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20/f last year I was raped by my ex boyfriend, long story short we drank (he led me to believe he was drinking but in actuality I was the drunk one,) when we went to bed I remember waking up to him doing the act. To this day I have not told anyone except a good friend, and my new current boyfriend (of almost 9 months) at the very beginning of our relationship, but I toned town the story a bit. Nobody actually knows everything that happened, and I can't seem to get over it. I have brought it up once to my boyfriend, and he consoled me (as well as wants to kill my ex) but I feel badly about the topic if it is to come up again, I don't want him to think I still think about my ex. Should I be over it by now? It makes me feel dirty and sick to think about it, I could cry.
Thank you
I'm so sorry this happened to you. Thinking about it has nothing to do with any sort of romantic feelings about your ex, and hopefully your current boyfriend will understand that. What happened to you was an extremely traumatic thing, and it's extremely common for rape/sexual assault survivors, as well as survivors of pretty much any traumatic event, to have memories of the event. Everyone has their own healing process, and if talking about it is what will help you get through it, then I can't imagine your boyfriend having a problem with it. I would like to recommend a site that helped me tremendously when I was going through a similar experience. It has various articles and resources, as well as a forum and chat room, both full of supportive people who have gone through similar experiences. http://www.pandys.org/
I'm not saying you have to visit the site, that's completely up to you, but if you ever need to just get things off your chest and talk to people who can relate, that's an amazing site to check out.
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(Rating: 5)
Thank you so much
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