She throws fits (use to on the floor kicking), refuses to talk, asks that I leave the house if she's coming for a visit, ignores me if I am in the same room, and she will probably make this wedding a living hell. Her father seems to agree.
Her sisters are fine with me. We are adults and we have our own issues. Nobody is casting any stones. His children are age 32, 29, 25. I am 39 this October. We have dated since I was 23, so for 17 years.
I have helped raise the girls, and I love them very much. However, I was also the ruler maker in our household. So like other would-be step moms with teenagers, we had our challenges, mainly with Traci. The girls are all married now with children of their own. How can I, we, break news and still enjoy our wedding and our life together?
The girls live 3 hours away by plane. We see them 4 or 5 times a year at family functions. We all get along well except for her.
The father is very worried that she will not talk to him, make the wedding problematic, not participate in family functions, and blame him.
What can we do?
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as hard as this may seem.you BOTH need to talk to her !!!!!if you dnt think you can send her a letter.explain to her that she dosnt have to agree with you,and she dosnt have to like you,but your getting masrried because you love her father.most kids are like this but if you love your fiance well enough you can take time to talk to her.you may not be able to tell,but shes listening .
let me know how it all wroks out
lots of love,lizzie
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Hubby to be needs to have a long overdue heart to heart with the 15 year old. I'm sure that since he doesn't see her real often that it has been a matter of not wanting to upset her during her visits but, now that you two are making it legal he needs to talk to her.
He needs to explain that bad behavior will not be tolerated at the wedding, or in your home from here on out. She needs told that if she is going to act up at the wedding she need not come. It may sound mean but it is YOUR day.
I understand how your fiancee is worried. But honestly she is playing him and getting away with it. Unless he puts his foot down it will just continue.
Good luck and congratulations. :)
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