Bio♥
Hey, I'm Melody! I've been giving advice on and off since 2003. I'm a 23 year old military wife, expecting a baby boy in August, and working on my Bachelor's degree. :)
Oh, and ask me anything!
Advice
13/f. My ex boyfriend is 14. He broke up with me last week and I got upset because he just said that he was going to high school and I will still be in middle school and I was to little for him and that stuff what ever excuse's!!!.. This was before -- My best friend use to like him so did I and when he asked me out. I asked her if it would be okay for her and she won't get upset with it. She said it's fine as long as I'm happy. And yesterday I saw him the second time after he broke up with me. My best friend and my other friend we're with me. Let's call my best friend P and my other friend E. Me and E let P talk to these guy's. So me and E we're just walking around, but my ex was with P and the other guy's. After P was done talking to the guy's and E left. P told me that my ex asked if I was mad at him adn P said yes I was. It's true. And then my ex told P that this was all her fault that we broke up. And that got me more upset too. And when me and P we're walking I saw my ex. And he asked me why is everyone mad at him [talking about my friend's as everyone] and then I said I don't know maybe because they want to be. And then he said are you mad at me. I said no duh I'm mad at you. You expect me to be all happy after you break up with me and you tell my best friend it was her fault that you broke up with me. And he didn`t say anything and walked away. Sorry I wrote alot I just wanted you to understand the story. But in your acvice why do you think he blamed P for us breaking up? And why does he expect me to happy after all this? Does it seem like he still have feeling's for me. Thank you for taking you time to read this.
I think he broke up with you because he's confused. He's getting ready to start highschool and everything is going to be changing in his life soon. He's growing up, and he's just simply confused. Guys go through these weird stages where they don't know what they want to do with there lives at that age, and they don't know if they want a girlfriend. They just basically don't know anything. These stages may last a few days, a few weeks, a month, or maybe longer. It's hard to tell. He probably blamed your friend because he needed a scape goat. Someone to blame his actions on because he don't know why he did it to begin with. I say go on with your life. If he doesn't even know if he has feelings for you still, how am I going to tell you?
I was rated a ♥
I`m 12/f and I already have 8 boyfriend`s this past year. And I don`t want to have like 15 at the end of the year I`m turning 13 in 4 month`s. I just can`t help myself because well to me the guy`s that are alway`s asking me out are REALLY hot. And all the guy`s I went out with are older then me. Like 13 - 14. We only made out, hold hand`s, hug, that stuff nothing sexual. I`m still a virgin but then I get these urge`s to go more farther then that. Is there anyway for me to stop getting urge`s because I`m afraid one of these day`s I`m going to slip and lose my virginity. And I want to wait till I`m 14 to lose it. Please Help me I don`t want to make a mistake that I`m going to regret later. Please. And thank you.
It's fine to have a boyfriend, no matter what your age. My brother is only 10, and he's had more girlfriends this past year than i've had boyfriends my whole life. As long as you aren't being sexual, and you aren't dating these boys at the same time, it's fine.
If you don't want to have sex, then don't. Find your limit, and don't go further than it. Don't pick out an age to lose your virginity, lose it when you are ready and you find a boyfriend who you can see yourself spending the rest of your life with.
I was rated a ♥
15.f hi i am with my boyfriend for a while now and we have had sex several times. he feels great and loves it. but we both cant figure out why it doesnt feel good for me. like it feels ok but i can never reach orgasm?? i want to and i try to, but i feel like having sex doesnt work for me. there has to be a reason so if u could help?? thanks so much
A lot of girls don't orgasm from intercourse, so it's neither you or your boyfriend's fault. Make sure you are turned on during sex, and have him play with your clitoris during sex. You'll probably orgasm from clitoral stimulation if you don't from intercourse.
I was rated a ♥
I'm still a virgin and when I finger myself with 3 finger's it doesn't hurt at all. And I walk perfect and I don't get sore. It feel's good actually. Do you think if I keep fingering myself with 3 finger's I loosen up for sex and it won't hurt that much or alot?
You must be a wide-set girl. As long as you are turned on when having sex for the first time, it won't hurt you. You don't have to keep fingering yourself, unless you just want to.
I was rated a ♥
Do you know any song's that are R&&B that relate to someone breaking up with you, but can't get them out of your mind. If you do then can you tell me a few. please. and thank you.
I'm not THAT into music. I listen to it a lot, but don't know as much as about it as others. I have some break up songs that I'll give you, but 2 columnists that could help you way better than I could would be "karisue" and/or "Tina_Duh" =]
Avirl Lavigne: My Happy Ending & When Your Gone
Cauterize: Choke & I'll Cry Tommorow
Chris Daughtry: It's Not Over & Over You
Diamond Rio: Your Gone
Dixie Chicks: Cold Day in July & You Were Mine
Evanescence: My Immortal
Fall Out Boy: Thanks For The Memories
Fergie: Big Girls Don't Cry
There is a few.
I was rated a ♥
Does girl cum taste like guy cum?
I wouldn't know. I've never tasted it.
I was rated a ♥
Do you think it's wierd that I get really horny when I give my boyfriend a hand/blow job? I love it when he get's turned on. And then I get turned on by it.
No, it's not weird at all because I do as well. It's good that you get enjoyment from him being pleasured. =]
I was rated a ♥
I don't know what category to pick.
13/f. When I was 10 I was at the playground and when I was going up this thing that had pole's but sideway's that you climb on. And I slipped and my vagina fell on the pole. It hurt alot and it hurt every time I went to the bathroom but it's all good now. [sorry if it sound's confusing] Do you think I ripped my hymen?
It's a very good possibility. It's kind of hard to be sure, but usually things like that can and will do it. The hymen is technically the only thing being a "virgin" consists of, but lots of virgins don't have one. They deteriorate over time, and some are completely gone by the age of 13 or 14. So it really doesn't matter if you have one or not, so don't worry. I don't know when or how I ripped mine? And I really don't care.
I was rated a ♥
15/f.
Me and my booyfriend really care for each other. And I can trust him. Ok but I'm going to give him a blow job and when I'm going "down there" do i unbutton his pant's or does he? haha. I know this sound's really stupid. I just need you opinion. What do you think?
Either one. Once you guys get ready to just be like, "are you going to unsip them or not?" kind of flirty i guess. it doesn't really matter.
I was rated a ♥
i'm 15 years old. i've been with my boyfriend for 7 months and i'm on birthcontrol pills. we dont use condoms because we are eachothers first. i wanted to know if when we have sex after he ejaculates if i should leave it inside or if i should wash it? if so what do i use to clean up and how?
What do you usually do?
It's usually hard to leave it inside of you. Once he ejaculates, if it's a lot then it's probably going to come out of you whether you want it to or not. Always keep a towel beside you after sex, and wipe yourself. Go straight to the bathroom and pee. This will keep you from getting a blatter infection as well, so always pee after sex. Try and push some of it out, after that wipe again. Always keep a pantiliner in your underwear just in case. It'll probably come out of you every now and then for a few ours up to a day. It's not like in the movies, huh? It's very unromantic, but that's just how it is.
I was rated a ♥
I'm 13 female.
Me and my boyfriend make out but I get tired of doing it really quick. And I tell him that but I
want to go longer because I want it to be nice expirence for me and him. First question. Do you think it's wierd that i stop really quick. Second question. Is there anything for I can get turned on [as people say] or go longer? thank you.
If you get tired of something and don't feel like doing it anymore, tell him. If it's not enjoyable for you, then it's probably not enjoyable for him. As for getting turned on, if you aren't enjoying the situation then it's hard to do this. Also, when you get turned on there's a chance of going further than just making out. Your 13 years old, and by taking that chance you're risking doing other more sexual things before you are prepared. Kiss him because you love him and enjoy his company, instead of kissing him for "pleasure" or whatnot.
I was rated a ♥
i`m a guy and 14. & i`m still a virgin. me and my girlfriend are going to have sex on saturday. when we`re doing it is there a way to tell that she is still a virgin?
Why would you want to? Whether or not she's a virgin should have nothing to do with why you would want to have sex with her, or why you wouldn't. There's technically no way to tell whether a girl is a virgin or not for a number of reasons. If she's a bigger girl, she'll have a bigger vagina. If she's smaller well, you get the point. You may be able to tell if her hymen is ripped (aka, cherry is popped) but that may have already happened for a number of reasons. It could have happened from putting in a tampon, riding a horse, being fingered, anything that put pressure or penetration on a vagina can rip your hymen. If you really want to know, how experienced she is may be an indication. Or if she's an incredibly tiny girl, and has a very "loose" for lack of a better world, vagina then maybe you should ask her. Either way, you shouldn't care.
I was rated a ♥
my bf wants to eat me out and like im fine with it and all but wat should i do in order to prepare myself? Like shower? or how much should i shave or wat? ok thanks
Oral sex is an uncomfortable thing, especially for girls. You could be a married couple, and still be uncomfortable with it. The situation puts you in a very vulnerable position, especially if you are young female and unprepared for it. If you have to ask these questions, then you shouldn't be doing it to begin with.
But to answer your question, you probably should shower beforehand. Don't wash yourself on the inside with soap. You have good and bad bacteria, and unfortunately soap kills both. If you kill the good bacteria that actually keeps you clean, you'll stink. Just wash the outside area with soap, and run the shower water on the inside. Actually I read in a book or article somewhere that what you eat, effects the way you, for lack of a better word, taste. If you eat stinky foods, you could possibly stink down there. Strange I know, and i'm not sure how reliable the article source was, but hey! More tips that couldn't hurt, right? As for shaving, do what you normally do. Trim yourself up a little if you don't usually, just to be considerate. But don't change your entire body image for the satisfaction of a guy. Dur.
I was rated a ♥
whenever i go to the bathroom it hurt my lower stomach and is really uncomfortable for awhile after that. and i know this is gross, but my pee is cloudy and has a weird smell to it. if i drink alot of water it helps. I have had sex before but i know that the person i had sex with doesn't have an STD. What could be wrong?
I've had that happen to me before. It could be a Urinary Tract Infection, Bladder Infection, or something. Your cloudy pee means you are drinking to much pop, or not enough water. Does it smell kind of like sugar smacks? I bet that's what it is. You need to go the doctor and drink plenty of water. =]
I was rated a ♥
I want to get my cartilage done but my mom is extremly against it since there is a high risk of infection. I'm willing to pay for the piering, take the time to clean it and get a small silver ball so it's not highly visable. I would get it done at a doctors office so theres a less chance of infection but I'm not sure if they do cartilage piercings. I don't know if its that she thinks this piercing will lead to other ones, it looks trashy or she thinks it will get infected. I want to convince her its not for any of those reasons and that there are ways to have your cartilage done and have it not look trashy. (Like by wearing small studs) I have two piercings on each side and don't intend on having anything more done than my cartilage. I just need help convincing her about this. I'm 15/f btw.
Cartlidge piercings aren't trashy, whether you where a small stud, or a hoop. Though I wouldn't reccomend it. Haha. Anyways, a piercing parlor is just as professional and clean as a doctor, if not more so because they specialize in piercings. Show your mom pictures of the piercing on google, and explain to her you are more than willing to take care of it. It's just an ear piercing. Seriously. Make her understand that.
I was rated a 5 ♥
kay i guess these are typical highschool questions but PLEASE answer them.
- what should I bring on the 1st day?
- Should I carry a backpack or a messenger bag type thing?
- Is it easy to find your classes? If not, any tips?
- On the 1st day we have lunch. Should I buy my lunch or bring it in a paper bag?
- Where should I sit at lunch cause I DONT KNOW ANYBODY!?
- I am taking a sort of remediate math. What are the people like in remediate classes? Are they all druggies and such?
- For the 1st sememster, are your classes the same, in the same order, every day?
ok, thankyou.
1. If you already know your schedule, and what your classes are, then what you bring is pretty self explanatory. I know I have three classes this first semester, so i'm bringing three binders, three packs of paper, a pack of pens and pencils, a calculator, and dividers. If you need anything else, your teachers will let you know on the first day. (Bring a little notebook or something with you to jot down what you will need)
2. It's really up to you. My freshman and sophomore year I brought just a regular backback, but this year I bought this messenger bag: http://www.verabradley.com/Site/Store/ProductDetail.aspx?Sku=121PAS07&
3. It depends on how big your school is. Mine is fairly small, and I did have a hard time finding my classes. I would just ask a teacher I seen, or a friend I knew in the hallways.
4. I've always ate my lunch at school. To much of a hassle to pack a bag.
5. Sit with the first person you see, or make a friend earlier in the day, and be like "you want to eat lunch together tonight.
6. Are you a druggie? If not, what makes you think everyone else in there will be? Don't be so stereotypical.
7. At my school it is. It may be different at yours.
I was rated a ♥
I really really want to be popular and I get so jealous at all of the pretty, popular, perfect gurls. How can I overcome this jealousy?
I honestly don't think that a single person knows the definition of the word "popular" anymore.
"Regarded with great favor, approval, or affection especially by the general public."
Being popular doesn't mean you have nice clothes, a pretty face, and a small group of good looking friends, it means people LIKE you. Obviously you don't like these people, and i'm sure that you aren't the only one.
The kind of people you are discussing are nothing more than snobs. I don't see why you would be jealous of this kind of person anyway, but to put things simply, don't be. You don't want to be like that. Because in all honesty, no one will like you.
I was rated a ♥
I'm a 16 year old female and I have been dating a boy for about 3 years, we are very close and really care about each other. We are also about to move in together in a few months. But i also have this other guy he was my first love and i dont think we ever truly let go of one another. The other weekend he and i went camping with some friends and we got alot closer it feels as though we rekindle that old flame. I love my current boyfriend alot and dont want to lose or hurt him but when im with this other boy i feel that same love for him.
What should i do?
Someone please help.
Signed,
Confused Heart
:]
You'll always have feelings for your first love, it's nearly impossible not to. But are you sure it's the same feelings you felt for him when you dated? It could be a diffent kind of love you are feeling for him. Are you sure this boy still has feelings for you as well? If he doesn't, then what's the point in getting your hopes up? I'm sure you are a smart girl, so ask yourself: do you honestly think there is a chance this old relationship will start up again after one night? Or that this guy has feelings for you in any kind of relationship sort of way?
Did you cheat on your current boyfriend? Do you regret what you did? If so you need to tell him. If you love him it's not fair to either of you to keep this from him. I'm sure you love your boyfriend, you've been dating for THREE YEARS, and that's a long time to stay with someone you are questioning. Think long and hard about the situation you are in, and decide who you want to be with. You obviously know you can't have both, so choose which one you can see yourself with 10, 15, or even 20 years from now. I think you'll make the right decision.
I trust that you'll talk to your boyfriend about the situation you are in, because secrets always have a way of coming out. To end this on a very serious note, be careful who you have sexual relationships with. Even if you think the area you are in is STD safe, you could be wrong. Always use protection and common sense.
I was rated a ♥
i was with this guy once, bob and we did some stuff, and when he fingered me, it hurt, really bad. like i cried for an hour after. and i dont know if it's because i had a bad time then, but my almost boyfriend and me did stuff last night, he fingered me and it felt good, but nothing really happened besides it feeling good, nothing earth shattering like everyone always talks about .. i dont know if there's something wrong with me, or how to handle it. i feel like im gonna make him mad causenothing happens.
The first time sometimes does hurt. The second or third time may even hurt. But eventually it does start feeling good. Sexual stimulation does feel good, but it's not THAT wonderful. It feels good, yeah but that's it. Orgasms on the other hand are great. Once again, maybe not earth shattering, but great =]
You aren't weird and i'm sure he understands. If he gets mad, leave him. He obviously wasn't worth it.
I was rated a 5 ♥
ok i have 2 questions plz answer both( there kinda weird but i need to no)
1: where do you put in a tampon i no its in your vigina but wear in it??
2: if i put it in doesnt it mean like im not a virgin anymore because if you put it in its like i dont know but if you no what i mean then please tell me
P>S my mom says that im still to young ot use one so i dont no if i should and i hate pads ..
14/f
1. You're right you do put the tampon in your vagina. You have 3 holes down there. The part you pee out of, your butt, and the hole in between. That's your vagina. There is only one way you can put it in. There is a picture diagram in the box of tampons that will be of a lot of help the first few times using tampons.
2. No, you are still a virgin if you use a tampon. Your hymen may rip (which can happen during sexual activity, or something else) but you are still very much a virgin. Until a penis enters your vagina, you are a virgin.
If you think you are ready to wear tampons, tell your mom why you don't like wearing pads. Maybe she will listen.
I was rated a 5 ♥