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Not really an advice column anymore
Hi... You know, I've been exploring columns. You know, isn't this supposed to be a site where people need help to make a decision, or want people's opinions. It's not like that anymore. People are asking good questions, but they're not advice quuestions. And some girls are always saying "Me and my boyfriend had sex, do you think I'm pregnant?" I'm so sick of those questions. And people are putting in lyrics to a song they heard and are asking what the song is? Isn't there a way to prevent this?
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Want to answer more questions in the Technology category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Advicenators?
Let me put it to you like this:
We answer what people ask, and well, that is what people ask.
If you could see the questions we delete, you would understand a little better what is going on here.
Most people come here from search engines... the top search phrase is: "How do I"
"How do you feel about..." doesn't even appear in the list.
It is a long standing tradition here, that if you don't like the questions that are being asked, you ask your own questions.
The whole problem boils down to this:
This site is primarily trafficked by whiny 13 year-old emo-girls with zero self esteem, and all of them appear to have exactly the same problems:
They don't know what a hymen is.
They really, seriously, do not understand the concept of pregnancy. (You know, like sperm has to be in the same country as an egg in order for anything productive to happen?)
They have a boy (different one every few days) who they are ready to kill themselves over (every few days.)
They want to know if a boy who said was stupid enough to be caught looking in their general direction is in love with them.
Most of them have some form of discharge, and feel that the rest of us need to know the color and consistency of said discharge.
They all think they are fat.
They can't spell pregnant, had sex, then want total strangers who have no way of knowing if they are preggers to tell them that everything will be fine.
They want to steal music, but they are too stupid to type the same thing they asked here into Google, which would give them an instant answer to the title they seek.
I am sure there are others I am forgetting, but by now you should get the point.
We get literally thousands of the same question every month.
What to do about it?
Well, if we deleted all the whiny 13 year-old emo-girl questions... what would the other whiny 13 year-old emo-girls answer?
Has it occurred to you that most of the people here couldn't answer an important question if there life depended on it?
There are some, who are really brilliant. They may be 13, but they are neither whiny, nor emo.
If you doubt my take on this... you would be wrong. Here is an example for you:
A man posted here asking for help getting out from under his rather large gambling debts, and would you like to know what answer he received?
'you could babysit til you get wut you want' ... says whiny 13 year-old emo-girl deluxe.
No concept of reality. She should not be giving advice to anyone about anything which is above her understanding, yet she pops up to give her unwanted and completely worthless opinion on one thing after another that she hasn't a damn clue about.
Why should people post serious questions here if that is the only response they will get?
As for not being advice, well, let me put it like this:
If you are re-building the engine in your car, and you want to know which brand of bearings you would be best to use for the horsepower mods you have been making... that is an advice question.
If you are stuck on a level in a video game, and need ADVICE on getting past it, ask away.
You see, every time someone comes on here with a question that isn't about boys, pregnancy, discharge, periods, magically vanishing hymens, the name of a song or whatever else will not be important to them next week, they run that person off the site.
"How do I?" is just as lovely as "How do you feel about?" ... in fact there is no reason at all to persecute those who ask questions seeking useful physical knowledge.
Q: "What brand of 1/2" ratchet is the best made, in your opinion?"
A: "Williams made the only wrench my Dad is incapable of breaking. You need to trust me that this is a technical feat worth noting. E-mail for details."
Q: "How do I tell a boy I like him?"
A: "How about: Hey... boy... yes you. I like you."
Q: "There is this one area on an old game called Dragon's Lair where I am stuck. What do I do when the lizard king attacks me?"
A: "Follow the flashes of light that the game shows you to indicate where you should go. When the lizard king is above you attacking, the flash above you isn't to tell you to go up, it is your sword, so hit the sword button then and leave the joystick alone. Good luck!"
These are all asking for advice. Just because some are questions that most people here cannot answer, doesn't make them any less worthy.
If you see a question you can't answer, head to Google and do RESEARCH to see if you can find the answer.
I have learned more looking up answers to things I hadn't a clue about than practically any other way.
In short, it all goes like this:
If you take all the whiny 13 year-old emo-girls off this site, it would be wonderful, and interesting.
The questions would be more thought provoking, and the answers wouldn't be 'i dunno lyk do wuthever!'
It is important for you, and everyone else to understand that:
Being 13 years old is NOT the problem.
Being a girl is NOT the problem.
Not understanding reality IS the problem.
Having no ability to relate to any problem beyond boys, periods, discharge and pregnancy IS the problem.
Telling people 'go find sum car site u old creep' when they asked for advice on turbocharger replacement brands for their vehicle IS the problem.
Thinking that nothing outside of the things mentioned above even EXISTS... IS the problem.
In short, people who:
Have zero self confidence
Need constant reassurance for every little thing
Burst into tears any time someone insults them, and has to tell us ALLLLL about it
Have never actually earned a dollar, shekel, ruble, in their life
Haven't mastered basic things like 'you" instead of 'u'
Don't know the first thing about responsibility for anyone other than themselves
Don't care about anything other than themselves
and... have I mentioned yet:
Are so incredibly selfish and self absorbed that they have no interest in anyone else unless it is to call them ugly, fat or something else they know will hurt the person just because it makes them feel better about themselves
... people who are all, or most of those things have no business answering anything outside of boy, period, discharge, pregnancy, etc questions.
They also only ask questions like that.
Simple logic will tell you: We have mostly people like that... so we have mostly questions like that.
The only, and I mean only, solutions to this problem are:
Get the majority of the people here some instant life experience.
Broaden the spectrum of people who come here.
Do NOT chase away people who are not whiny 13 year-old emo-girls every chance you get.
Start supporting the site, so we can advertise to bring in more people from outside our circle of friends.
... and try to each ask at least one intelligent public question per month.
Failing that, we can be patient and hope things improve on their own, or I can close the site.
I would prefer if people supported the site, we could advertise AND asked intelligent questions to the pool.
Has it occurred to you that if all there are on this site are whiny 13 year-old emo-girls asking whiny 13 year-old emo-girl questions while giving whiny 13 year-old emo-girl answers... That all this site will EVER attract are whiny 13 year-old emo-girls?
It has occurred to me. It makes me sad.
You know what keeps this site going? Examples like RainbowCherrie.
She was 13 when I got here... but she cares enough to do her best when answering questions.
She goes out of her way to look things up if she doesn't know an answer.
If you didn't know she wasn't 30, you would generally not be able to tell from her advice.
You see, being 13 doesn't make a person ignorant or incapable of answering real questions.
I have proof. :-)
Why aren't there more like her? I think there are... they just don't come here because all the questions most people here could answer, they are smart enough to look up on Google.
RC is here because she cares. What a nice change from the usual.
Anyway, as you can tell I have been pondering this for some time... aren't you glad you asked? :-)
DN.
P.S. To anyone else reading this... as long as you are not the person I describe in this document, you should not be offended.
If the phrase "whiny 13 year-old emo-girl" offends you, stop being one.
If you are the person described in this document, please pack your gear and get off this site or grow the heck up already... the choice is yours.
OK, I am really done now... promise.
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