Wife, mother, loyal friend to the end, model, classic car collector. almost 30 years old, and seen alot in my few years here on earth. People usually come to me for advice, and i give in return grounded, realistic answers.
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Dragonflymagic
adviceman49
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Okay. So I had a girlfriend who I was dating for three weeks (I'm a thirteen year old girl by the way) I know it was a short time but I had been crushing on her for ages and I was (maybe still am?) in love with her. She has a friend who she was close with, too close with, out of school with texting and stuff it was fine. But at school her friend (everyone in this situation is a girl, this is at an all girls school) was all over her, and she barley spent any time with me at school. I told her I was uncomfortable with this and she said that her and her friend wouldn't be separated by a boy or girl, and that if I wasn't comfortable then I should leave. I said that I will always love her but I couldn't be in a relationship where I was unhappy. So I broke up with her nicely and we left it at that. The next day we didn't speak to each other at all. I didn't want to abandon our friendship so I asked if she still wanted to be civil. She said Ahaha, no. We hadnt spoken in about two weeks after that. During this time there was a girl that I had also previously crushed on, and as it didn't seem like girlfriend 1 wanted anything to do with me, 2 days after I broke up I got together with girlfriend 2. Girlfriend 2 is kind and pretty and sweet, I can't find 1 flaw with her. But once with her I realised that I had moved relationships too quickly and I was still dwelling on girlfriend 1. But I thought that if I broke up with girlfriend 2 it would ruin a chance to date her when I was ready to move on. I still dwelled on Girlfriend 1 at times, telling my friends I hates her to suppress my feelings. And then I got more into the relationship with girlfriend 2 and we told each other we loved each other so much and stuff with love hearts and a billion kisses on texts, exetera. But deep down I'm not sure wether I love her like that, or she's just a distraction. Yes I know! I could be being a real bitch but I'm super confused and that's why I'm asking for advice to help me with decideding what to do with things. Anyway, so I'd have been dating girlfriend 2 for 2 weeks tomorrow, we've got each other gifts and stuff for our two week anniversary. But then tonight girlfriend 1 text me saying this exactly:
So
Um hi
This is just to say I'm really sorry for being such a bitch two weeks ago and I know I'm probably the last person you'll ever want to speak To again
But I'm willing to take up your offer on being civil if not friends again?
It's just that I do miss having you as a friend (let alone girlfriend) because you were an amazing person I appreciated having in my life even if I didn't show it much
So
Wanna be friends again?
Seeing this instantly made any progress I made go down the drain as old feelings were brought up again. Girlfriend 1 doesn't know I'm dating girlfriend 2. Old feelings were brought up and I agreed to try being friends again. I asked her about her sudden change in feelings after 2 weeks, she said that she missed having me in her life. I think she may want me back from his she's put things, I think she'd wait awhile before she asked anything though. But if she does want me back I feel like I'd want her back as well. But then there's girlfriend 2 and I think I may like girlfriend 2 as well, but who am I kidding? I think I still like girlfriend 1. Someone please tell me what I should do!!! I'm so confused and upset and I really need some help. Thanks :( (link)
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Well bottom line it sounds like your really confused here and you dont know what you want. the only way to really NOT hurt anyone right now would to either be not date either of them until you can figure yourself and your feelings out, or tell gf number 1 and hope she accepts it. Its not your fault she decided to snub you and then while it was happening you met someone else. thats her fault, she made the mistake of treating you like that and you shouldnt feel bad about it because you did nothing wrong here.
sometimes its important to let an untrained baby sit for a little bit in their own pee so that they can understand what it feels like to be clean and do what their supposed to do (go to the potty and pee like everyone else) get it??
if you want to be friends again thats fine but i would keep her at a distance for a while until she proves that she can act right again or is willing to acknowledge that she messed up.
secondly, dont take this out on gf number 2, if shes a good sweet person then why would you go back to the person that hurt you?? do you WANNA get hurt again?? probably not.
i say just stay with number 2 and if you ever brake up then youll have number 1 to go back to since youve stayed in contact but at a friendship ONLY level.
; ) good luck
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Rating: 5
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Thanks for answering! You're right, if gf 1 does ask me out I'll say no as I am dating gf 2, and we do have a good thing going. It'll be hard- but I don't want a repeat of before with gf 1. Thank you! :)
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