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Sex at Fourteen
Okay, I figured I would ask you for help because I need a woman's point of view on this, and really quickly.
I'm fourteen, and about a week ago I had sex for the first time with my boyfriend. It was meaningful, gentle, and... great. We had fun, and I feel comfortable with him, and our relationship is pretty serious.
My parents were looking through my room a couple days ago - I'm still not sure why - and they found a few condoms I had on hand (although they were hidden among my things.) Then they went through my journal and read the little bit I wrote about the experience, which made me feel incredibly violated. They got really angry and upset, and want me to talk to a therapist about my "bad decisions."
The truth is, I don't feel like I made a bad decision. I trust my boyfriend, I used protection, and I feel emotionally and physically secure. I think we have shown each other enough responsibility and maturity to handle a sexual relationship. I tried to express that to my mom, and she just got really upset and started to cry.
I realize it may not be a "social norm" to have sex at fourteen, but I was ready, and it feels right between us. I'm not sure where to go from here.
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It's tough for parents to deal with the fact that they can't control every decision their kid makes, that's just the fact of it. Be nice to them. Help them deal. Don't try to convince them you know what you're doing because they won't believe you. They have to go through their own acceptance. If they really feel like paying for therapy I guess let them, maybe you can talk to the therapist about how your family relationship, because that's what I think is really in for one after all this has gone on.
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