LiLReBeL6907's advice column

hey there's this guy that's new and he goes to my middle school now. he's really cute and nice and funny and talented, and i really like him. a lot of other people in my grade like him too, but i've never talked to him before because i have no classes with him, and during lunch he usually goes to a club. i want to get to know him more, and i want to be able to talk to him. my x wanted to know who i liked, and i told him, and he said he would hook me up with him for me, but i told him not to. the next day my x told me he asked the guy that i like if he likes me, and he said no. i was really sad about that. is there anything i can do so that he'll start to like me? and is there anything i can say to him if i ever have the chance to see him? im really shy, and i'm not so good at talking to people that i like and i've never even talked to before.
please help!!!!! i rate high for good answers!!

Alright, many people have this problem. It is hard to talk to someone you like when you haven't even said one thing to them in the first place. All I have to say is: How well do you know him? What do you like about him? You obviously think he is cute and only know general things about him, but you don't KNOW him. You have a crush on him, but you can't truly like him for who he is without getting to know him. And I don't want to sound rude but you made a HUGE mistake telling your ex about who you liked. One: It is none of his buisness who you like, and Two: He shouldn't have said anything to the guy you liked in the first place, since you told him not to. You should ALWAYS keep your crushes to yourself. Now the guy already knows you like him and he has already made his opinion about you without ever getting a chance to know you. So it is his loss, not yours. He says he doesn't like you so there is not much you can do, because you can't "make" someone like you. They either do or they don't. If you continue trying to get him to like you, you might come off as creepy or stalkerish, and that will only make things worse. I'll give you a real life example from my own experience. I was in 7th grade and I had a HUGE crush on this sort of popular guy. He was out of my league and I was not real shy, but I had trouble talking to guys I liked. So one day he got an assigned seat next to me in class. This was the only class I had with him, so I was excited. We gradually started talking, starting off with me asking for an eraser, and then a piece of paper... Well I could tell he kind of liked me but he never admitted it. When it was just him and me I KNEW he liked me. But when he was around his popular friends, I was invisible to him. I held on to him even though I knew he wasn't right for me because I liked him SO much and I wanted to make him like me. Well one day I told one of my guy friends who I liked and it got around. The next day EVERYONE knew. He said he didn't like me at all and then he started going out with this real popular girl. It hurt me really bad because I thought I didn't measure up to him and I wasn't good enough. People kept calling me his stalker and it really bothered me. Well a year passed and I got over him. I realized that I deserved better. I was not the one with the problem, I was not the one who didn't measure up... HE was. And ironically guess who started liking me in 8th grade and 9th grade? He did. And did I give him the light of day? Nope. Because he was immature and not worth it. So all I'm saying is don't take any bull shit from this guy. He said he doesn't like you. Whether it is the truth or not, it doesn't matter. It is time to move on. You can get way better and if he really got to know you I'm sure he would really like you. So try working on your social skills so you aren't so shy. The more you break out of your shell the more people will notice what an amazing person you are. If you see someone you haven't talked to before and they look friendly, strike up a conversation. Make yourself known. People will realize that your not the "shy girl" anymore. Wear clothes that make you feel confident. Style your hair a new way that will get you noticed. Make a dramtic change to how you do your make up. These outside changes will make people look at you. The next step from there is to become more outgoing. If you look friendly and outgoing people will WANT to talk to you. So just focus on becoming less shy, and forget about this guy for right now. If it is meant to be it will happen. I hope my advice helped and if you ever need anything note my inbox. Good Luck! ~Sherah

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(Rating: 5) hey u give such good advice! how do u think of all this stuf?! lol

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