When I started Junior High, I noticed this guy and he seemed pretty cool. At first I kind of thought he was weird because of the way he looked (long hair,converse high-tops..etc) but then I got to know him and sort of developed a crush on him. By the end of 7th grade I became OBSESSED and one night with a box cutter, I just carved his name into my arm. He never noticed. It seemed like he had a crush on me too for a while, he would call me things like "cutie" and "sweetie" . The beginning of the year he seemed like he liked me still, and I hadn't told him about my scar. I needed to get it off my chest, so I told my friend who has him 6th period to tell him and she did. After school he looked scared and luckily he didn't see me. The next few days he would look at me and the stare at the ground. He supposedly said he "hated me" because I carved his name into my arm. It doesn't make sense, how could he change his feelings that quickly? Now he thinks I'm this weirdo. What should I do? I still have major feelings for him, even though I don't show it. Because I feel like I can't. Please help me.
It's good that you told him about it, it would have been worse if he had found out for himself. Try telling him that you are sorry if you weirded him out by doing what you did but that it was just an expression of your feelings.
dancinqueen08 answered Saturday January 8 2005, 10:01 pm: It probably scared him that someone had such strong feelings (or thought they had such strong feelings) for him and would carve his name in their arm. I think you might want to give him some space for a little while so you don't scare him anymore. Maybe when it seems that he is not so scared, you can talk to him and explain youself to him. I'm sorry if this is mean and you don't want to hear it, but I don't think you should have carved his name in your arm in the first place. You were in 7th grade and that young you are never sure of your feelings completely. Besides you should never harm yourself because of a guy even if it is to impress him. Sorry if this isn't what you wanted to hear, but it is the truth. [ dancinqueen08's advice column | Ask dancinqueen08 A Question ]
BloNdieSs_Kic_AsS answered Saturday January 8 2005, 5:40 pm: well yah i did that b eofre t0o i think everoyn ewent tho a fase like that in jr high, but all you did wasjust scare the shit out of him becuase thats like scary if i found out some guy carved my name in his hand i would tottaly not be nice to him any more so he would stop talking to me and stuff. so hes probely doing that.. you meessed up by telling him about that because its to early, and plus when you look back on the carving thing your going to think you were insane to.. becuase i still hjave scar on my hand also and its the most dumbest thing i think i EVER did in my life lol [ BloNdieSs_Kic_AsS's advice column | Ask BloNdieSs_Kic_AsS A Question ]
x0_Blink182_Fan answered Saturday January 8 2005, 3:13 pm: From a guys standpiont...first off cutting someones name into your arm is technigly beenin a cutter...that right there could get you into a hospital...I see where he is comming from on the whole you wierd thing...im not saying you are but its not normal...If his emotions changed so quick over that one thing thought then he sounds kinda like a jerk...but thats just what i think [ x0_Blink182_Fan's advice column | Ask x0_Blink182_Fan A Question ]
sohojules26 answered Saturday January 8 2005, 3:03 pm: You can't erase what you did on your arm...but you can talk to him about it. Tell him you really care about his feelings and that your sorry it bothered him. If he's a nice guy, he'll forgive you, but if not, he'll keep on acting like a weird mean person. If so, it's time to move on.=) ♥ Julia [ sohojules26's advice column | Ask sohojules26 A Question ]
Shelbyjune answered Saturday January 8 2005, 2:47 pm: He doesn't hate you, hun. He's terrified, not of you, but probably for you. Your carving his name into you is SELF-MUTILATION. This is obsession, fanaticism. It is not enough to talk to him one on one. In fact, you probably won't be able to, he probably won't do it.
You need to speak to a therapist. If you can't see a therapist, talk with your school counselor. And you need to do this immediately. I don't mean to scare you, but this is a sign of something that may become more dangerous (mentally and emotionally) to you. You need help -- get it. Talk to someone.
Keep in touch. Let me know -- I'm concerned. firstname.lastname@example.org [ Shelbyjune's advice column | Ask Shelbyjune A Question ]
Karen answered Saturday January 8 2005, 2:04 pm: Ok sweetie, guys get freaked out if you do something like that. Why would you cut yourself, especially carving someone's name into your arm? Now this guy knows that you are obsessed with him and obsession can lead to many problems. You need to talk to him one on one and tell him why you did this. Tell him that you aren't weird and you didn't mean to. Hope I helped :)
-Karen [ Karen's advice column | Ask Karen A Question ]
xXxpinky615xXx answered Saturday January 8 2005, 2:00 pm: The only reason he think's your a weirdo is because of this statement: "and one night with a box cutter, I just carved his name into my arm". Have you ever even spoken to him? Or did you just have your little flirtacious moments with eachother calling eachother "cutie" and "sweetie" and pet names and such? My question to you is, why the hell would you cut yourself. Let alone cut someone's name into your arm. It does make sence. He should have changed his feelings about you so quickly. You shouldn't have done that to yourself. He probably liked you and wanted to date you up until the point when he realized you were self mutilating. He probably doesn't want to be dealing with anyone that is going to be hurting themself. If you still like him and you want to date him, talk to him. Tell him that it was stupid of you to cut his name into your arm, because it was. And tell him that you'd like to have a relationship with him eventually. Of course he looked scared when your friend told him that you took out a <b>box cutter</b> and carved it into your arm. I don't blame him. And don't think that I don't know what you're going through because I do. I used to cut myself and I must admit that it was one of the stupidest things I had ever done to myself. You need help. Cutting is a very bad thing for someone to do. [ xXxpinky615xXx's advice column | Ask xXxpinky615xXx A Question ]
KaTiE_LyNn answered Saturday January 8 2005, 1:59 pm: you need to sit down and talk to him one on one. tell him how you feel and that what you did was stupid and you werent thinking. you shouldve told him about your scar, but thats in the past. tell him that you have really strong feelings for him and try to make him understand.
x3 KaTiE LyNn [ KaTiE_LyNn's advice column | Ask KaTiE_LyNn A Question ]
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