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Not sure if I like him anymore...
My current boyfriend and I have been going out for about a month. Here's the problem: My boyfriend makes me think of my EX. He does not
remind me of my ex...at all. He just makes me think of my ex boyfriend...more than when I was single. And heres the weird part: I dumped my ex TWO YEARS AGO! I'm not sure if I like my boyfriend right now. He's seriously the sweetest boy ever and all the things I'd want in a guy but I just don't feel the inital attraction I've felt going into this relationship. I need help...opinions, advice, suggestions, anything
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hmm this is a tuffie, i would say to do some soul seraching and compare the two and finalize the situation at hand, sure he's the best but are you sure? relationships are a hard and complecated thing. If you must just talk to your guy and maybe things will led up. hope this helps
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Its kind of funny, because the same thing happened to me around a month ago.
My suggestion is to stick with him, unless you find someone you are extremely attracted to. There's so litte love nowadays, and if you break it off with someone who loves you.. well, you may never find it again. Its like that quote, "You never realize what you have until its gone."
I think you should put some serious thought into this before you make any moves.
Hope I helped =)
Jacki
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I wholly identify with your problem, since the same thing happnened to me in my last relationship but one. What I think has happened is that a contrast has been set up in your mind between your ex and your current. I'm guessing that your ex boyfriend was not as sweet a guy as your current-perhaps he was even the teensiest bit of an a**hole? Just a guess and do forgive me if I'm wrong. But if I'm right, then what you're feeling is quite natural, if seemingly perverse. If you are subconsciously contrasting the two, then you might also start to long for your ex, even though you dumped him all that time ago.
So much for my analysis-you need advice on what to do. I say keep quiet about it, do as many different things with your current as possible, and wait it out. A little nervousness is common at the start of a relationship, and it is at this very time that the ghosts of past loves come back-just to make things harder for us. But I guarantee that if you rush to dump your current boyfriend who is so sweet, you may well regret it later.
Good luck, and feel free to drop a question in my inbox should the situation develop.
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Perhaps the reason you are thinking of your ex is that, in some way, you are disappointed by the relationship you are currently in. You say you no longer feel attracted to him in the way that you did when you began dating. Maybe it's just that because you no longer feel the same way, your mind is fixating on your ex because you were more attracted to him and he reminds you of what else is out there.
Regardless of the reasons why your ex has popped into your mind all of a sudden, if you no longer feel attracted to the boy you're with then maybe you should not be continuing the relationship. After all, if the attraction is gone, where else is there for the relationship to go?
Given what you have said, you might be far better off ending the relationship now, to save unintentionally leading him on and to give yourself a chance at finding someone you truly do want. You mustn't feel too bad that this has happened as it is very common for people to feel attracted to each other initially but for these feelings to fade after a short time. The best thing is to resolve the problem now, rather than letting it drag on.
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