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Q: my boyfriend and i have been dating for over a year now. i'm 15 and he is 17. i really do like him but i'm not in love with him. so my first question is...should i be in love with him by now or should i quit wasting my time with him?? i don't wanna break up with him because i really do like him though. and my next one is he has lately been talking about sex a lot. He tried it about 6 months ago but i told him i wasn't ready. he then said okay thats fine we will wait till you are. so i'm still not ready and he is wanting it bad. i really don't wanna lose him to another girl for sex. i would rather lose him because there isn't a strong enough connection than to lose him to lies and sex. You know what i mean?? anyways hwat should i do about this??
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As for the question about loving him.
It takes time. I'm not saying you should end it because you don't, but people get to the point where they love someone at a different rate. It doesn't just happen over a set period of time.
I'm actually really glad you said you don't love him, because a lot of people think that because they are dating someone, they are obligated to love them.
And the sex thing. Just tell him you're not ready again. If he really likes you, he'll respect that and wait until you are ready. You shouldn't be being pressured about that. If he keeps doing it, honestly, I think you should break it off. No one should be pressured into doing something if they don't want to, and especially if they don't think they're ready. And don't give into the pressure unless you're positive you're ready. Don't do anything you're not comfortable with.
If he goes to another girl for sex, then I say it's his loss, because he's losing a girl with good moral values. You may be sad at first if you two break up because of this, but you'll realize that there's someone out there who respects you enough to wait, and you'll be glad you did.
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Q: im really like sad i guess.. to the point of crying. and its just so messed up. im 15/f - first of all, it just feels like everyone aruond me is getting a boyfriend or has one, and if they dont have one, they're talking to a guy they might like and that lieks them. no one likes me. idont know why. it just really bums me out, because i know i would be so happy if i had a boyfriend or a guy i liked and don't tell me"oh it will all come in time" or "they should like you for you" or wahtever. just please help me.. how can i talk to guys more, so i can like get a boyfriend or start liking someone or get someone to like me. how can i get more confidence and be more "flirty" and just show that i'm out there and looking or whatever?
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Well, before you can be happy with someone else, you have to be happy with yourself. I'm not saying you HAVE to be happy about being single, but you have to believe in yourself, which I guess brings us to confidence. What parts of yourself are you not confident in? Try to improve those. If it's looks, try working out. It makes me feel more confident in myself. If it's like social skills, just try talking to people. Anywhere. At school if you're standing by someone who has nothing better to do, just say "Hey how are you?" Get to the point where you're comfortable talking to different people, and then if you like a guy, just approach him. Say hi. Start a conversation. Compare interests. Ask him what kind of music he likes, if he has any siblings, even if you already know the answers. It starts conversation. As for flirting. Be touchy. Not like slutty touchy, but like, touch his arm when you're talking, push him playfully when you're joking around. Smile a lot.
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bio
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Hmm, where to begin? Well, My name is Melanie. You can call me whatever you'd like, as long as it somehow relates to my name =]
I'm just about your average teenage girl. I'm boy crazy and I love to have fun. I'm really laidback and open-minded. I love to listen (or read, in this case). No question is stupid, so ask away. If you want to talk one on one, email or IM me, or hell, you can even talk to me on myspace. I'm usually by the computer, but if I'm not, I'll get back to you. Promise.
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Info
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Website: E-mail: Gender: Female Location: Texas Age: 15 AIM: MSN: cylindercow@hotmail.com Member Since: May 18, 2007 Answers: 10 Last Update: June 3, 2007 Visitors: 2255
Main Categories:
Favorite Columnists
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