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Not sure what to do about it...
To make a long story short, I used to drink, a lot. Well after a friend passed away from a drunk driving car wreck, I tried not to, but I still did. Finally, I was able to give up alcohol. Since Thanksgiving I've had not even enough alcohol to fill up a wine glass. I'm proud of myself, especially since I'm 15. The bad thing is, I've started to cut my wrists again. You see, drinking took my mind off my problems, and I know it didn't solve anything, because not only were my problems still there, but I had a headach to go along with them. To try to stop myself from driniking, every time I wanted to have some kind of alcoholic beverage, I'd write a poem instead. It helped at first, it kept my mind of the cravings. But then the cravings just got worse. So I turned back to my old ways of cutting my wrists. I really want to stop, but I don't know any other way to just get out my feelings. Well, I do, it's just that when you're so frustrated, or upset, it's hard to think straight so you do the first thing that comes to mind. It's kind of hard to explain. And I would prefer not being told to talk to anybody, because I have, and I don't just mean talking to friends, I've talked to responsible adults too. After talking, I stop what I'm doing for a little bit, but after a week, or a month, or even two-three months, the stress gets so overwhelming that I start up again, and it's just not something I want to be doing. I know I want to change, it's just hard.
Any advice is appreciated.
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Well, you obviously need stress manegment, because these things are overwhelming you. To try to stop your wrist cutting, do something different, like take a punching bag or something. You're overwhelmed by stress, at school or something and try to manage it better. Whenever you get a craving, tell one of your friends first so they can watch you. If your friends are the problem or part of it, tell someone who doesnt drink that you trust to help you. If your problems are in school, talk to a teacher or guidance counseler and try to keep everything organized, like buying a planner. If your stress is at home, like parents bothering you, what I do is that when my parents bother me, I agree with what they say, and then write about it, in a journal, or make a poem out of it like you said. You can also take stress out in sports a lot, running really feels like you are destroying your problems, and there will no longer be there. Hope I helped you!
Joey xox
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You haven't said what it is that's happened to you to put you in this position but I'm guessing it's not just every day stresses with school and so on.
The problem is that you can't ignore whatever it is that's happened to you and you can't talk about them non-stop because at some point you have to let some of it go.
What you really need to do is to find a suitable outlet for your emotions. You know, Vincent Van Gogh suffered with depression, as did many other great artists and performers. The connection is that they found ways to express themselves without self harming (unless you count Van Gogh chopping off his ear...but we'll look past that for now) and that is exactly what you need to do.
I think it might be beneficial to you if you were to look into taking an art class or a drama class or perhaps something physical like yoga or pilates or tai chi. If you have creative outlets of physical outlets, it can often help, particularly with the problems that you have had because they can keep you moving and occupy your mind enough to distract you from cravings and thoughts of self harm.
Also, I know you say you don't want to talk to anyone about it but I really think it might be a good idea for you to speak to your doctor about this. Personally, I don't like anti depressents but they do work for a lot of people and it might help you if you were on them at least for a little while. You've done so well giving up alcohol that it's a huge shame you're mutilating yourself now as well. I do understand how you feel because I used to have a friend who did the same thing. She said that cutting was the only way to take her mind off everything that had happened and it was like releasing all her emotions. But it's not a good way to do things.
So PLEASE at least consider taking up some form of hobby, creative or physical and consider seeing your GP for either anti depressents or some counselling. You need to learn that there's a great life waiting ahead of you and you're going to destroy that if you don't learn to let go of your past, however hard that might be. Please be strong and you will get through this.
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First of all, bravo on giving up alcohol. That is a very addicting habit that is harmful to your heath. As for your cutting, I know you don't want to hear it, but you just might need professional help. Even if it's just someone to talk to. Nobody can make you stop cutting but you. You need someone to talk to all the time. Not just someone to talk to you for a little while, but someone to talk you through the stress and anxiety you feel when you want to cut.
Good luck. If your a strong person, you'll get over this. Have faith.
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Hey. Its good that you've tried to talk to people, because thats a way to help you out a lot. I suggest, get some rubberbands, and every time you feel the erge to cut, just fling a rubberband so that it hits your skin. Your right, cutting shouldnt be something to take your frustration and anger onto. Why would you want to alter your body by doing that? Keep on talking to people, even though you probably dont want to. Deffinitly try the rubberband thing. And, ask your parents to watch out that you dont take pointy objects with you. I'm sorry if I wasnt able to help much, this is a very serious topic, so hopefully I helped you a little bit, if you didnt like my advice, please don't rate me low, i just wanted to help you in some small way. Good Luck! Seriously.
-Brina
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I am going to tell you what you said you don't want to hear.
You do need to talk to someone again. But instead of just talking to them and parting ways, see if you can't go into therapy or a type of rehab. That would do alot more for you than just talking to someone else about all your stress and the issue you have with cutting and drinking, alot more.
Perhaps you could just ignore some of the strss you have? Do something more entertaining and captivating of your time and get your mind off your stress and any negative feelings your feeling. I know it sound weak, but when you actually are putting more focus into something and concentrate on it, your emotions become in tune with what your doing, allowing your other emotions to be temporarily suppressed. It's worth a try if you havn't already.
I really hope this helped you in any way. And I wish you the best of luck with this. You have a prayer from me.
-Ryan
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