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hey im 13/f and i really like this kid and hes 15. i have liked him for an EXTREMELY LONG time. but, i only get to see him every friday. most people tell me just to tell him, but i have no idea if i want to, or if i even should. ebcasue i always think why would a 15 yr old want to go out with a 13 yr old girl, ya know ? there are older girls out there. but i really need to come down to an alternative here, casue i really have NO IDEA what to do/say. PEASE HELP ME
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
There isn't really anything in particular that you could say to him; I don't know if he likes you or not, but either way, you're not going to be able to change how he feels. "Like" and love are emotions, and while words can certainly have an impact on emotions, the process is usually slow (unless you say something really mean, of course), and minor.
It sounds as if you're thinking of telling him you like him as more than a friend. And you're afraid to, because you're not sure how he'll react.
I have to tell you up front that since I've never met either of you, and you obviously know him pretty well, I'm not going to have a better idea of how he feels about you than you already do.
But I CAN say this. Most girls mature more quickly than most boys. I don't know if that's true for you, but it is in most cases. I can also say that if a boy likes a girl, a 2-year difference means almost nothing.
EXCEPT. The problem is that you two are at an *awfully* important age - particularly you. You're *just* crossing the threshold from being a girl to being a woman, and depending on your level of maturity - physical *and* mental - he may still see you as a child. Particularly since it sounds as if he's known you since before puberty.
That said, it's true that almost any boy can't help but notice when a girl is starting to mature. That's basic biology.
So what you need to do is think about how he treats you, and watch how he treats you in the future. Does he act like you're a little girl? Or does he treat you just as a friend, as if he didn't notice that you're a girl? Or does he sometimes get a little shy, or compliment you? Those are the clues that will give you some idea of how he feels.
You might also want to talk to your friends, if you can trust them not to gossip to everyone about it. Why do "most people" want you to tell him? Do they have some REASON to think he likes you as more than a friend?
Another important issue is how your family and his would feel about you two being together. Is he dating now? Could he, if he wanted to? What about you?
To be honest, because of your age I suspect that you'll need to wait a little while longer. At 13 you just might be a little TOO close still to being a child for him to be comfortable - I may be wrong about that, of course.
In a year or so that may change. There's a big difference between 13 and 14.
In any case, after you've thought about it some more (although I'm sure you've already thought about it a lot), you could always try just talking to him. The best way to find out how a person feels about you is often just to *ask* them.
You could ask him if he'd like to go to see a movie with you, or tell him you want to go to a carnival, concert, or some other event. If you want to make it less obvious that it's a date, you could arrange a group activity with some friends and ask him if he'd like to come too.
If he says no, try not to feel too hurt; he might have some good reason that he can't. Or it just might be too early for him, in which case you could try again in a six months or a year. Or, to face the worst possibility, it might be that he just doesn't feel "that way" about you. In which case, there are two things to remember:
1. There are a LOT of boys out there in the world. Many of them are sure to like you, and of those, there will be some that you'll like a lot, too. Since you're 13, you have your whole dating life ahead of you. And while you might feel now as if you'll never like anyone else, believe me: you will. The human heart heals amazingly quickly. Of course, I hope that you don't have to face that possibility.
2. Another possibility is that his feelings will change with time. In six months or a year you'll probably have changed a lot, and he'll have changed, too. He might feel differently. YOU might feel differently. There's no way to know, now.
I wish you the best of luck!
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