I am completely obsessed with my friend. I moved to where I am now when I was 12, just before 7th grade (I'm now 15 and in 9th grade). There's this one pretty, athletic 'popular girl' that I saw and befreinded. We became friends, and I had her spend the night at my house and all- I also became friends with her best friend, and had both of them spend the night quite a few times. I thought everything was going good, but in January- it was then I noticed that neither of them had ever invited me to spend the night at their houses at all. They had never invited me to do anything, or ever called me. I thought in time they would. At camp that year, it was terrible. They had friends there they ignored me for. All of them would sit on Her bed, leaving me alone on my own. I tried to get them to notice me, sitting their alone, with no luck. When we were all setting up chairs of where to sit, they all got seats and didn't save me one, and I sat alone behind them, trying to blink back tears. The next year at camp was the worst so far. She and her friends ditched me worse than ever the intire time. It was a nightmare. Well, in late July, I confronted her on aim. It was terrible. I was all like YOU ALWAYS IGNORE ME AND I JUST GOT TIRED OF IT and she's all 'you should have told me'.anyhow, few months later i watched her and her best friend with some others walk off to go do something, while i watched trying HARD not to cry. its now like 6 months later, and i have new friends but all lyrics of every song i write is about her. every song i hear is about her. every day at school i think about her. every night at home i think about her. in everything i do, i think about her. i can't help it. i dream about her. i don't know what to do- i thought i was over her before, but i guess i'm not. i just want it all to be over.
I guess I'm so obsessed with all the pain she caused me because I've never had a boyfriend and so I've never had my heart broken. But she, she taught me how to bleed. I think about her more than any other person. I even dream about her, I dream that we're friends, best friends, and she laughs with me and throws her arms around me...
I just can't take it anymore... How can I get over this? How can I make it STOP?
Additional info, added Saturday April 30 2005, 5:12 pm: Also, I always write all these angry songs about her. Because she hurt me so much and made me so angry. All the songs that come on the radio like Linkonparks Numb always seem to apply to her, as well as the song "I hate everything about you, why do I love you" and "Behind these Hazel Eyes", so as you can see- every angry or hurt song seems to apply to her, and that makes it all the worse, and makes me think about her more!
Khrysty answered Saturday April 30 2005, 5:14 pm: Hse probaly just used u for some reason. you go to her and talk to her and talk to her and I don't mean in a sweet vioce I mean you better say things are going wrong like you just can't take it no more. Talk mean!!!! and if she don' want to be friends anyway, then say f*** you!! I don't need you!!! [ Khrysty's advice column | Ask Khrysty A Question ]
Micah answered Saturday April 30 2005, 5:13 pm: this is kinda weird. it almost sounds like love in a way. you must have really wanted this girl to like you, to notice you and to be friends with you. i think you should just completely focus on something else, try finding an even better friend. but it really does seem like love, you cant stop thinking about her, you dream about her, and so on... i dont know... you need to find out what it is thats making you not be able to get your mind off of her. find out who you are in the inside. let your mind wonder. [ Micah's advice column | Ask Micah A Question ]
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