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Love leaves and life has been hell
Ok soo I dont know where else to really turn now. My boyfriend moved back to his home state, which is 3 1/2 hours from where I live, and we broke up 3 days before he did to "make things easier" or so he says. He didnt want to try a long distance relationship b/c he thought it would be too hard. Well, he is/was the love of my life... I spent the whole summer with him. He was everything to me and he didnt even say good bye when he left which crushed me. Well my life has been going down hill since. I use to be an "a" student, but now my grades are consisting of "c" and "d"... I'm missing school beyond no measure, I've gotten kicked outta my house, I've made my mother cry several times (which is bad b/c my mother is hard to upset that bad), I even had to buy my first pregnancy test (was negative...), I've started to become everything I never wanted to be. I dont know what is up with me, I hate him so much yet my heart is screaming for him... I dont want to give up b/c I love him so much, but its one sided and somethign else kinda love... Any suggestions to how to deal with these feelings would be GREATLY appreicated.. I rate high!
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You need to understand the charade he has been playing the entire summer. He was just using you for the summer, knowing that he would leave you behind. He just wanted to get some ass before he left. Now it's your job to admit that he did that, and move on with life.
That's just how life can go. You need work on getting over men like that. Or work on not being so easily tricked.
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I really feel for you as I went through almost the exact same thing a few years ago. My boyfriend moved away and broke up suddenly and I really was a mess and started acting all crazy. Its really the worse. Here's what I did that got me through....
Just stop for a second and take a deep breath and consider this:
1. Who are you really hurting? Yourself, your family, people you love.
2. Is any of this behavior in any way helping you get over your boyfriend or get him back? No. didn't think so.
3. Long term, if you don't have him, what do you have? A lot. More than you know. You have an incredible future ahead of you if you get back on track. Clearly you are smart, with the grades you get in school. You are a caring person with the capacity to love and to be loved. Those things, brains and heart will be the things that will get you through the tough stuff and will bring you great things.
Look, he's either going to realize his loss and call you or he won't. There is no way to control other people, but you can control yourself...Allow yourself to have a good life and to try and be happy. Its hard, but know deep in your heart that you are going to be ok whatever happens with him.
Tell your mom what's going on and why you are feeling the way you are feeling. My mom was awesome during my bad break up once she knew what was going on.
Best of luck. Keep me posted. Trust me, after this guy I never dated a guy who broke my heart again and found and married the coolest nicest guy ever. And that guy is still alone.
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First off my heart goes out for you it really dose but you shouldnt allow this problem to hurt your familly and most impordantly yourself. I understand completley that it is so hard to "fall out of love" with someone, infact it's nearly impossible. There will always be a tiny bit of you that will have feelings for him but it's time to say goodbye. You should start off by taking some time for yourself to really think deeply about your life and decide what you wanna do. After that get back on the dating scene! You sound like a sweet caring person who will give 110% in a relation and that's excellent. Let go to him and find someone who will make you happy. That's the best I can do if your situation get's worst please get back to me.
-Andrew
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OMG please give up on him. DON'T let your life go to shit because he left you. According to the thing I'm reading, you're sixteen. You have an entire life ahead of you, and you're giving up on it for a guy? Please, forget about him, do better in school, try and make up with your parents, get back at home, and fix your life. That is the best advice you could get right there.
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