I am 17-year-old straight girl, and the guy I like is gay. I've tried everything to get over him, but there just aren't any other guys left in my school that meet my standards. Is it okay to keep having a crush on him, knowing it will never happen, until I get to college and meet new people? He knows that I used to like him, but I let him think that I got over him because I didn't want it to ruin our friendship. I'm worried that if I make it clear that I still have some pretty strong feelings, he will keep feeling guilty and apologizing to me (which is what did before), or worse, decide to go out with me out of pity. I want to be honest, but I don't want to make things more awkward than they need to be. How much should I tell him?
The feelings might persist, and that is okay, but don’t tell yourself that you aren’t getting over him, because the idea that you just have to accept the feelings from what they are until distance and new experiences help you move on… that is very mature, and if you can follow through, a good way to deal with your emotions.
If he asks, tell him you know it will never happen and you are dealing with that. You can even gently joke that you are expecting a lot of fabulous seniors at college and you are sure you can find someone to help you forget all about your gay high school buddy.
russianspy1234 answered Thursday July 31 2008, 10:02 pm: unrequited love is a lot like hanging from a rusty meathook, yeah it hurts, but it sure is difficult to let go. nothing wrong with liking someone you cant have, it happens all the time. eventually, you will meet someone new and move on. and nothing wrong with not telling him. [ russianspy1234's advice column | Ask russianspy1234 A Question ]
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