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The current state of affairs
Hello again, I thought I would drop you a line to let you know what happened these last days.
Let's see... where to begin... Okay, the last friday my girlfriend went with her parents (as she does every 2 or 3 weekends), so I had some time to be by myself, which was good. That afternoon I had to meet the other girl, she was also worried about me and she is a good friend so we met and went out for a walk, ice cream and stuff and then I told her about my situation. I had been thinking a lot, should I tell her, or not? I decided I had to share that with a good friend, and finally decided I would tell her.
So I did, I explained how lots of things had been affecting me lately... work, (ex)friends, more work, the routine of a 6-year relationship... and that I had felt an attraction for another girl, and that she was that girl, although I understood that was just a fantasy and that it could mean a problem with my relationship with my gf. She was shocked at first, of course, but as I believed, she was really understanding and kind with me. I feared she would be mad, or even quit being my friend, but she said she realized what I felt was neither something you could avoid feeling, nor could it be easily dismissed. She also asked me not to tell my girlfriend about her, so things between them would be fine.
After that (a long while), we went for some drinks and then home. The next day I was quite relieved, although I was worried she would be feeling bad because of what I told her; I started having serious doubts about what I did, but after talking to her again on the phone, things were back to kind of normal.
The next day my girlfriend returned and we had a talk; I didn't mention the other girl, I just said I was having a crisis with so much work, friends, etc, and mainly about our relationship, questioning myself if we were good together, or it was just mutual affection and comfort, that I was also experiencing a lack of desire and our sex life could really improve... you know. I was strangely calm; I suppose after the bad times of the last two weeks, I was so overcharged with emotions that after telling the other girl, and then telling my girlfriend, I was really relieved.
She was also quite calm at first, although that afternoon she got pretty sad; I feel bad for having to deal with these matters, but I guess it's better to just leave problems aside.
Right now, after several days, I feel more focused, and am currently away from home (staying with my father now, let's hope things remain calm). I really need 2 or 3 days to myself, and I'm starting to see things clear. I still have feelings for the other girl, but I'm still dealing with that, trying to rationalize it. I expect to be feeling better in two days' time.
Phew, that was a long message. I am sure I forgot something, but that was pretty much what happened lately, although there's still work to do, and lots of meditation :)
Thanks for reading these lines. I hope you people are having a good time. Kind regards.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
I am so glad that you are feeling better. It is probably such a relief to have it all out of your system. Make it a point to let it out form now on...before it builds up into something so large it seems overwhelming.
I'm sure after a few days on your own you will no what you want to do with your future...or at least have an idea. Best of luck to you. Stop back in if I can help with it any further. :)
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