How to be successful in choosing and staying in a relationsh
Question Posted Monday July 17 2006, 3:49 am
How to be successful in choosing and staying in a relationship.
[ Answer this question ] Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category? Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life? Tanyaw answered Monday July 17 2006, 3:49 am: How to be successful in choosing and staying in a relationship.
We always ask ourselves a questions, why relationship don't last...
There is always a laundry list of things we say about each other that made the relationship to fail...
When we meet each other in our twenties, we are still growing up, and forming our characters and personalities; and the relationship usually don't work because we kind of "size each other down", till we get the "shape" we feel comfortable with, metaphorically speaking.
Another wards, we learn how to be in a relationship, and how to behave towards each other.
Then after the relationship is over, we go on and look for exactly what we got 'sized up for".
In our thirties, when we feel more mature, we have already formed and shaped our characters, personality and habits. So, chances are this is the way we are going to be for the rest of our lives; unless otherwise ther is some kind of "intervention" takes place, that makes 180 degree turn, and you change for good.
What most of men and women do not understand, that because we already "established" ourselves as characters, it is impossible to try to change someone, and why should we? So, when we do meet someone, we have to realize the fact, that this person had a life before you came in to his/hers; and have had numerous relationships, issues, problems, some of which can be really deep, and some arenâ??t...
So, it is up to you to say, these things I am willing to deal with, considering most of other important things to be great! And there would be something you will not; and do not things to close your eyes on it (you know what I am talking about); because they are not going anywhere....
There are some things, you have to simply realize comes with the territory; etc a lot of people come from painful divorces, long term relationships, broken marriages...So, if there are things you can also relate to, you can make it easier for each other, by sharing your experiences, and possibly make each other feel better. If this is not your "thing" move on.
Do not disregard anyone because of their shortcomings and issues ; perhaps you see yourself in this person, or you also have certain things about yourself, your friends and family do not tell you about or put up with.
In general, people do adjust (not change) to each other, to their partnerâ??s life stile and interests; some of us also come down a little bit coming from unpredictable single life style...So, at the end of the day, you may be very happy with the person you chose...
Another wards, we can be more open minded about the people we meet, without lowering our expectation, but simply looking objectively and realistically at the situation and the person!
What we do not realize that sometimes you meet a broken soul you can fix, and this person can become your personal hero by changing your life forever! Give each other a chance, and look deep inside, beyond what's on the surface...
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