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Dating / first date / do and donts
Dating / first date / do and donts
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What is a good date?
Good date starts with two people agreeing to see each other, somewhere casual for a possible match.
For men:
Please don't be late for your first date, because you know the first impression is usually the last. The casual doesn�¢??t mean sloppy. Some people thing why should I dress up if it is a casual affair. Wrong!
You want to look your best to have a lasting impression on the person you meet. For a guy, it is really nice to have a nice dress shirt (usually dark/black color) over the jeans; and please wear shoes, not the sneakers (you are not going for a jug!); clean hair, shaved and nice cologne....
When you get there before her, make sure you have nice and more or less quite place to seat and talk, so you could ask the host to reserve the table.
When she gets there, make sure you get up and give her appropriate greeting, may be a handshake first (everyone is different, not everyone wants to hug on the first date). Ask her if she found a place ok, and what she would like to drink (if she drinks) to break the ice.
When you have you initial conversation, remember, women like to be listen to, so give her a chance to talk and show how good of listener you are.
You can make a lot of observations by listening to the person, as to how they are, what their personality is like...When you talk about yourself, please remember you are not on the talk show, so make it nice and sweet.
If you are confident men, she will see it; you do not need to overdo it by getting carry away about yourself.
One other thing, that I've observed that some men on the date are all over the place, may be because they are nervous, or may they are used to looking all over the place to "scan for potential mate", but you already are on the date, so remember to keep your eyes on her. It makes you even look sexier, when you are looking at her eyes only.
I've also encountered some dates, where the men actually flirting with the waitress. When I saw that, I wanted to scream, and tell the girl: please get up and run! This recent situation, the guy had English accent, and the waiters tried to figure out where he was from, so the cute waitress leaned over the table and ask him that, and in response he said, "well if you guess where I am from, I will by you a drink". This is not very attractive, just plain rude. The waitress kept "coming on" to the guy (probably just fishing for a good tip!), and the guy was just leading her on. The girl who set across from him was puzzled, and confused, and I felt very bad for her. She looked very nice, and he actually looked like a slob (wrinkled shirt, and white sneakers??).
So, then guys actually ask, why there is no second date. I've been very nice to her, and the a total gentlemen. I treated her to dinner, and was very friendly and all that...
The other thing was, that the guy was just having conversation about himself, without giving her a chance to talk, you are understandably excited about meeting someone, but you need to let the other person express themselves.
When you are having conversation with the girl, you need to be real and open (not too open, no need for the drama of your life on the first date) and at the same time humble. This is very attractive to women, and also shows that you are mature and confident.
Meetings just for drinks is good, noone feels any obligations to each other (like having a dinner); but if you both feel immediate connection, moving to a dinner could be even more intimate; and then you go on from there.
If she really showed her interest, this is a good sign, but still doesn�¢??t mean anything..Unfortinately, women sometimes act the opposite when they are not attracted or interested, they act "extra" polite and "extra" nice, this is "kiss of death". Some times it is hard to figure those things out, but you'll see if she is relaxed and acts nice that there is a chance she is interested; if she is looking around, looking at the watch, doesn't look at your directly in to your eyes, but still is being very nice..well..this is just it..she wants to go home. You pick up these signs, just let go, do not try to "change" her mind, she had already made up hers. Just see if what she wants to do. She will give you the straight answer right there and then.
Tanya.
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