askMiss_Lily
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Q: My best friend and I are both girls and I'm 14 and she's 13. We have experimented 3 times and we've liked it each time(nothing below the belt). On one day she says she wants a boyfriend really bad,then other days she says that she wishes she could be with me and life would be so much easier and i'm the only one who listens to her seriously and cares and truly understands.I feels she very insecure about her liking for me because she feels God won't love us becuase she's sinning and that her parents will not except her anymore. Her parents barely except her now and they really don't take her seriously and they really don't trust her with the simpliest things. I wonder if she really wants to be with me because she would believe that our love for each other can't stop God from loving us and our love can conquer over her parents. Also on some days she made a strong statement that she wants to find her partner in life thats a man. She would only go for woman if they were the last human species on earth. I thought that was harsh and cold blooded because every time we experimented we never thought about any males while we were being affectionate to each other. I know for sure i'm bisexual and i'm comfortable with that, but the way my best friend talks it seems like she's confused big time about herself. I'm wondering if i should talk to her about it or she just needs to figure it out on her own. I'm ready to talk to her about it, but i want a second option on what I should do.
It is always good to talk about it. In this situation, I think it would be easier just to talk to her about her feelings. Ask her how she feels about you and a potential relationship with you. Let her know that you aren't trying to pressure her into anything, but that you are tired of wondering and would just rather know for sure. Let her know that whatever she decides to do regarding you all, you will accept and remain her friend no matter what. It already sounds as if she has a lot of pressure from her parents and then the added pressure of her religion, she doesn't need anymore. You need to be her comfort zone. Listen to the way she talks. If she says more positive things about wanting to be with you, then you can express your feelings for her. But if she is more confused, then you should back down and let her think it through. It seems like your friend is very confused about her sexuality, and that there is too much conflict going on in her head. Just remember not to pressure her and be her open ear.

thank you so much!!

bio
Miss_Lily

I am a 22 year old mother of two that has had to grow up a lot faster then her years. I have been married for four years, but now am seperated from my significant other due to lack of his being able to handle a mature relationship. I can relate to almost anyone, and have been sought out, both online and off, for my advice. I answer all questions truthfully and honestly. If I don't know an answer to a question or I think other resources would be helpful, then I go into researh mode until I find an answer or the proper resource. I aspire to be a life coach in the future, because I like helping people make decisions to make their life better for their future. I am here not only to answer advice questions on this site, but to also chat with you if you feel like you need a more indepth one-on-one help.



Here are some of the guidelines I go by when answering advice questions:

  • I am always truthful in any advice I give.
  • I would never give anyone any advice that I would not follow myself.
  • I take into consideration your feelings when answering questions, but I will not sugar coat anything. If you are wrong, then you are wrong and I will tell you so.
  • If I cannot answer a question to the best of my ability, then I will point you to someone who can, or I will research my butt off until I find a helpful solution for you.



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Gender:
Female

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Sweet Home Alabama

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Phone Operator/Stay-at-home mom

Age:
22

Member Since:
March 25, 2005

Answers:
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Last Update:
May 7, 2005

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