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I don't know where it's going from here.
My best friend, we can call her H, just told me she was bi, and now has a girlfriend. Now don't get me wrong, i have no problem with her being bi, it's just i'm soo weirded out, because 2 months ago, she was grossed out about people being Bi, and said she'd never be it. Now yesterday she was confused if she was bi or not, and today shes "sure" she is and she has a girlfriend.
I'm just so weirded out by it, and i don't know why.
Any ideas what could be my problem, it's kind of sad i don't even know what i'm feeling, maybe this situation was the same with someone else? if so, please help. Thanks.
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Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Not so long ago, one of my really good friends came out as being bi also. One day at her house she told me she thought she was attracted to this chick, and I was okay with it. She went on to tell me that all of her escapades with girls at parties (alot of people had been hearing that she made out with girls at parties) and she told me that she only does it say when she's drunk to give her an excuse if other people say something about it. And then, a few days later, in front of another three of our friends at our house she told everyone she was bi also.
The similarity in this is she also used to be grossed out by homosexual people. She used to also make jokes about gays and just act completely grossed out about it.
I, too, am going through alot of the same feelings as you are. It weirds me out that all of the sudden there's this twist thrown at her but I realize I can't change it. She's my friend and I'm going to be there to support her, but she realizes I'm going to need time to adjust to it also.
I think the same goes for you. Talk to her about it and tell her that while you are okay with it, it will take you a little time to sort out your feelings about it. And you will, you can. It just takes time. Best of luck!
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Your friend is going through a very akward time in her life. She's confused, and trying to find herself. Right now, what she needs is support. As best friends, you should always support eachother, no matter what.
It's very understandable for you to be weirded out by your bestfriend being bi. You're going through a major change right now. In a matter of time, you will get used to your friend being bi. If you want to talk about this more feel free to ask me another question or IM me.
♥ Lydia
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Questioning one's sexuality is very confusing. When she was grossed out by it, she might have been disgusted by her own feelings, or that may have been her way of testing the water. She might have just said that to see how you reacted, so that she would know if she could come out to you. About changing her mind...well, it happens a lot. I've gone through several phases when I only liked women, and others when I've only liked men, which I'm certain confused my friends. I also go through phases where I want to have lots of children, but right now I just want to have cats. People change their minds, teenagers especially. We're trying out different roles to see what we want our life to be like when we're adults. And it doesn't take very long to change your mind. It could take a second. Your friend had an entire night to become "sure" about it.
And I bet this isn't the last time she changes her mind.
Now, about your problem. You don't actually have one. There's nothing wrong with feeling the way you do--it's a perfectly natural reaction. It's like you're in an amusement park, and your friend is pulling you by the wrist. The second you get to the ferris wheel, she turns and pulls you to the roller coaster. What you need to do is break away from her, and go sit on a bench or something. In other words, stop caring so much about her sexual orientation. Like I said, she's going to change her mind a lot. She's going to come up to you and say, "I don't like guys at all--I'm completely gay now!" You smile and nod and say, "That's nice." Because I guarantee that within a month, she's going to have a boyfriend. Just let her experiment, let her make her own mistakes, and don't concern yourself with what she does unless she's in danger. Her orientation is not your problem. She's still herself no matter what happens, focus on that. Just let it be, and the weirded out-ness will go away. I know it seems hard, but it isn't. Just take a deep breath, clear your mind, and accept. Do this as many times as you need to. Trust me, I've done it and it never fails.
Good luck!
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