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my boyfriend is driving me nuts!!!!!!!!!!!
I have been with my boyfriend for about a year 1/2 now. Lateley he has just been getting up underneath my skin so bad he never wants to go to the places tht i want to go to. I have this weekemd planned for all my friends and him at thsi island near cedar point i asked him if he was gonna have fun and party he said no cause he doesnt want to spend the money. I dont understand i dont think were so much alike anymore he never has fun hes always talking about his car that hes fixing up. he put a body kist on his car rims and all that stupid stuff its always about his car hes constantly always talking about and doing something to it. im happy hes doig that instead of drugs but come on its a getting alittle out of control how can i get him to let loose and be more relaxed hes always so up tight and worrying about his money situtaion he has a good job but hell still ask me to pay something because he wants to get something for his car i dont know what to do its getting to the point where im not sure if i even want to be with him what can i do to relax and stay with him even if it ends up not happeing how can i let him go without hurting him??? please help im going to go insane!!!!!!!!!
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
Ok, first of all you guys have been together for quiet a while, so you must be comfortable around each other... therefore talking to him shouldn't be a problem.
Second, I think you need to work things out for yourself first and be honest with yourself.. do you still love him??
Breaking up with someone is huge...!!!
Tell him how you feel about him and his car and not being able to feel relaxed and have fun anymore. That is of course if you still want to be with him.
If your using the whole car thing to get out of the relationship, then using it for an excuse to his face is the wrong way about it.
My advice.... Work out if you want to be with him, then talk to him about the problem. Communication is the key, if you havn't talked to him about it he may not know how your feeling.
Second, if you do not wish to be with him anymore then unfortunately your going to have to bite the dust and break it off. You have to remember that it's not going to be easy for him if you decide to break up because he's going to be the one still in love.
There is nothing you can do or say to him that will make it better or hurt less!
Well I hope I helped and I hope you work things out for the best with your boyfriend.
Good luck :)
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It sounds like you're just getting too used to each other. You've been together for a while and now the appreciation for each other is going downhill.
Have you tried flat out telling your boyfriend that you want him to have fun with you instead of working on his car all the time? You shouldn't be paying anything for him just so that he can get more stuff for his car. You need to let him know how you're feeling and why you're feeling it.
You have to be understanding if he doesn't want to go party. Not everyone is into that. But he should let that go and at least have a good time.
Don't attack him with it and make him feel like he's doing everything wrong. But let him know that you wish he would focus on things other than his car every once in a while.
Sometimes people change and grow apart. Maybe you guys are just going your separate ways with your different priorities. But I wouldn't give up on him just yet. You've put a lot of time into this relationship, so before you do anything drastic, ask yourself some questions.
What are his positives? Is he sweet, romantic, dependable, helpful, nice, understanding? Why have you guys been dating so long? How would you feel if he was no longer in your life?
It may seem like him going out with you and partying is the most important thing right now, but it most likely isn't. Maybe you guys just have different definitions of fun? Maybe going to parties and getting wasted isn't fun for him? Try to compromise and find things that you BOTH like to do and that you can do together. Do you both like a certain type of movie? Make a trip to the movie theater. Try to spend a night out with just the two of you. Do something that will re-spark the love and appreciation in your relationship.
Darby
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