Ask solightninglove!

Advice Column | Ask a Question | View Feedback |

About solightninglove



sara. 19. oh. i'm disappointing. most mornings i don't want to wake up, but it happens eventually. i love to sleep. i usually never remember my dreams, although i try to. hopeless romantic and i hate it. i never know what i want. i'm not satisfied. i'm a bitch to my parents. i say that i hate them often. i don't. i'm a brat. my family is the best there is. i regret, often. i love music. who doesnt though? i appreciate it. i never want to grow up. the fact that i can't help this scares the fuck out of me. i believe in god. i'm not christian even though you will see me fondly wearing a cross. i don't do drugs. i don't drink. although i probably will as soon as i hit 21. i play the guitar. i wish i could play the drums and the keyboard. designing things is fun. i try and give good advice. ask me anything. i will try and help. i like helping people. i love you all. xxx

Ask Me For Advice
View Feedback
Make Favorite Columnist

Gender: Female
Age: 19
AIM: solightninglove
Member Since: April 13, 2007
Answers: 147
Last Update: January 7, 2009
Visitors: 6986



Advicenators.com



is their any job hiring in chicago for 15 year olds without a work permit?

you can make a profile on snagajob.com to look for part time jobs, :)

[view]


I don't have very big boobs- I wear a 34B, but the cups are almost too small. Plus, my left boob is definitely a C cup, but my right fits a B perfectly. I'm not really worried about that, as I’ve heard they'll even out eventually (I’m only 17).

Anyway, I just want my boobs to look smaller. I envy my girlfriends that have small boobs- they look cuter in tank tops and halters, whereas mine look semi-slutty in certain tops. I'd love to wear a simple, spaghetti strap shirt with a triangle chest area without having to wear a tank under it to hide cleavage.

Is there anything I can do to make them look smaller? Any type of bras, workouts, or anything? Any help is appreciated.

if you go to department stores or victorias secret they should have minimizing bras that make your boobs look smaller. :)

[view]


Hey, thanks in advance -

I'm 14/f. My boyfriend of 2-ish months just turned 16.
He's a really cool guy, and he's totally chill about our relationship, as am I. But, the thing is, for the past week/a little longer, after school he usually tries to give me a goodbye kiss. He usually says something like, "alright, well I gotta get going...I have to go see 'so-and-so teacher'," or something. then he gives me a nice hug, which i like :) But then, he's tried to lean in and give me a quick kiss, which I know most people would be completely normal with...but I just tend to be really personal about those things, I guess. So, there always happen to be lots of people in the hall right there, and I'm really not a fan of PDA...I guess I just don't feel comfortable with that at this point. Kissing in front of others, I mean. I like hugging. I'm all for that =P.

Anyway...I feel like such an awful person, because I have been soo nervous when he's tried, as in...I just don't know how to tell him I'm not into that, without sounding mean or anything.
So, instead...Ive kind of just been turning my head..kind of just turning around, looking around or something...I really feel terrible about this.

I just don't know how to bring it up, and I'm sure he'd be totally understanding and cool about it. But I know he PDA'd quite a bit with his last girlfriend ( of like, 2 years...the only other girlfriend he's had). So, I think he's just used to it. See, I'm not...I'm all for it in private.

Let's just say I'm more into pDA with a lowercase "p"...if you know what i mean =p

Thanks so much - i have to bring it up to him, but i'm afraid he'll try to do it again before i get a chance to talk to him alone. and I definitely don't want him to think that i don't like him anymore!!! which is what i'm afraid will happen, since i keep kind of avoiding the kiss...


how do i bring it up? what do i say/do?

thank you sooo much!!!
:) :) :)

awkwardd.
anyway. maybe you could write him a note that says exactly what you want to say to him. My boyfriend is not a big fan of the PDA but i am. I'm just a very affectionate person my nature, so i get a little confused when he turns away sometimes. but i know now that he just doesn't like to kiss in public or when people are looking and im totally cool with that. just tell him your not into PDAs and im sure itll be fine. do you kiss him in private? hope this helped yo. :)

[view]


i dont know what topic this is so anyway....im a light sleeper....when there is a bad thunderstorm..i get really scared..so i go into my moms room and sleep on the floor..i feel pathetic because im 13!!!I always think of thunderstorms as a horror movie......which i cant stand horror movies...mom thinks its because when i was very young i saw my dad punch my mom and her face was bloody...i screamed and cried..my mom and dad are divorce.....i dont think my friends respect that i get easily scared and cant watch movies or i get nightmares because they bring them to sleepovers to watch so im in another room watching tv feel so stupid...when we play hide and go seek in the dark i get scared because im still afraid of the dark that i need my tv on....

about the thunderstorms...i have lived in a small-medium town my whole life...and soon ill be moving into the country....country also reminds me of horror films for some reason...how can i deal with these kinds of things!!!!????



im SORRY if this is confusing im just tired of feeling pathetic...worrying how ill be in ten years when im alone and mom wont live with me anymore....i really need help!!

so the questions again are:

What should I do when they bring horror movies or suggest to watch a horror movie at theaters?

How can i not be afraid of thunderstorms espically in country?

first of all you shouldn't feel stupid because everyone is afraid of something. i get scared when i think about scary movies at night plus i have a really creepy basement so that doesnt help. and im 18yo yeah. i used to sleep in my parents room too. but i got over it mostly because i had to. i just did it. im not really sure how. but maybe if you face your fears. like watching scary movies. if its too scary though then your friends should respect that. I refuse to go see scary movies in the theatre, because its like your out in the open and nothing is behind you which makes it scarier but i can watch them at peoples houses. i probably am not helping very much lol. but anyway i always find if you eat popcorn while watching movies that helps because you have something to hide behind, it makes it seem more like just a movie, and it makes you focus on more than one thing. anyway sorry for rambling on and on like this.

[view]


ok Well I'm 157cm tall but noone uses that anymore they say like 5 ft 2.

How tall in inches and feet would I be?

your almost five two your like five one point eight lol

[view]





hey, i have an iBook G4 (it's an apple // mac, not windows)


&& i was trying to find out how to clear the google history, you know, when you type in one letter and the drop-down list comes saying what you've googled in the past that starts with that letter? is there a way to clear that?

i've already tried to just delete my history on my computer, and that doesn't work. any ideass?

thanksss (=

or you could go to tools: clear private data: and delete your browsing history. :)

[view]


ok my boyfriend who ive been dating for a while just told me that he has felt up and has watched a girl change...i asked him before if he had ever gone farther then making out and he said no.. hes 15 and im 14 by the way anyways my questions is do i have a good reason to be mad at him??

if he lied. then yes

[view]


this is a story of a girl who cried a river and drowned the whole world and while she looks so sad in photographs i absolutely love it when she snmiles

whats the name??

i absolutely love that song. its called absolutely (story of a girl) haha and its by nine days

[view]


14/f

i have done everything sexually except for intercourse and well anal but thats just gross.
Now i dont wanna hear all the stuff about oh your too young. because what you say will not effect me.
i have had the same boyfriend for a good amount of time. i havent done anything sexual with anyone but him. now i would like to know if a doctor can tell that ive gotten oral, fingered, givin head, and all that stuff? because if they can im screwed. lol
answers please

im pretty sure they can tell, but only when theyre looking for it. i'm not really sure. there is a slim chance you could get pregnant if a your bf masturbates and then fingers you. just to let you know. anyways good luck, and be careful.

[view]


The only lyrics are "Have a little faith in me" And its on the commercial for Lucky You or some new movie coming out with Drew Barrymore.

the song is have a little faith in me HAHA, but its done by a number of artists including: John Hiatt, Jewel, Mandy Moore, and Joe Cocker.
hope that helps
-sara

[view]


ok i have two questions.. at what age do most girl lose their virginity and how far have most girls gone by age 14 or 15

i would love as many answers as possible thanks in advance!

Most girls lose their virginity by the age of 18. i'd say at 14 or 15 second base? i'm not sure. but if your thinking of having sex. remember you should only start having sex when YOU are ready. Having sex for the first can make you feel a lot of different emotions.You should Never feel pressured into having sex. You'll never forget the first time. and keep in mind a girl can get pregnant the first time even if she's on her period. so use protection.
hope this helped
xx
-sara

[view]


Okey i have only had one boy-friend! & we went out for like almost a month.. -- we broke up with eacthother because we wanted to get to know eacthother! anyways


like its has been a year or something & i havent had a boyfriend since... im fourteen am i ugly?

awh dear your not ugly, your really pretty. dont even think that.. i didnt have a boyfriend until a few weeks ago... and im 17 yeah.. sometimes it just doesnt happen.. boys are kindof stupid anyway... heres a really fun quiz: 'why dont you have a bf'::: http://ynr.blogthings.com/whydontyouhaveaboyfriendquiz/
hope i helped xxx
-sara

[view]


I was wondering how you can only have so much in your aim profile but when you copy someone elses it doesnt fit? How does it fit in there profile i cant fit anything in my aim profile but other people can fit as much as they want i thought maybe there was a code or something.


thanks

you can also use http://buddyprofile.com/ to add several pages of aim profile you just copy and paste the code they give you after you make your prof. and i believe you can have all sorts of colors
hope that helps -sara

[view]


Can someone come up with some good techno songs i want more of them

thanks :] i do rate

check out fischerspooner. theyre like electronic or something. i heart them.

[view]


Is a 27 inch waist small, average, or large for a 15 year old girl? 5"4

i would say average to smallish, i'm 5"4 also and my waist is about 30inches. people often say i am very small, but i dont think i am. so we're pretty skinny yo lol. w00t

[view]


how can you tell the difference in falling out of love w/ someone and just "getting used to them" or whatever.

im 16/f and hes 17/m.. this is my first "real relationship" so its not like ive experienced this before. weve been together 9-10 months.

its like sometimes i love him sooooooo much and i dont kno what id do without him.. other times its just like whatever i dont care and i could go for days without talking to him [we talk every single day [[diff. schools btw]] and its starting to get irritating].

i cant picture myself without him and i dont want someone else to have him and i dont want any one else but sometimes its just UGH ya kno?

what can i do? .. btw "taking a break" is not an option, if were over, were over, but i dont think thats what i want.

omg, this sounds like me and my bf weird. anyway i agree with the other person who answered this question. you just feel like your sufficating and you need some air. its like okay i love you and all but do we need to be talking EVERY SECOND. my bf calls me every single day too. sometimes its a little frustrating, sometimes i just dont answer the fone, which isn't really a good solution :/ but do tell him you need time to yourself to think, hell to breath. thats what im GOING to do.

[view]


what is dry sex?

its kind of like having sex when you still have some clothes on

this is the definition from urbandictionary.com::
at least some bottom articles of clothing remain on one or both sexual participants while they engage in the "motions" of sex (thrusting, etc) without actual penetration

hope that helped
-sara

[view]


what does xx mean?

cuz when i was chatting some1 wrote that 2 me...??? i didn't wanna ask cuz i don't wanna seem stupid lool

actually i think x's are hugs and o's are kisses
lol thats how i sign mine too
xxx -sara

[view]


Okay im a 13/f and i got out of a relasion ship about 2 or three weeks ago. Then My ex's best friend asked me out and i said no cuz i have a friend who likes him so i thought i was doing the wright thing so i let him go. then this guy grey asks me out and i have known him since i was like mabey 3 or 4 and he is really nice and he gives me a hole lot of attention and i like it alot. But i think mabey if i say yes to grey that it might ruen our friend ship. So can you help me i need it despretly.
Luv,
Cant diside

if you like him talk to him about it. ask him if it doesnt work out will you stay friends? if you can, go out with him. but thats just my opinion.

[view]


im so effin pissed at my parents. like really really really pissed. i even feel myself getting mad.. and i just came from crying my eyes out in my room. anyway, my parents for some retarded reason will not let me go to any of my friend's sleepovers. i've only slept over at my cousins' houses but my parents were there too.. so it wasnt really like you know.. "girls night with friends". and in 4th grade my friend had a sleepover.. and i couldnt go because my parents didnt like the idea. that sucked because i rarely get to see her in the year and she was one of my besties. and now im 13 in 7th grade and its the SAME THING!! my friends 13th bday party is a sleepover, and well i guess i could also go home and NOT sleep over there, but its also the date of some meeting my family goes too. its optional for me and my siblings though, so i dont wanna do go i can go to my friend's party. BUT NOOOO my parents wont let me. she lives like less than 10 mins away from me, near my middle school so it wont be that hard to find either. and i dont understand why they cant drop me there before and then like pick me up when they get back from their meeting, or have my friend's mom drive me home, since my other aunt stays home at my house too. BUT NOOO we cant have that either, parents. i even asked them.. i ask them occasioanlly and they just say their own STUPID reason which is "we dont believe in sleepovers". how GAY is that???? im sorry that im overreacting here but i just feel like cursing really badly and screaming. it makes no sense!!! whos parents "dont belive in sleepovers?" NOBODIES! except MINE! im african, like my parents directly came from cameroon, so i guess they werent used to doing stuff like that at their house. but like they even got to have pets.. a cat and dog, and here we arent even allowed to have a hamster because they dont think we can care for a little thing! (and i dont like fish). anyway, what could be the reason why my parents dont like sleepovers? is it the same with you? do you know anyone who has the same situation? can you think of a way how i can still go, because i told her that i could because i assumed my parents would just let me go this time because ive been acting pretty good this week and even tidied my room without them yelling at me and etc. i even thought that it was cause they didnt trust people who werent like their race.. like white people which my friend is.. but i havent even had sleepovers with my other african friends, so its nor that. or they think that the parents will rape us. oh my freakin god. there are several other girls at the party.. im sure someone will notice if somethings up. and i dont think every flippin person in this world is a sex offender.. and even if some are.. like why cant i just go to the party??? my mom said it wasnt because of that either.. and i asked her WHAT HER REASON WAS! i asked my dad too and he AGREES! WHAT IS WRONG WITH MY FAMILY??? WHY CANT THEY JUST LET ME GO TO THE EFFIN PARTY FOR ONCE!! I CANT LIVE MY LIFE NOT GOING TO ANY SLEEPOVER TILL IM LIKE OUT OF COLLEGE?? WTF I'LL BE IN WORK BY THEN!!!!!! THATS NOT THE SAME AS A "GIRLS NIGHT OUT" AND IM FED UP WITH MISSING FRIENDS SLEEPOVERS ALL THE TIME BECAUSE OF MY PARENTS NOT LETTING ME GO FOR NO EFFIN REASON!!!!

awh, you poor thing.. did you try explaining to them that this was NORMAL here. everyone has sleepovers. not fair. maybe try to explain why you want to go so badly? i'm not sure why they wouldnt want you to go, maybe they just dont want you to grow up and have your own life.. maybe ask them something outragous like can i go out on a date with this guy? or can i get a tattoo? haha and then ask well can i at least go to my friends sleepoverrrrr PLEASEE? i dunno. good luck xxxx -sara

[view]




<<< Previous Advice Column
Next Advice Column >>>

eXTReMe Tracker