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This may be long and I will try and not confuse you. My parent got a divorce like 2 years ago and are still going to court and everything for money cause my dad didnt pay for awhile ( he got caught up in drugs and had a lot of crack whores at his house, friend married one and also his friends son almost got shot cause a bunch of blacks *not offense but these people should be dead* wanted drug money or something) anyways i wanted them to get a divorce cause how i see it i dont have a dad. A dad isnt a person your scared when he comes home and u have packed extra clothes for when you get sick of it and run away again. *wow this sounds like a sob story* well we didnt talk for almost two years until i stupidly bought him and christmas gift and had a friend bring me over to his house he bought. He wanted me to blow off my friend and stay with him (he is an alcoholic and was on the verge of getting abusive again) so finally as politly as i could i told him that i already had plans and had to leave. we traded numbers (i hate being rude) and he called a few times i really didnt answere them. then after about 6 months he calls up to tell me he is dying 6 months to a year he has left to live. yeah i know i should be spending every moment with him. that night we went out i had an ok time he made me drive :( then while eating he tells me i need to lose about 20 pounds (im 145 but really athletic and used to be anorexic when i was little) did i also mention i start smoking ciggerates and cutting myself at 8 and drinking around 9. ive stop smoking i cant allow myself to be addicted to something and i dont drink as much. ok maybe i added stuff that dont belong but im trying to show what all im going through. Nows my question *finally* should i start talking to my dad again since he's dying but when we talk all i heard is whats your mother saying about me, why wont you come over im dying, let do this cause im dying. now i sound cold hearted. Any thoughts would really help im so freaking confused. sorry its so long.
ok i can feel ya, totally on this. but it's not my story i'm sharing here. this is about YOU. and thats what you need to realize. its not about your dad, its about you and your hapiness. if you have a gut feeling about your dad than dont go. spend a little time with him just so you dont regret it later, think about your feelings when you grow up, will you feel good about the time you spent with him? dont go any where privite with him where u might feel scared. have your mom drive you to a resturant meet him tehre than have a time for her to pick you up. keep your cell phone or something on you at all times to make you feel safer and like you have a back-up. when i was little, and i had this sort of problem, in my bag, i'd take something that made me feel safe, and warm and pack it in there and just reemember its with me to make me feel not so alone. if you have anymore questions. i'm here for you, message me anytime...
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my mom and 2 brothers and 1 moved in with my grandma and aunt. they treat us like crap! my mom is so depressed i try to stop the fight i do but then 4 sec. laster my grandma will open her mouth again and its non stop fighting and i stick up 4 my mom and shes is always upset and it bothers me .. my life my mom and my 2 brothers life r not right here and were tryin our best to move but we cant yet cuz we dont have enough money.. but my mom is soo upset here.. im tried of all the fighting but i cant stop it my grandma thinks she does nothin worng and its all my mom and that also makes my mom upset.. what should i do to help? what should my mom do? and what can we do to stop the fighting? p/s we tell them to leave our stuff alone but they dont and thet ruein our clothes in the laundry cu the ammonia and we say were gonna wash our clothes but they wash ours neway... what can i do??
Ashley
13
female
aww hun, i'm sorry your in this situation. dont yell @ anyone though because its pointless and it isnt going to help in anyway to make things better. your grandma understood why your mom and you guys needed to move in there, she should understand how shes hurting your feelings. no matter how hard it is, you need to talk to her, and maybe your aunt too. catch them when there in a good mood, and ask if you can talk to them. i know this is harder than it sounds and a little on the cheesy side, but im sure it'll make things better. if it gets worse..ask for advice to me again because im sure the situation will change after you talk to them. give it a try, it wont hurt you!! xo andrea
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