about

hey advicenators, my name is caitlin. i love giving people advice. i`ve had a previous advice column, but decided to quit giving advice. i regretted that and got a new column! this pretty much became my obession very fast. im on basically everyday, at least once. i never reject any questions that i get in my inbox, because i think that no question is stupid. when i do get questions in my in my inbox, it makes my day :]! remember that i cant see who you are. so you shouldnt feel embarassed to ask me anything! also just because i have my three favorite categories doesn`t mean that im not open to answer any other types of questions. i love getting feedback. it lets me know that im doing my job well! every question that i do ask on this site always gets rated. i mean you have to know if your giving good advice or not, right? if you do like my advice, feel free to add me as one of your favorite columnists!

advice

Well I have this friend we will call her D, and she is like SO awesome and I LOVE hanging out with her! But D is has a bestfriend(not me were just good friends but im her 2nd bff) her bff treats her like dirt. I dont want to tell her because she will probably get mad at me or something.

And D sometimes treats me that way too because i guess she is use to having people treat her like that but whenever I say anything to her about it shes always like "Chill Im just kidding" but shes sooo mean when she does it!

So what do I do//Tell her?

hey, i think you should tell her. if you leave it this way then its just going to get worse and maybe even develop into her ignoring you 24/7 and you guys losing your friendship. if you tell her and she wont cahnge for you then she is NOT really your friend. i hope all goes well for you.
-missadvicebitch1

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okay so me and my best friend are still really close but she has become friends with a different friend group and i would really much so want to be friends with them. i guess you could say they were the "punk/emo" kids. i talk to a few but whenever i'm around them when i'm with my bf i don't really talk. i get like shy and block myself out. i feel like anti social. what do i say to them to start like becoming friends. i've never really had to try to become friends with anyone like this. it just kind of happened for me. help.

hey, alright well with me if i talk to someone on aim for a few days first it gets easier to talk to them in person. also when your on aim there are no akward silences. if there is a pause you can just say brb and then think of somethng to talk to them about and then say im back.
-missadvicebitch1

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okay so for halloween, i was having a few friends over and we were going to go to six flags. but one of them couldnt go because she was already "going with her family" and 2 other ones bailed out the last minute to go with her. before we left to leave, i asked my friend why she invited the other 2 since we could've all gone together, and she flat out told me off and called me a b**** for not hanging out with them! now i admit that since high school started (we're freshman!) i've been busy. im in choir, dance, the school vb team, and soccer.. and well these 3, but mostly the 1st girl, really have nothing to do as far as extra-curricular. she's fat and often gives me trouble about how thin i am. i was very upset because we used to be real close, but i got over it and left ready to have fun. when we saw them there, they waved to the other girls and shot me dirty looks. now at school the main girl is getting people mad at me, but if i run into them or something, they ask me why im mad at them! i've found out that at least 6 people were mad at me, because this girl told them i was mad at them!! do you think she's just jealous or something? shes trying to make my life a living hell.. and it's only worked a tiny bit. she even told my boyfriend / bestfriend that im a slut, a b****, and possibly cheating on him!? well, i need advice on what to do, im trying to ignore it but i think i might be too shy to tell her off or anything! HELP!!!

get revenge. i know its not the right thing to do usually but in this case i think you should. give it right back to her. tell people that shes mad at them. try to break up her and her boyfriend, if she has one. do all the things possible to make her life a living hell. let her know that your the wrong person to mess with.
-missadvicebitch1

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might be long but i would apreciate help.

Last year one of my friends moved far away, a couple changed to different school and i dont see them much anymore, and another i just grew apart from and stopped talking to her. That was alot of loses at once, but i had other friends so it wasnt to hard. A month or so ago my boyfriend broke up with me and then there was lots of "drama" and i lots another good majority of my friends that i dont only talk to in school. So it left me with just one good true friend. but lately i feel like im losing her too. We have been getting in fights, not agreeing and hardly hanging out. She goes out a ton with a group of friends i use to be in, but lately have seemd to just be excluded from. I always try to make plans to do things but poeple are always bussy or say no. Its making me really sad and i've been crying alot, and people who know me know idont cry im always a happy person. The only person i have is my one friend and she is the one who moved. Its pathetic that i have stayed best friends and grew closer with the one friend that moved and i cant even keep the friends near me. This is gettin long so ill get to my question. What should i do. With the one girl who i feel is leaving me out, i dont wanna talk to her and have her get mad and then have nobody. Pleasee help me any advice! i need it.

=(

i would suggest talking to her. it might make things worse but i think thats it worth the shot. if you continue not talking to her about it you guys might just grow apart even more. keeping all your feelings botteled yup insdide doenst help out the situation either.
-missadvicebitch1

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i have to plan two surprise parties in december/january. i don't know if i can have them in my house, because i don't like having guys in my house (they would be guy/girl) with my parents and stuff, i dont know its just annoying. for one, my friend offered to have it at her house (maybe). but is there somewhere we could like go that i could have it? besides a resturant, somewhere where we could like hang out and have music maybe...that wouldn't cost too much money?

you could rent a hall for it. also you could make it a backyard party. that way your parents wouldnt be so clingy.
-missadvicebitch1

HOPEFULLY YOULL SEE THISS!
HALLS ARE DIFFERNT AMOUNTS OF MONEY DEPENDING ON WHERE YOUR LOOKING TO HAVE IT. IT DOESNT HAVE TO BE ANYTHING TO TO NICE, CONSIDERING ITS ONLY TEENAGERS.

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my friend's birthday is coming up, i want to give her a really good present because she always gets me really good stuff, having to do with our like inside jokes and suchh. any ideas?

you could get a cute picutre of you too and put a frame around it that says like best friends or something. even get an engraved on that says like your names and then bestfriends since whenerver you met. then go on paint on your computer and make little word bubbles near your mouths and make it say one of your insdie jokes. =].
-missadivcebitch1

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I am 13 years old. I am in grade 8 and life is getting somplicated. Almost all my friends are guys and now the most popular girl in school say I flirt a lot with all the guys. She spread a nickname for me called "Boy Toy" and now I cant talk to a guy without anyone making a big deal about it. One of my most trustworthy friends is a guy and ill admit I kind of like him now but its just too weird. But now shes got even my best friend believing I flirt with him all the time and hes starting to avoid me some more. What I mean is usually when we see eachother he gives me a giant smile and stuff and stops and talks to me. Now he like looks away. I dont know what to do. Its not like im a huge flirt (I think) Ive never even truely gone out with a guy. What should I do?

just shake it off. think about it. if the boys didnt stop talking to you would it really be a problem? i dont think it would be. anyways so what if your a flirt. its cute to be a flirt. if the guys stop talking to you then there losers. you should talk to them about it and see what happens from there.
-missadvicebitch1

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this girl is my "best friend. except for she trys to be cool and a lot of people do notice. shse claims she "hates" the cool but then trys to hang out with them (which i dont get) my other best friend told me she was talking about me during lunch lieing a bout me like how im so bosy (because i asked her to save me a seat today!?) and other stuff but my other best friend wasnt paying attention. what doi do about her? if i ignored her shed be like i didnt do anything? i kno its true tho because my other best friend is like truthful and wouldnt lie about that stuff. (i know) what do i say!? ahhh its hard becuze its cool when were alone shell act normal but if the cool kids are around shell ditch me ITS FINE THO IF SHES JUST WITH ME SHE WILL ACT NORMAL! (i made it bigger because i thought its kinda importanat)
like last year a cool kid took my seat and im like can you please move i was sitting there and shes like NO. and i couldnt pull a seat up because the table was packed. so i moved. she did not stand UP for me she just laughed with that girl the WHOLE time and when she left, my "best frined" came up to me and as like "whats wrong? im like ARE YOU SEARIOUS i was sitting ALONE basically with kids i barley knew and dont talk to , and shse asks me whats the matter? just other stuff like that. (trys to be cool=obvious) PLEASE HELP

well if she doesnt stand up for you when the cool kids are around then it seems that shes embarassed to be with you. notice that shes fine with you when your ALONE and with NO ONE else. shes fine with you because no one is seeing you with her. she isnt a good freidn to you. you should tell her how you feel and if she doesnt want to change for you just end the friendship. i know its going to be hard but its for the best for you. youll get hurt more and more by her if you dont end it if shes not willing to chcange. she wasnt a true friend to you and it looks like she enver will be. try to find antoerh group of loyal friends. goodluck. let me know how eveything thing goes. keep your head up high.
-missadvicebitch1

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I hate my friends, i have a little group of friends and ther names are kiera,karrie,chloe and danielle. Danielle was moved into our class because we have moved up to high school and she wasn't put with anyone she liked, anyway Danielle is taking kiera away from me now because when we have to work in pairs chloe goes with carrie and keira goes with danielle so i am left out, i have to go and work with the least popular person in the school.
I am not popular at all and i am not a total reject but my question is how can i get keira to be my friend again and be best friends with me? should i even bother?

well sometimes people click better with other people. sometimes people will always be bestfriends with someone. it seems to me that kierra used you when danielle wasnt there. you cant break apart best friends. try making new friends or just explain to all of them how you feel.
-missadvicebitch1

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ok yesterday i said to my friend jess on aim "i officially have the best song on my myspace ever." i told her to go look and shes like "that song sucks." it was "but its better if you do" by panic at the disco. then shes like "dude, stop trying to be like me and katie cuz its not working. you hated them like a month ago." katie is one of our friends. she also said i get jealous over the smallest things and its really annoying. is she like way overreacting? because all me friends think she is.

and another thing..how can i not get so jealous? because i do get jealous easily.

she seems to be the jealous one to me. think about it tho, do you really try to act like her and katie? if you do then try to find some originality in yourself. you dont have to act like people to get people to like you. just be yourself.
-missadvicebitch1

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Ok, theres this guy that I'e been talking to at school and we both talk about things that we both like and he's really nice and great to talk to. We would flirt innocently even though I have a b/f which I kept telling him after he kept making sexual remarks towards me. Then he started acting a little less like a friend and more like he was intresested in me and kept asking me when I'll dump my boyfriend. Now he's acting really immature and talks obviously trying to make me jealous by mentioning some girl that he likes to someone next to me. And he made a sexual remark to me the other day which i just anwsered by saying "Wouldnt you like to know" and he said "No...Ive moved on!" LOL I dont understand why hes so desperate to not be single and have a g/f and why he has to be immature and rude to me just beacause I wont break up with my faithful boyfriend of a year which I definitly think I see a future with. Should I stop talking to him altogether? Is there only one way he'll see me as and never as a friend? Why do we stop talking to people that we can't have? Why dont we accept what they've decided and who've they picked? Isnt it better to have someone as a friend rather than nothing at all?

i dont think that hes desperate for a girlfriend. i think that he just likes you very much! if you dont feel the same way about him - which you dont seen to, explain that to him. let him know taht you guys cant be friends if hes going to keep talking sexually to you and harassing you about breaking up with the love of your life.
-missadivcebitch1

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ok im 13/f
so ive was friends with this girl for maybe a year. last year we were really close. shes really nice but shes the kind of person that sucks up to everyone to be everyones friend. over the course of last year we got into some fights but not a big deal, towards the end of the year she did horrible things to me, she told this girl alll my secrets, and talked behind my back. so then after that i told her i can't trust her anymore and i still mean it. she forgave me and then i gave her a 2nd chance. it happened again and i told her that i couldnt be friends with her anymore. that summer she didn't really talk to me but i didnt care. this school year shes acting as though im her best friend and trying to tag along with me and my new friends. my friends don't care for her so much but they dont want to be mean.

i officially don't want her in my life..but she won't stop talking to me. she IMs me all the time, talks to me in school.. and i say hi back to be nice but i give her the could shoulder but she doesnt get the picture !!!

what do i say/do to her that will keep her away from meee ?!

it seems like youve made new friends and moved on with your life - without her. explain to her that you were serious when you said you didnt want to be friends with her. maybe she didnt take it seriosuly. politely tell her that your not enemies, but your not friends either.
-missadvicebitch1

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