Q: I am a female graduate student, in a program where the vast majority of students are female. Last year, I met one of my classmates, who I thought was a nice person, only to find out she is mentally unstable and a total nightmare. Long story short, she is manipulative, controlling, obsessive, paranoid, insanely perfectionistic, a pathological liar, and highly insecure. She comes across as very sweet, but what people don't see, is that she is the total opposite in reality. If you do one tiny, miniscule little thing to get on her bad side, she will literally give you hell.
I lived with her for several months, during which time, I inevitably got on her bad side. She did not talk to me, pretended to be nice (nauseatingly so) to me in front of other people, broke one of my things, hid her silverware and the kitchen trash can in her room, literally hoarded her groceries in her room, accused me of stealing her mail, lied to the landlord about me...Well, I finally left, and it's the best decision I made all year.
But, I can't stop thinking about her. I used to be friends with a couple of girls, who she got to side with her, so now, things are just not the same. Everyone adores her, but no body knows her, and it pains me to even think of it. She is literally mentally ill, but she is the total expert at hiding it, and makes everyone else look bad in the process. The thing that kills me, is that she has a throng of people who think she is such a little sweetheart, when in reality, she is a venomous snake, and they just can't see it. But I saw the red flags early on.
Anyway, I think about how much she has hurt and bothered me all the time. I can't stand seeing her in class, and it pains me to see my old friend (who is a nice person), so close to her, and so distant from me. This has negatively impacted my well-being, my studies...it's this constant gray cloud. Any thoughts and advice are greatly appreciated.
