Hi, I have I problem that I'm hoping you can resolve, for some reason I feel like a child, I'm a female teenager hoplessly in love (16). I've know this guy for quiet some time now, four years and he's one of my best friends, and I've devleoped these strong feelings for him. I had got advice from a friend and she said to work and improve yourself and you never know if he will show an interest in you. And so I did, I was over weight last summer and I lost a bit, and I'm proud, and showed interest in lots of activitys he was in. But the problem is now I'm getting asked out by alot of other guys but him, and the only one I want to be with is him, yet he still acts like he has no feelings for me. So I told him I had feelings for him and has been sort of... ignoring me in a sence. I think I just lost him completely, what should I do?
First of all I have to congragulate you on losing weight...you should be proud of yourself!!!
I hope you did that for yourself though, and not for him, or anyone else.
K...onto your problem. You guys have been friends for a long time, so the first thing that runs through my head, is that he doesn't want to jeopordize your friendship, by getting romantic. Alot of times that can happen.
One of the hardest things in life..young or old...is having feelings for someone who doesn't return them. That hurts alot. I'm not saying this is your case, but if you told him you have feelings for him, and he starts ignorning you could mean a couple of things.
One, he may be processing what you told him...he could be thinking holy crap...she likes me...it may need to sink in. Two, he unfortunately may not return those feelings, therefore he doesn't want to hurt you or your friendship.
You need to remember that you have the right to be in a relationship where the feelings are 100% mutual. You don't want to be with someone who doesn't want to be with you.
I think you and him need to sit down and just talk about it. That way whatever you decide to do, won't interfere with the friendship.
If you can talk about it like adults without fighting you have an excellent chance of maintaining the friendship as it is....and you may even decide to give the romance thing a try. If not, then say yes to one of the other guys that are asking you out. You will need to move on, and that's a great way to do it.
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