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adviceman49
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~A little Advice for the broken hearts~
You are afraid and hurt and you dont know what to do. You feel empty and alone, like the whole world has just ended. You have a hole in your heart one that feels like it can never be repaired, but just know that in time that hole will be gone. Getting your heart broken is like getting a deep cut. It hurts really bad, and no matter what you do you cant stop thinking about it because you know its there and its hurting, but with a few stitches and a little tlc (friends and family helping you through) and some antibiotic ointment (ice cream) soon that cut will only be a scar (a memory) it will always be there but it wont hurt anymore, you are strong and you can make it through this!!
advice
18/Female
I am from Puerto Rico. Currently in the process of getting an apartment and getting ready for college life. Except... I don't feel ready for it at all. I feel like I'm walking into a dark room with explosives planted all over and I'm bound to trip over one of them. Everyone I know seem so confident and are far much more ready than I am. This isn't my only problem. I'm scared. I'm scared of this new life that's coming ahead. I am going to an university that's about like two hours away from my home and that's without traffic. Sure, I'll be living with my best friend since seventh grade, but she has her whole future written out for her. She's already got an awesome summer job that is going to leave a lot of money for her and halfway through she's going to the US. She'll be much more busy and I feel that living together will somehow stretch us farther apart instead of closer because of how high up she is. She has had universities fight for her - I'm barely average intelligence.
I don't know if what I'm going for us what I truly want or if I'm cut out for it. I got in through Geology, meaning that I'm going for a Geology major but am planning to take a minor in Atmospheric Sciences so I can Master in this instead of Geology. However... my real passions lay within art. The last few months in high school left me yearning for things that aren't science. I was in charge of making scenography for a play to get funds for the graduation - it was a stress but I loved it! It felt so nice at the end... knowing that I had done that. I love theatre - singing, dancing, acting, especially dancing. I've always been camera shy so I never showed what I had, ever, and now I lament never doing so.
I don't know what to do. I feel lost here. Everybody is too busy to listen to me and what I'm feeling - my mom gets angry when I mutter so all she does is yell and that just makes me cry, which makes me feel worse. I see so many of my friends hanging out with boys and many of them in happy relationships while I'm just a loner who's too shy to approach guys and no guy has ever told me he likes me... I feel like I'm pretty much breaking. I've kept so many things inside that I don't think straight anymore, I lay around all day doing nothing while I know that I should get up and do stuff - anything! I just... I guess that basically what I'm saying is that I suffer from extreme low self esteem but always try to hide it, or at least most of it. I've already gotten advice but every advice I get seems so plain, empty and repetitive: "Everything will get better." "Smile." "Do what you want to do!" "Follow your heart." I'm not saying I don't appreciate it... but I want something else.
I just want somebody that will listen to me for real and understand me. Any advice to any of the stuff I just rambled?
It's perfectly normal to be afraid of life after High school. As a kid all you have to do is go to school, clean your room, and hang out with friends. Now its over and real life is about to begin far before you had ever expected. Ironic is'nt it, you wanted so badly to grow up and now the moment is here and all you want to do is cry for your mommy and after a cup of milk with cookies and a nap wake up and realize you are only 5 years old and all of this was just a dream and you can go back to the days where your biggest trouble was learning to color inside the lines. Trust me I get it. I had to grow up quick and before I was ready when I gave birth to my first child at only 17 years old. But the good thing is, this is just college, not a human being so you dont have to worry too much haha.
College can be scary I know when I first started I was terrified. Not because I was doing something I hated, in fact I loved it, I studied photography. The scary part was knowing that there was a possibility that I could fail and let my family down. But it all worked out well and I have yet to let anyone down. Or at least I dont think I did haha. Although there were a few times I came close to crying for my mommy, but I made it this far. But what kept me going was the fact that I knew I was doing something I loved. Other people tried to push me to become a nurse or something else because they said photography wouldnt make me much money. Which seems to be what you are going through. You shouldnt live your life trying to make other people happy and doing only things they want. You should live it for you. Otherwise you will never be happy with yourself. You will always be miserable and wonder "what if". And if the people around you truly love you they will come to love the choices you make. Only you know what is best for you and what will make you happy. Never give up on your dreams. You are terrified because you dont know what the future holds and you envy those who have it all together. But truth is, even your best friend doesnt have it all figured out, no one ever does. Life is full of surprises and if you are doing what you love then life will be full of happiness. I know that you are trying to do what everyone wants of you but I think you really need to think about it before you make any big choices like spending thousands of dollars on a carrer you dont even want. Try asking your mom or maybe another person you know and trust if you can stay with them a while longer before you start college so you can have a little bit to think about what you really want. Its ok to take a little time out before you go forward with big choices. If you ever need help or you want someone there to weigh the pros and cons with you let me know and I will be there to help. Life can be hard but definately easier if you have someone to walk through it with you. I hope that I can help you if I have not already. I am here to listen, no judgement, and answer the best I can. I hope all turns out great and I wish you the est of luck in your future :)
(Rating: 5) You are just simply AWESOME! Thank you for your incredible reply which helped me more than I can even tell you! Thank you! :)