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How can I deal with people not liking me for no real reason?
People really love to gossip about me and I keep hearing that they don't like me.
The thing is that I've never been mean to anyone, I am not cocky, I always try to be as polite as possible etc.
Most of these people have never talked to me outside school, they don't even talk to me IN school. Yet they pretend like they know I am a horrible person without knowing me at all.
This makes me really sad and I doubt myself as a person. It also leads to me not liking myself very much. Furthermore, it just makes me feel very angry.
I have one more year left, how can I deal with this and not care about what they think of me? How can I like myself as a person?
The reason this bothers me so much is because they have never taken the time to actually have a conversation with me, yet they decide to dislike me for no reason at all.
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Ok i know this one WELL, so i can understand.
Like the other person said there IS always going to be people that wont like you no matter how hard you try. BUT (and this is a major one so pay attention) you CAN cut down the number of people who say things about you by trying a couple of simple things.....
What you can do (and this is what i have used for years) is to do something called "killing people with kindness" Now if your willing to put in the effort, you can do this.
I was actually quite popular in high school i talked to everybody but there was still people who didnt like me because of it. The battle they suffered was not with me it was with themselves.
You need to be able to be a little outspoken in order to do what im about to suggest so be prepared.
When theres people talking about you and you know who they are, if you see an opportunity to go up to them and do something nice or say something nice DO IT. Weather its infront of their friends or weather its by themselves and your the only one to witness it. Pretend like you dont know what they said about you and compliment them on their outfit or their hair or something like that. This will show that person that whatever it was they DID say, doesnt faze you and your going to continue being unaffected by them or their negative BS and be happy no matter what because whatever it was they said means nothing to you and you dont care.
Pretending to have never heard what they said (if it ws through a bunch of other people) is just hear say, unless they said it to your face. If they say something mean to your face then just laugh and be like "hahhaa OKAYY" and walk off and pretend like you dont care. MAKE them see that nothing they do or say (unless their willing to be nice) matters. see? and in reality it DOESNT anyway! see how great that is?
Just keep being nice to the friends you have, when THEY tell you things that "other people are saying" just say you dont care because their life doesnt matter to you anyway" and this will also let your real friends know that (if THEY were making this stuff up and telling you just to get you upset for any reason) that it still doesnt effect you.
See, ive had people tell ME before (who i thought were good friends of mine) that these OTHER PEOPLE were talking about me when they WERNT! just to keep me away from that person because they were jealous or controlling and didnt want to lose me as a friend because of their own insecurities. So if you just answer back "ehhh i dont care, i dont know them and if thats how they wanna be then thats fine, thats on them" then it shows that your so neutral about it all that your not even willing to say anything back about the person that your "friend" can accurately SAY that you said.
Sometimes people will lie to you and say "this girl said this and this about you" in an effort to get YOU to say something bad back about Females can be really back stabbing at times so you have to be careful not to fall into the social traps they can set up.
good luck, ; )
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Hey!
One thing I will tell you is you can't make everyone love you/like you. Just screw those people, ignore them. I know that's probably really hard to do despite the things they say about you. People like that are not worth your time. Don't let things like that get to you. Life will always have obstacles like that, but you need to learn to get over them. They're just trying to hurt you, but you need to be strong and ignore those hateful comments. Once they figure out that you don't give any fucks about what they say, it'll stop. DON'T SHOW ANY WEAKNESS! Who gives a shit about what they have to say. The reason people do that is because they don't have a life so they go into other people's life. Stay strong! I believe in you!
-Swimmer133
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