|
humorist-workshop
okay me n this boy been talkin for a year in october off n on. Then in June or July he sits me down and tells me he has a gf and of course i broke down in tears crying and he was sitting there telling me he was sorry and that he didnt mean to hurt me and he also told me that he wanted to talk to me because he really liked me and that he didnt want noone else talking to me or to have me so he did the "dummy" and started to talk to me but i guess overtime we fell for eachother and he tells me he loves me and we have sex he come over calls me everyday it couldnt be any perfect and i also love him too but the big thing that stays in the back of my head is his gf and heres the thing his gf i kno and we are sorta of cool ike if we see eachother we'll say hey thats it.but i wanna telll him to pick one of us but then agian i dont wanna lose him he tells me he wants to be with me and the stuff he does with me he doesnt do wit her. i love this boy so much i think bout him all the time what should i do bout the gf situation??
[ ]
Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Hmm...this is a tough one. First off thanks for dropping it in my inbox, feel free to do so any other time you'd like.
Well he says he loves you and you love him, right? If you wanted to start or even continue a good friendship or relationship, communication is key. How? Well picture this: would you want him to tell you that he's only doing and saying all of that because he feels bad for you and would choose his gf over you? I'm guessing you would want to know that, not saying thats the case. What I mean to say is that in any sort of relationship being open and telling eachother everything is important...trust me on that one. If you ever have doubts, questions, bad feeling about something, thats what you tell each other and talk about.
You want him to just choose and make up his mind...but at the same time not lose him? Well I'll let you know one thing, or maybe you already knew it, but some guys are alot more emotional than you think. Not saying this guy is, but its usually more difficult for a guy to sort out his feelings when it comes to love and all of that. It can be done, but because not all guys deal with that subject all the time or even want to, its difficult - thats mostly because guys don't like to uhh 'let it all out' and tell everyone what they are feeling.
First you should ask him about his gf. Ask him what he honestly thinks of her, what he wants to do, and if he intends to keep things going on between the two of you while he still has a gf. No offence, but I'm sure that if you were ever in the situation where you were being cheated on, you'd want to know right away, as most people would. Would you want it going on for so long and not knowing about it? Of course not. So tell him that and ask him to sort out his feelings between the both of you. Thats not asking to choose one over the other, but just to clarify things up as to why he likes you and why he likes her. You don't have to say: hey choose one of us right now or else! Try something more like: I think you need to sort things out with yourself and then with both of us, because if you keep things going, we are all going to end up getting hurt...which is true. Let him know that you aren't pressuring him and that you aren't making him lean to your side [as much as you want to], because really, you'd want his love for you to be his own decision, and not your persuasion.
As for telling him all that and being afraid of losing him...don't be afraid. The fact that you are willing to take a step and put an end to what could turn out to be a disaster shows character, and he should be able to see that. What I'm guessing he doesn't want to do, as well as I'm sure any other guy, is hurt the other girl's feelings, which is probably why he hasn't broken up with her. Don't expect to get totally rejected, and plus - you know him, so you'll know how to ask him and how to bring this all upon him. Don't say: oh because you said this and did that it has to be me. That might only guilt him into choosing you, and I'm sure you wouldn't want that. But in the event that he does choose his gf over you, even though you love him you didn't lose, and I'll tell you why: 1. You now have less of a chance of being hurt if things don't work out
2. He's still your friend and can still talk to him about regular things
3. He loved you once, so who's to say he can't again or still doesn't.
Anyways I hope that helped. If you need anything else or wasn't sure on what I said let me know and I'll be glad to help. Good luck!
]
More Questions:<<< Previous Question: ?
| Next Question >>> MILK
|
|