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14/f
Hi! Ok, I am a BIG Christian and I want to stay a virgin until I am married. That's one of my goals. Well, I don't have a boyfriend right now, even though I have had dork ones in the past, and I get... how should I say it... sexual desires. Like I'm afraid that I want to have sex SO bad and that I'll do it before I'm married. I don't want that! TO reduce these, I can't masturbate or any of that shit, and I don't know anyting else. What could I do to reduce sexual desires? Because it seems sooo hard! I mean, come one! It's just aaah! I want to have sex and stuff, but I want to stay a virgin until I'm married (I mentioned that before too many times, lol, sorry!) So, what do you say I do? Anything to reduce sexual desires?
This is a serious question------ please don't delete!
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Hey, well I am glad that you came on here for help. I am also not going to having sexual relations until I am married and have found myself in the same situation as you before. What I think you should do is spot exactly what might give you these "sexual desires" and try to avoid those situations.
For example, lets say watching dating shows or romantic movies (that may include adult type situations concerning sex and promoting desire) gives you excitement, just try to stop watching movies or shows like that.
If you still don't understand how you can do that, just think about your religious beliefs everytime you get these desires. Your faith should be able to reassure you that you won't fall to sex before marriage (im not judging your faith if thats what it sounds like sorry, im just trying to say that if you look inside yourself you'll see that your desire for sex isnt as great as your desire to obey/respect the word of the LORD by waiting to have sex till marriage).
If my advice isn't deep enough or you still have questions concerning your situation or even just have a weak moment, just follow your faith and you may ask me more questions if you would like to.
Like I said, I've been in your situation before and have found these ways a great help to me during my weaker moments.
With Love,
Kori
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I find it great that you don't want to have sex until your married. Its a a gold star for you in my book b^_o
But the best way to avoid any sort of lust for sex is simply to avoid situations where those desires will show. Such as if a BF tries something or asks. You have to firmly say no and mean it. Pray to God to help you through this if you think praying helps. It helps give you hope and keep you in focus. Plus you can always keep your mind occupied through things like school work or church events. Hobbies and other things like that will also help.
Its understandable that it will be hard, but you have to be determined and work at it. Eventually, it will all come natural to you and you won't even sweat something like this. Because you have a long way to go at your age, and though you want to have sex now, guys are going to push you on more and more as you and they get older. But if you practice abstinence and don't get caught up in any situation that puts you in things that lead you astray, you will find life much easier. And keep praying, if you think it will help. God will always be there to help you if you believe he will.
I still think its great your choosing to wait. Its a choice too many people I know didn't make and now have a lot to deal with...
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