EnchantedSage's advice column

my parents don't like my boyfriend..because i went out with him before and he treated me pretty bad..but i really think he has changed but i don't know if my parents think that or not! what can i do to make them gain trust back in him? because if they don't trust him that means i don't get to see him as often?
i rate super high!

Unfortunately, there is nothing that YOU can do for him to regain your parents' trust. Only your boyfriend can do that.

I don't know your parents, so I can't tell you specifically what it would take for them to cut him some slack, but if he treated you badly in the past then, as your parents, they are right to mistrust him a little and to be leary of your continued relationship.

However, that doesn't mean that he isn't a good guy, who made some bad judgments in the past and has learned from his mistakes and wants to do right by you now. If this is the case (which I sincerely hope it is), then over time as he treats you with the kindness and respect that you deserve and shows respect to your parents as well, they will most likely see the positive changes in him and start to believe in his "new leaf".

Your parents want what is best for you and if it turns out that your boyfriend hasn't changed and he starts to mistreat you again, they are going to feel guilty and probably a little responsible for allowing you to see him at all. So, ultimately, they are trying to do what they think is right for you because they care.

Your parents' lack of trust is a direct consequence of his past mistreatment of you. Both you and your boyfriend need to understand that it will take time and patience from everyone in this situation to get back to where you were before. The bottom line: if he is the good guy that you believe him to be, in time, your parents will recognize that. Best of luck to you.

Kind wishes,

[view]

(Rating: 5) thanks a million hun!

<<< Previous Advice Column

Next Advice Column >>>