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I'm 15 (nearly 16) and I've recently broken up with my boyfriend, Ryan, of 3 months. I broke up with him face to face because I didn't want to do it over text and have him hating me, then when he got home we messaged and he asked why I'd left him and I told him it was because neither of us were happy anymore and he was getting very controlling and it was making me miserable so I told him that it would be better for both of us to call it a day. He said we could be friends again one day but it would take him a while to get over it, which is understandable. As me and Ryan are in a band with our mutual friend Jake we agreed to carry on with band practice etc. as usual.
2 days later at school I was in the practice rooms with Jake and I told him that as it wasn't an official practice day, Ryan would want me to leave when he got there so I said I'd find a different room. Except when Ryan turned up he didn't even come in the room, instead he sent his cousin in to pass on the message that I should "Piss off into another room and find my own friends" which upset and angered me because was going to leave when he got there anyway so he had some space, I don't see why he had to be so horrible about it?
At the end of that same day, some of my friends came up to me to warn me that Ryan was going round getting people to call me scampi (it's a horrible nickname he gave me) so I asked them if they knew why he was calling me that and they said they were talking to him at lunchtime and he said "Once, she gave me some gone-off scampi and lemon crisps and they tasted like when I licked her out"... I feel mortified...
I've never been able to get physically close to anyone because of bad childhood experiences but he made me feel safe. I was uncomfortable doing anything with him in the first place but he convinced me that I could trust him and that he'd treat me well. He was so nice at first and now I feel like a fool...
People at school keep coming up to me and calling me scampi and when I confronted Ryan about it he just said "Well I was angry" but that's no excuse for making my school life miserable. I just want to run far away and have a fresh start. He's telling me that he still cares about me and when I didn't turn up to school the day after I confronted him, he texted my mum telling me he wished me the best but it's all bullshit.. Surely if you love someone you wouldn't be able to do something like this, right?
I've already got a bad reputation at school from people telling lies about me but he's made it 100 times worse... And even when I found out what he'd been telling people about me, I didn't set out for revenge because I still love him, despite everything, and I know it's the wrong thing to do. I feel so helpless and alone, I even made myself ill so I didn't have to see him at school. I'm ashamed and embarrassed and I don't know what to do... Can anyone help me??? (link)
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You love what you thought he was.
He's angry and it's a good thing you broke up with him. It's a good thing you ended it now before you find this later on even worse. You would not want to date a guy who spreads rumors about his ex girlfriend. It's immature and disgusting.
If he continues this, try talking to a teacher, principal or counselor and let them know what's going on. They could even give you better advice on how to handle the situation.
This was wrong of him and don't feel stupid. You live and learn and just be glad you aren't with him anymore.
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