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I Can't Stop Thinking About My Virginity.
Years ago when I was around the age of 13 going on 14, I was friends with this guy (he was 17). We both had a group of mutual friends, so we camped out one night. Me and him were in the same side of the tent, and he started kissing me, which I was okay with, and we did other stuff, which I was also okay with. Then he asked me if I was a virgin and, of course, I said yes because I was, and I wanted it to stay that way! I told him that I was, and he said ''we won't have sex then'' and I said ''okay''. A few seconds later he put it in anyway, and I had no idea what to do. It took me a while to realise what was happening (I was a virgin, I didn't know what sex felt like!), and when I did I started panicking, I had no idea what to do, I thought it was too late to tell him to stop. So we ended up having sex, and when we eventually finished, I cried myself to sleep, and the next day I rushed home as quick as possible, not telling anyone. And the very next day I felt so ashamed of myself that I did it again, I slept with him, again. I've been beating myself up about it and I take my virginity very seriously, before then I had a purity ring! I started to feel very depressed after that, and I tried to kill myself. Every time I think about it I cringe, panic and cry. How do I stop thinking about it? Did I lose my virginity to him or was he taking advantage of me? Please help!!
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Maybe give some free advice about: Virginity?
Dear Girl virginity is considered as an important rating of a girl as pious in some cultures. However it is not the sure sign of virginity since hymen can be torn or raptured by any means without undergoing vaginal sex Now regarding restoring this property of a virgin girl as a doctor i can guide you a shot medical way . If u are interested pl contact me at doctorpirzada@yahoo.com
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The first time was rape and the second time might be considered consensual but for the fact you were under the age of consent which make it statutory rape in any case. Yes you lost your virginity.
How do you stop thinking about it. For one thing you need some type of closure for this boy took something from you and violated you. Most states have a five years statute of limitation on rape and maybe longer on statutory rape. If 5 years have not passed you can still charge him with rape. something you should consider for that is what happened.
When women is raped they feel they did something wrong and few ever report the rape especially a date rape like yours. I can assure you that you did nothing wrong. You were raped and you are the injured party and you should demand justice be served.
I suggest you call this number and talk with one of their counselors 1-800-656-HOPE. This is the sexual Assault Line for an organization called RAINN which stands for Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network. The call is free and totally confidential. They can offer you more help in their one on one conversation than I or we can in this medium. Call them please I know they can help you.
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Hard to digest but its clear that you have lost it and then you went back the next day again so I wont call it a rape.
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He raped you. That first time, that is was rape. You didn't consent. You said clearly no, and he did it anyways. He pushed past your 'no' because he didn't want to hear it and he pretend that because you didn't say no over and over again, because you didn't scream and kick, that it wasn't rape. It was rape. He knew you said no, and he ignored that. That is the definition of rape. You may also have been underage as well, but even if you were legally old enough to consent to sex, you didn't consent. You clearly told him you did not want to have sex. Nothing you did, or didn't do, after that meant it was okay for him to ignore your wishes. He raped you.
Maybe the next time you did it you did consent, but that doesn't mean you should hate yourself. You were confused and in pain. Lots of women stay with rapists, or keep dating rapists, or make excuses for rapists and blame themselves for what happened. A lot of time, calling a rape what it is is difficult, because most of the time a person knows their rapist, and probably thinks they are a decent person before the rape. It's a tough and terrible thing to go through. There is no perfect way to respond to it.
You need to speak to a counsellor or therapist. You deserve all the help and support in the world.
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I am so sorry this happened to you.
yes you lost your virginity and yes unfortunately he took advantage of you :(
That was your time to say no but understandably you were afraid.
Im pretty sure you cant stop thinking about it because you werent ready and because of how it happened.
We all have high expectations of our first time and lots of times its never right!
Stop beating yourself up over it!
Please forgive yourself!!! you are not a horrible person for this and you are still pure.
This was an unfortunate circumstance and it doesnt have to happen again until you are ready.
This is not worth you taking your life... you are SO much more than this.
I believe the healing will begin when you start to forgive yourself. When you think back it will hurt you but it wont be as bad. Dont let one bad situation make your life bad. We all have experienced bad things, but we learn and grow from it.
I dont know you but I know that this doesnt make you a bad person and I know that you can move past this. There is no need to keep thinking about it and allow it to ruin you and your future relationships. Dont give this guy that much credit he isnt worth it but YOU are!
wishing you all the best and a beautiful life xx
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