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This guy, Mark, and I like each other and he asked me out today. Two days ago I would have automatically said yes but I found out something about him so I had to say I’d think about it. All I found out is who he is best friends with, Chris. Chris is dating one of my friends who I’ve recently stopped talking to because of the way she’s been acting since she started dating him. Around one month after they started going out, she gave him oral. This is something she would have never done with her ex boyfriend who she went out with for a year. This guy is a total dick and doesn’t even actually like her. So I started thinking about Mark and was wondering if he’d turn out the same way as Chris. I mean they are best friends and they do hang around each other all the time. I know that just because his friend is like doesn’t mean that Mark is either but it bothers me so much .I’ve know Mark since August but we only talk during 5th period because that’s the only time I see him. But I do believe I know him pretty well. He has a pretty good head on his shoulders and the only ‘wrong’ thing he does it drink…a lot. I don’t care about that because at my school it’s not a big deal. Do you think I have anything to be worried about with him being best friends with a guy like Chris? If it helps at all, I'm 14 adn he is 16.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Yes, of course you have something to worry about. He's of the male gender, you always have something to worry about.
Ok, I'm just kidding... sort of.
Anyway... You can't automatically brush this guy off as being as much of an asshole as his friend, but I would watch out for any signals that he might turn into one.
Have you talked to him about your fears? Would you feel comfortable talking to him about your fears of this? If you wouldn't feel comfortalbe talking to him a little bit about these fears, then you might want to stay away.
But I would say that you should go to a quiet place where the two of you can maturely and comfortalby talk about some things.
Get to know each other more and ask about his asshole friends, and also other friends that he has. Since you only talk to him one period out of the day, you need to get to know him more before you give him a definate answer.
And if he's a nice guy, he'll completely understand. You could make a date of it, go out to eat at a nice quiet restaurant, or just go to the mall and hang out walking around.
You don't have to necessarily be boyfriend and girlfriend as soon as you have one date. But you should probably give him a slight benefit of the doubt before you decide if he's a jerk like his friend. But whatever you do, don't get too attatched. It's very easy to meet a "nice" guy, only see the good things, and totally ignore the really important, bad things about a guy.
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