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So, I'm concerned about my friend...
I'm..extremely afraid for a close friend of mine, although I don't show it so much. I know that she thinks of it as not much of a big deal, but I do and I see what could come from it. I want her to go to a doctor, but she doesn't want to and refuses to. She also doesn't want her parents to know, because her parents blame her for everything. This friend of mine has been depressed because a 15-month, serious relationship with someone ended, due to circumstances that she doesn't understand. He got over it too quickly and doesn't care about her at all, despite everything they went through together, and gee, did they go through a lot. I don't know if the problems that she's having is somehow affiliated with her depression, but it scares me. She never feels like eating. She tries because she knows that not-eating is bad for her, but her body refuses the food and she ends up throwing it up later. Her stomach hurts from time to time and she also has severe, continuous headaches. She takes Advil or something to attempt to cure it, and it never works, but she keeps on taking more and more, thinking that more would help her, somehow. So that would be overdosing. If it doesn't help the first time, what makes her think that it would help any other time, right? She's addicted to them or something..and it really worries me. She told me to give her a limit of how much she could take when she got home, and I told her, two at a time, twice, until she slept. She agreed, yet she broke this agreement and took six. I don't know why she's throwing up..or even WHAT she's throwing up since she hardly eats a thing...and..I'm just really concerned. I don't know what to do, and I don't know what kind of advice you could give me for this..if any at all, but I'm just scared for her.
Thanks, ahead of time. :]
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Friendship?
Talk to this person about all this. Don't just sit back and worry. Really confront them because things only will get worse. Drug overdose is so harmful and never helps. Don't go running to a doctor but really sit them down face to face and ask them why they're doing this. It's a RESULT of something that's going wrong in their lives. People like this usually just need somebody to talk to, thus the depression. They're probably holing everything up inside and it's going to get worse if they keep doing that. Really talk to her one on one, okay? It sounds like you know what to say to her. Just trust your instincts.
4Him, Disciple
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I'm not sure if i can help, but i'm sure going to try okay? Wow, where to start. Let me mention, when people don't admit that things are going rough for them, then most likely they are. And when she doesn't want to go to a doctor or tell her parents, i understand but i still know that's wrong. And you mentioned that her parents blame her for everything. THAT DEFINITELY IS GOING TO RUIN ALL THOUGHTS OF TELLING THEM ANYTHING, i should know. To me, this sounds like a bad depression. A really bad depression. The throwing up, drug over-dosage, everything are symptoms of depression. But don't freak out and don't go running to a doctor. So right now, be a really good friend to her and show her that you're constantly there for her. Sometimes the best medicine for this is knowing somebody loves you. People get so hurt and lonely (specially after this relationship ended) that they desperately need somebody just to be there, you know??? So that's the first step. Second, sit her down and talk to her about all this. Tell her what you're basically telling me. I'm mostly worried about the drug overdosage right now because that's a really bad thing to do. So mention that first and tell her about the health risks. Sometimes you basically have to scare people to get them to listen, i should know. And about this eating disorder. I'm glad she's trying, but throwing up??? That's physically harmful too, and i'm sure you both realize that.TALK TO HER ABOUT THIS. Don't drag her to a counselor or nothing but just do one-on-one. Explain to her why you're worried (you definitely have a reason to be) and why she needs to STOP. You mentioned that you can see where all this is going and personally when i see that in my friends, i get scared. I love my friends as you do too so i try and fix things as soon as possible. Don't put this off thinking you'll lose a friend if you tell her to stop. What's more important...her friendship or her life??? I hope you pick the second one. If you do then i think that explains it all. I'm beggin you though, don't let this go. You're seeing a person who's in depression and basically given up hope (thus not wanting to bother to eat). Talk to her face to face. Don't do it over the phone but face to face if you can. It's way more personal and you can actually see them. Just dont rush things and constantly remind her that you love her and will ALWAYS BE THERE FOR HER. Once that really soaks in, i think she'll get better. Wow, i wrote a lot but i hope i helped. Write back about what's going on. I'd love to help you some more!!!
4Him, Disciple
my email is e.sherhart@att.net (i check it everyday for y'all) and my sn is rikatree2375...that's for if you need help or just somebody to talk to..or if you want the actual person to talk to me. I've been through a lot of that so i understand.
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