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Okay, (rather long, brace yourself)
so my boyfriend and i have been going out for almost eight months.
And he does things that really piss me off to no end, he does really immature things, and he goes out of his way to make me feel bad about myself.
Ill give some examples.
Immaturity
When im telling him an important story, and say things like "He came really fast"
He'll laugh at the sexual content.
the other day a basket ball hit me in the face.
and i call him im like
"Jake, i was playing basketball with alyssa and the ball hit me in the face, it really hurts"
He'll laugh at the balls part.
Like, its funny the first few times, but then it just gets annoying, and it makes me feel like he doesnt care about me.
Or he'll (please dont get offended) say the N word to me and he gets mad when i dont laugh.
Im like, "Thats not funny, its mean"
and just other things, and they may seem funny, but he brings them up at the worst times.
Making me Feel Bad
We were video-chatting the other day, and my web cam is attatched to my lap top, so, when i move around it moves with me.
And i guess my boobs zoomed in on the screen,
and he'll start laughing and be like "Your tits were on the screen"
Or ill dive in his pool.
and i KNOW my bathing suit top didnt fall down, and he'll make something up to say he saw my boobs. And i'll automatically be embarrassed.
When i know that didnt happen.
Or if i point something out about him that annoys me or bothers me.
He'll turn it around and blame it on me, or make it look like its my fault
For instance, I was watching gossip girl one night, and he knows that i cant talk on the phone and watch t.v at the same time.
So, i was like "We can talk on AIM"
And he was like "nono its fine go watch tv, ill do hw or something"
I take funny pictures of myself and send it to him cuz i think theyre funny, and when i dont do something he wants, he threatens to put them on facebook.
Or he shows people, when i strictly told him not to,and one time he set one as his backround
I just dont trust his witht hem anymore
and he makes me feel really bad.
On purpose.
Showing off in front of his friends
He is a totally different person in front of his friends. He'll show me off in front of them about how we make out and stuff, and act like he doesnt care about my opinion, and says really hurtful things even though he's 'just kidding.'
Too close for comfort
he shares things with me that really gross me out, and he relies on the fact that we love eachother so much that i wont break up with him. He's got that wrong, becuase i can totally still dump his ass. We made a promise to eachother that we'd stay together long as possible, and he gets too comfortable with that, and thinks he can do anything, and i wont break up with him for it. Like saying mean things about my friends, and all of the above.
Now, my sisters wedding is coming up in about 2 weeks, and i invited him to it.
Im the maid of honor and i wanted him to be my date.
I cant break up with him now.
and i know if i do, despite all these things, i'll still be upset.
Why is that i can come up with a billion things i hate about him, but i still love him, and would be really upset if we broke up?
That makes no sense.
Also, what should i do about these problems?
Sorry for writing so much.
I really hope you can help (link)
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To be honest, I just think he's just being a guy. I mean, we all know that guys mature slower than girls, so this is expected.
I do, however, think he is very immature, and I understand how you feel from the embarrassment he causes.
Unfortunately for you, I don't think he's the right one. If he liked you that much, he would never make you feel bad about yourself or embarrassed, and if he did, it would be as a joke and it wouldn't happen repetitively on purpose.
I don't believe you can stand to be with him any longer, and I know that may upset you, but he upsets you anyway. So either way you look at it, you (could) end up being sad, however, if you broke up with him, you'd find so much relief after a few days have passed because you'll realize that you're better off without him.
And even know you said you invited him to your sisters wedding in 2 weeks, you can break up with him. You will probably have a better time without him anyway.
I think you can find someone out there who deserves you and doesn't embarrass you. Someone who is nice and fun and doesn't say rude things to you. Because no one deserves that.
Hope this helped!!
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my best friend and i just had a really big fight. and the fight was about how i frustrate her because i have low self esteem. ='[
i don't know what to do. i've been crying for an hour now and i feel so helpless and lost. most of my friends get annoyed with me i think. because i'm stupid and dumb.
see? low self esteem. i can't help it. it's not a problem that i can just make up my mind to fix. it doesn't work like that. i don't know what to do and i feel sick and lost. the person i'd call to talk to about this would be her, but she's the one that hurt me. she's basically all i have left. the other two people i want to talk to just to talk to someone won't answer their phones and i'm just so sick right now.
i don't know how to fix this. i just don't know. i feel lost. =[
~15/f (link)
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Well I think you can easily fix your low self esteem issue. Whatever the cause is, and for you i'd think it was a confidence issue, I think you should talk to your parents or an older sibling you can trust about this, especially if you feel like you have no one else to talk to.
I think you should take some deep breaths and relax a little bit. I also think you should write a list of all the good traits about yourself and read it everyday until you feel good about yourself and think your self esteem has increased greatly.
You can work on your self esteem by you and others trying to raise it. And if you don't have anyone else but your best friend and 2 others to talk to, I think you should try and make even more friends so they, too, can help you in times of need.
And if your friend isn't willing to help you bring up your self esteem, then she's really no friend to you at all, because friends help other friends no matter what. And even if she may be frustrated that she sees good in you and you don't, she should still help you through this.
If all you see is negative about yourself, then there's never going to be a light at the end of the tunnel and there will never be a "bright side". Be positive about yourself and things will pick up and life will be much better.
Don't feel lost or sick, these are just some things teenagers go through and it will get better, but you have to try and make things better because YOU are the main factor in YOUR life getting brighter, no one else.
I hope this helped! Feel better, and take my advice!
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16/f
Okay, well i like this guy a lot and he is a year older than me. We are "talking." Well, the thing is, is that i have never kissed a guy before and my friend told him that. That is really embarrising on my part. He dosen't like shy girls and won't go for someone like that. Now, if he calls me tonight, i will be really embarresed to talk to him! He also said that if we go out then he won't know when to kiss me because i haven't done that before.
What do i do!! I finally find a guy i like and she goes off and tells him this. Every time i find a guy i like, my friends tell them that and then they don't go out with me and i don;t get a boyfriend! What do i do? (link)
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First things first, I know the feeling of embarrassment, because I, too, was there until recently. However, I was waiting for the right person, and you may be also, so if he asks why you haven't kissed anyone before, just tell him that you were waiting for the perfect person (after all, to me, the first kiss was important, it can't be with just anyone). So don't be embarrassed !
Now, you said that he wouldn't know how to kiss you. Well, then you can kiss him. I know you may not know when to kiss him, but the perfect moment will come, and when it does, both of you will go in for it.
Hope this helped! If you need more help or advice, feel free to message me ;]
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okay so i've never kissed a guy. i've been waiting for the right person. except, i think i found him and i don't know how i would kiss/makeout with him. i'm totally lost. any tips? (link)
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I totally know how you feel. The right time will come naturally, so don't feel forced to kiss him! It really does come completely naturally but if you really want to kiss him, try when you guys are separating or leaving each other and then give him a gentle kiss which leaves the both of you comfortable and leaves him ultimately flattered :]
Hope this helped!
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so this boy and i have been "talking and having a thing for each other for like over a year" but ive had other hook ups and crushes during that but recently in the last 4/5 months we have got so much closer and no guy matters, like hes all i want. he took me on a date in july, it was amazing. and we just went to homecoming together, and it was even more amazing. plus we just hooked up for the first time at homecoming (making out) so we are taking it extremely slow, but when he took me out he paid for everything and was such a gentleman. i loved it. plus he knows i like him and i know he likes me. im not sure if its time for an offical realionship, because we bascially are dating..but my question is: what are some cute things that i can do for him to show him that i reallly like him and to pay him back for doing all those things for me when he took me out?
please & thank youuuu! (link)
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Give your time to him, guys like that. Invite him to your house and do fun things. Play a boardgame (Life, Clue..) and have some pizza or/and watch tv and wait for him to make a move (i.e. put his arm around you, or go in for a gentle kiss). Or you can just take him out to a movie, which is relatively easy on the wallet and it's really cute !
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well i have a boyfrind and we have kissed but it only lasts for like one second becase he like pulls away. i really want to make out with him and i think he really wants to make out with me but we just dont...what do i do?? (link)
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Well, depending on where you are (location-wise), maybe he feels uncomfortable.
I made my boyfriend wait about 5 weeks before I actually felt comfortable making out with him.
You don't have to do anything, just wait patiently and your time will come. It just comes naturally and he made the first move, not the other way around ;]
Hope this helped !
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hey im kind of a shy person and i want to be loud and outgoing.
i really want a bf and i dont have many guy friends in or out of school.
(only one close guy friend who is like one of my best friends, i like him but hes 3 years younger then me so thats out of the question.)
i dont know how to become close to guys in school and find guy friends out of school.
also im not very good a flirting and being myself around guys what can i do to fix that?
thanx in advance (link)
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Don't become "loud" because that may come off as being obnoxious (and guys find that annoying), but I understand what you mean by that.
If you want a boyfriend (and believe me, there's no rush), just act normal! Seriously, guys like girls who are themselves and who are relaxed.
And flirting (without being too over-the-top) can be just smiling.
Be confident, you can do it :] !
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How do I say hi to a guy and start a conversation?
How do I get a guy to like me even though nobody ever did? How do I say hi to him without him thinking I'm weird???
btw, I'm 13. (link)
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If I want to start a conversation, I just say, "hi, how are you?" and people tend to like that.
If you want someone to like you, just be yourself and free-spirited. Looks aren't everything, but look nice and cute. Don't wear too much make-up or try too hard.
Hope this helps!
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