Gender:
FemaleLocation:
USAOccupation:
College StudentAge:
20Member Since:
March 28, 2006Answers:
326Last Update:
July 29, 2006Visitors:
27520Favorite Columnists
karenR
Lalagurl
BlondBritBrit
xO_b_r_i_a_n_a_Ox
kristen22
TheTeenGirl
xoMarisox
EarthMother
loverly
Main Categories:
Love Life
Friendship
Colleges & Universities
View All
about
Hey everyone! My name is Kristen, I'm 20 and I'm a college junior studying pharmacy. I've been blessed with a really good life, and part of the reason for that is because I've learned to see GOOD in everything that happens to me. I love giving advice, and I've been told that I do a good job at it, but I'll let you decide! Feel free to ask me anything... don't be shy, that's why I'm here. I've been through a lot... moving from one country to another, leaving and finding new friends, break ups, boys, middle school, high school, college, self esteem issues... pretty much most things that people need help with.
I usually spend a good amount of time answering your questions, so I would really appreciate it if you leave me an honest rating along with some feedback (good or bad!) It really does help me improve my advice... and in the end, that's good for YOU! Talk to ya soon! :)
advice
Okay well as a young child i was raped multiple times by the same person. and out of the blue i get flashbacks and they keep on coming back to me. Like even when im watching TV lying down on my bed i picture him coming into my room and i freak out. Its been like a decade ago and it still scares me...if this is happening now, whats gonna happen when i want to do stuff with a guy? how do i get rid of it? i dont want to go to a therpist or anything cuz they just freak me out even more!
hey! wow im sorry that this happened to you... this guy should have been reported to the police, and if you still know his name or if he is around you should deffinitely file a report even if it has been a while. he needs to be punished for what he did, because it is absolutely unacceptable.
as far as how you should get rid of these thoughts you are having... well, honestly i don't know if you can ever get rid of them COMPLETELY, but you can deffinitely make sure they don't cross your mind every day and interfere with your life. from what you are saying, it seems like you never told anyone about this... you don't talk to anyone about what happened? you don't have to go to a therapist but you should deffinitely let someone close to you know what happened... someone that you trust. a really good friend, a school councelor or teacher, parents, other relatives... anyone. when you talk about your problem and share it with someone else, it will be out in the open and it won't be this deep dark secret that you have to keep to yourself and in your mind. it makes a huge difference, because it takes pressure off and lets you feel less alone. plenty of people love you and care for you and will be willing to help... even if it just means listening to your story.
as far as guys in the future... well once you let your problem out in the open, it will be easier to tackle this problem as well. you will want to take things VERY VERY slow with guys in the future as far as physical stuff goes. get to know them on a deeper level first, and once you feel comfortable with them let them know what happened. if they truly like you and care for you they will understand and will not pressure you to do anythin g that you aren't comfortable with. this will all be easier when you talk to people about what happened instead of keeping it bottled in, but just remember that most guys aren't like the jerk that did this to you. a guy that cares for you will never do such a thing! really it just takes time, but you will deffinitely be fine! just keep telling yourself that things will be ok, talk to people, and report this guy! i hope everything works out for you! :)
(Rating: 5) omg thank you so much. you rock, and have awesome answers i will come to you with more stuff! thank you again!