Ok, I have this best friend, I'll call her Sierra. Now, Sierra is great and everything, but she's a little... well, to be honost, she's a complete poser. But instead of posing as a certain stereotype [skater, prep, emo, etc.] She copies me! She ALWAYS does what I do! Don't get me wrong, I am flattered, but it's annoying, especially when people actally believe her about things she says she does. Like art, for example. I've had a huge passion for drawing since Pre-K. My dad's side of the family were artists, so I kind of grew up around the environment. I have a sketchbook that I take to school, to doodle when I get bored in class. Ok, a few weeks ago, I had my sketchbook out in study hall and was doodling, when she comes up and asks me what i'm doing. I answered and then she goes off about how she "loves to draw too!" and "what a coincidance!". I have never, I mean NEVER, heard or saw any of this sudden artistic surge before, from her. She went on and on about how she was a "deep thinker artisticly inclined" [her exact words] person, and said she would bring her sketchbook so we could "study each other's artistic skills". Well, she goes out that night and buys her self one of those little kid's diaries, with lined, pink pages, and about the size of a regular chapter book. It was brand new, and I knew this for a fact, because it had a price tag on it.
That's just one example. Another;
My dad and I absolutely LOVE the Beatles. My dad has almost all of their cd's and some records and I've got most downloaded on my ipod. I've loved them for a while, and all my friends knew it, but until Sierra came along, no one really cared. She came along and decided she suddenly "loved the beatles" also. She only knows one song by them, but she acts like she knows all about them.
There are many other circumstances too. It has gotten to the point where she has even begun to dress like me! She wears the same shirt I do every day in gym. Don't get me wrong, it's flattering, but it's gotten to the point where it's a little infuriting. However, we happen to be best friends. I don't know how that worked out though, but we are best friends, since I DO like her as a person. It's just annoying as hell for someone to copy every move you make or thing you say. How do I let her know how much it annoys me, without actually saying it to her face? She's a tad Bipolar and gets set off very easily. I just don't want to ruin our friendship. Thanks.
I believe you still have to tell her up front whether you like it or not. I think notes/messages are sketchy and cliche. They allow you to think of what you want to say instead of downright saying it!
But yea, you prolly have to tell her upfront. Not saying you HAVE to, Im saying it will be the better option to take. By confronting her, your saying its not just something general, its important. So when you do talk to her about, keep it calm and settled so that nothing will get too out of hand. If you notice your voice is getting louder or speeding up, pause and tone it down. Remind her that everyone is an individual and that everyone like their individuality. Be patient with her, and let it take time to sink into understanding. Because if its all done right, everything will even out in the end.
I bet she has a good reason to try to like the things you like. But its a matter of communication that will let you and her know your boudaries of whats comfortable and not. And after you discuss the problem and feel like shes getting it, maybe every now and again warn her shes doing it, but dont pester her.
I wish you good luck b(^_o)
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Thanks!
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