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need a guys opinion
Hi Silly Rob,
I wanted to ask you a question because your advice cuts to the chase and you don't sugar coat things. Also, you're a guy and I need a guys opinion.
Well I am friends with a married man and his marriage has been dead for the last two years. He is in his early 40's and has never had children, and his wife (it's her second marriage) is ten years older then him and has two grown kids in their 30's who have stolen money from him. They are both herion addicts and the last time her son stole from him he told everyone that he wanted to punch him out. They ( him and his wife) have nothing in common and fight constantly. She is a chain smoker ( and he's a non smoker) so I think that's an issue in the marriage. Everyone has seen them fighting, they fight in public and he has called her stupid behind her back.
Anyways, now that I've established what a rocky marriage they have, I'll get into the question part. Well I am 27 and have never had children. One day I was talking to my married friend and told him how much I wanted to be a mother one day. He was listening intently and told me what a great mom I would be. I've also (when he's been with his wife) caught him looking at me with these large sad eyes. I think he has real feelings for me because he gave me his old computer and desk without me even asking for it.
Well I know what your thinking, that I am a little homewrecker but we have never done anything sexual. Infact he knows that I am saving myself for my husband and that I want to be in a stable marriage. I am a Christian and would never have an affair.
I think he would be a good father and I know how unhappy he is with his wife.
Should I tell him how I feel, maybe he is feeling the same but is scared to say anything.
Do you think we have any chance together?
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Normally I would say, "Leave them alone, don't do anything that would cause them to break up," but that is when fourteen year old girls talk about how that bitch stole the hot guy they liked. It sounds like this guy is miserable tough, and could be doing a lot better. So I think you should say something to him. Even if you both don't end up together, at least get him out of that unhappy future it seems he's about to have. If things do end up working out, and he is the great man and father you think he'd be, then it works out in the end for the both of you.
Don't think of yourself as a homewrecker. I'm very against cheating and being unfaithful to your partnes, but from what you've told me there isn't anything unfaithful. You're just looking out for your friend. So just start by finding out how he really feels about his marriage and getting him through that. Don't just come out with, "Divorce her and marry me," but help him get to a point where he can figure out what he really wants to do. Be a friend first, and more when he's ready.
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