about

Bookworm. Dreamer. Chick Flick Fanatic. Writer. Artist. Tree Hugger. Wallflower.

I barely talk in person but I love giving advice. I might not give the best but I'm more than happy to help. :)

advice

Im 16/f and I do not get the whole fascination with dressing up, lots of makeup, dying hair etc. Like all the girls at my school are starting to wear these pretty dresses and doing their hair and they all look so beautiful..but its like i dont give a shit about any of that. Ive always been decent looking without doing a whole lot so i never really got into fashion or lots of makeup..I would like to tbh. Today i tried doing a smokey eye, and it kinda looked like shit lol. And i also tried looking up skirts and dresses that i could buy and they were all ugly and expensive. And all that stuff seems like a lot of work to keep up looking really nice everyday. I just dont get it, why is it so important? To feel good about yourself, sure but why else? I like looking nice but at the end of the day it doesnt really matter.. i dont wanna spend so much time on something that wont really get me anywhere and idk i just dont get it.

I thought of the exact same thing back when I was in high school! I even tried going to stores and trying on the clothes girls usually wear. Personally, I did not feel comfortable wearing them. Haha. Unless, it\'s for a special occasion.

Anywho, you shouldn\'t be worried about anything. You just see things differently than the girls at your school. You feel confident without trying too hard with all the make-up and stuff. But for those girls, maybe they\'re insecure or maybe they feel like they have to prove something, that\'s why they put all their time and effort in looking good.

I also think that there is something beautiful about a woman who knows what dress or make-up looks best on her because it shows knowledge and self-respect. Nevertheless, I can say the exact same thing about a woman who can feel confident about herself without feeling the need to please people around her. It shows strength and that you respect yourself enough to know that you are beautiful in your own way.

It\'s rare that I encounter girls who think like you do on this subject. I hope you won\'t ever feel the need to fit in with the crowd just because you think differently. Have a good day. :)

[view]

I've always known something was wrong with me. I had issues with self harm for a long time. I still have suicidial thoughts. I feel the need to drink and smoke when feeling down. My newest being a need to "binge eat". But I tried to stop all that, and change. It all made me hate myself more than I already do but I snapped a bit today. Just ate a take out carton full of fries, grilled cheese, two sloppy joes. a carton full of sweet potato fries and some funyuns. all within twenty minutes then popped a laxative. never ate a laxative after binging before... but I just grabbed the pack I had in my room (because I heard it was a quick weight loss technique)and did it. who knows why?

Anyway I know to get the help I need I'd have to go through my dad and I can't talk to my family. And I really mean I can't. I'm already the black sheep...and it's funny because I give advice on here and try to be there for people and i'm starting to wonder if maybe all the times I said it was going to be okay was me subconsciously trying to make myself believe that...

I know it doesn't seem like there is a question in here...i guess i kinda just needed to vent. I have no one to talk to.

Hello. I want to thank you for sending this letter. It helps to know that I wasn't the only one who felt the need to drink or smoke when I experienced depression before. I hope you will also realize that you are not alone and I hope that that realization will push you forward.

You may be the black sheep in your family but that doesn't have to define you. The fact that someone like you, someone who has his/her share of problems, still goes on this site to give advice to other people, that is beautiful.

You felt the need to drink or smoke when you were sad but you still tried to stop and change- that is willpower.

You might see yourself as someone weak but you actually are a strong person. You were brave to share your problem with a complete stranger. Thank you for trusting me with your problem. I really appreciate it. I hope this letter cheered you up somehow. Feel free to write again and I will reply as soon as I can.

[view]

I'm worried about dating and having a relationship with a guy. I feel as if I'm on the back of the bandwagon because some of my close friends have already begun dating and it worries me that I'm missing out on the chance to experience this type of thing. Is it okay to put off dating until you're much older, like in college or even as a young adult? I'm fourteen and female and would like to know before starting high school so I don't miss out on any crucial social or life learning experiences with relationships. Thanks for reading :)

I personally think that 14-16 is a little early for dating because you're at that point where you're still figuring out who you really are as a person.

People usually put off dating when they want to focus on other aspects like school or their career. It's completely normal.

You don't have to start dating just because everyone else is dating. Having a boyfriend/girlfriend should not be a status symbol.

I advice you to start dating when you feel that you're ready to face all sorts of complicated love problems.

[view]

Hi! I am a 19 year old, 3rd year college student taking up Film as my major. Nowadays, I am so very lazy to go to school and do all the school-required stuff. But I am not generally lazy. I mean, I work with my classmates for their projects and I also have an organization in my school where I commit most of my time to, but the school work itself is just so tiring and monotonous and I find no determination to do them anymore. I made it clear to myself that I need to finish school for my parents. They are a main concern. But I don't know what to do anymore. Well...I mean I really know what to do and that's to just work hard and all that but I have no clue how to start or where to get the motivation or ugh! I don't knoooww!

I used to feel the same way back when I was in my senior year in high school, up to the point where I got so depressed and I didn't even want to live anymore because the whole thing kinda felt pointless. Anyway, I got to talk to a priest and I got my motivation after thinking about all the people that I can help once I get a job.

Since you're taking up film, just think about how happy people will be when they see your films! You can even help pay for a relative's studies and you can finally give back to your parents as a way of being thankful. Hope this helps. :)

[view]

So I have this guy friend and he has asked me if I could sleep over his house, we are best friends but my mom always says " Absolutely not!". Why is she not letting me. I really want to sleep over his house but my mom is like WAY OVER PROTECTIVE. Any way I can convince her to let me stay the night. ANYTHING WILL DO! Please like HELP ME!

Don't take it too personally. Most parents can be overprotective nowadays. They can trust their kid(s) and even their kid's friends but they can never trust the type of world we are living in right now- a world where teen pregnancy is very rampant. Wouldn't you do the same if you were a mother?

[view]

I got asked out in school on Wendsday and he's my first boyfriend and I don't know what to do! I'm really shy. I really like him but since I don't know what to do I'm scared he'll break up with me.. HELP!

I was in a pretty similar situation last year when I had my first boyfriend. When we went to a ball, I was so nervous like, really nervous. I kept looking away and I couldn't even maintain eye contact. He thought I didn't like him anymore but I talked to him and explained how I was so nervous because I had no idea how I should act as a girlfriend. The talk we had helped us understand each other and we are still together. :)

Break the ice by letting him know that you're happy to have your first boyfriend but at the same time you're so nervous because you've never been in a relationship. He'll probably appreciate it if you tell him because he won't get confused. Be honest. After all, he is your boyfriend. Don't be afraid to show him who you really are. :)

Just enjoy every minute. Young love is so cute but it can be complicated too just like any other relationship. Nevertheless, don't let your worries ruin your moments! :)

[view]

I'm a 13 year old female and my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 3 months and we never kissed! My boyfriend and I really only see each Other at the roller rink, he volunteers there with his friends. But I really wanna kiss him, but I don't know how to escpically since it's gonna be crowed. Any tips you could give me on how to kiss him and I'd its a good idea? Thanks

Considering your age, I think it's best not to rush things. Enjoy being young and enjoy every amount of innocence you still have in you because, you're going to miss it when you get older.

I don't think it's that big of a problem that you guys haven't kissed yet. Unless, it's causing damage to your relationship. If you two are happy at where you are right now, keep it at that. You have your whole life ahead of you. Kisses are the best when they happen at the right time with the right person.

But then again, kissing is an expression of love. If you really can't help it, go ahead. Just don't go too far. Act your age and know your limits. If you need anything else, you can go to my advice column. :)

[view]

how do you spank a child what position and what implemet

I would not recommend spanking as a disciplinary measure because the child might grow up to be someone who only follows rules out of fear. Instead of spanking, maybe you could just ban things like playtime and candies until he learns to behave.

[view]

What make you happy?

- having someone who loves me back
- knowing that I'm actually doing things right
- being accepted for who I am

It's the little things. :)

[view]

<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>
eXTReMe Tracker