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Another question after your response
Hi, and first of all thanks for taking the time to answer me before. I have updated my question with additional info, and would be willing to read further comments from you, if any.
(My previous question with the addiotional info is here: [Link](Mouse over link to see full location))
Right now I am between two options. Telling my friend about the hard time I am having, and then telling my girlfriend what happened to me and try to find a cause and a solution. The other option is keeping it all inside, which feels like trying to fool or cheat myself.
Maybe I will just tell the other girl I HAD a thing for her some time ago, and that it was really hard to cope with and really painful, and that she'll eventually find the love of her life. I'm so confused right now... but I definitely have to make a decision before friday, because that'd be the chance to tell or remain silent. Thanks in advance.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
People confess because it is freeing to them. They don't do it for the sake of the person they are telling, it's completely selfish.
What happened with your girlfriend to make you stray?
Honestly though, stop thinking with your dick, if your girlfriend loves you and isn't a bitch and a half why would you throw away the relationship for sex?
If this really is tearing you up though maybe you need to be alone. You need everyone to dump you so that later in life you don't take things for granted. I'm sorry but I'm not buying the you being a real sensitive guy thing.
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Thanks so much for allowing me to update following your added comments. :)
First thing, tell the girlfriend first. You are probably smart enough to know that already, I add it because you may not be thinking clearly at the moment.
I am really glad that you have decided to try and work things out. So many don't anymore. Divorce/breaking up is sooo much easier and that is unfortunate. Relationships need to be worked on each and every day to stay strong. Somewhere along the way you and your lady got off track. It can be fixed if you both really want to be.
I have been married for 30 years. I have been through what you are feeling with my husband. It is not an uncommon thing. You need to work on your communication with your girlfriend. Set aside time each day just to talk or simply be together.
If it is easier for you (as it is for me) sit down before you talk with your girlfriend and write out everything you are feeling. Everything you want out of your relationship, what about it you like, what you'd want to change, why you think you are feeling the way you are etc. Tell your girlfriend a little about what is going on and tell her you would like her to read about it before you talk further. Then give her what you've written. I used email.
This is easier because you won't get interrupted while trying to explain and get thrown off track...so easy to do. You want to get EVERYTHING out there on the table for discussion.
I hope telling her works out well for you. I think if you want changes, you're right...has to be done. It could very well make your relationship stronger.
As for telling the friend what you have been feeling...up to you. Discuss that with the girlfriend after you talk. You do know she may not want you to have anything more to do with the friend. You will have to be able to accept that if you want things to work out. Personally, I see no need to explain to the friend but I don't know the situation. I suppose she will have to have an explanation as to why you guys won't be hanging around with her anymore.
You know where to find my inbox if you want to ask anything more about the above. I wish you the best of luck. If you have the time and inclination, I would really like to know how it works out for you both. :)
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