Age: 18
Member Since: March 26, 2008
Answers: 27
Last Update: March 6, 2013
Visitors: 2936
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So the other night I got home from a concert and my boyfriend said he "knows for a fact" that I am cheating on him. I work late hours (til between 12am and 3:30am) and go out with friends maybe once a week, and sometimes grab a beer if I get off work early. I have no desire to cheat on him...but no matter what I say he does not believe me, I told him I love him and have no interest, check my timecard for work, etc. Still he thinks I am lying. I really just like to go out and have a good time with friends once in a while. Its gotten to the point where he makes sure I wear plain cotton underwear to work. How can I convince him to allow me to keep hanging out with my friends at night and that i am not cheating? he doesnt drink or like going out so I cannot invite him with, plus he works during the day so when i go out he is just sleeping anyway. I feel like I have said everything to him I possibly could. (link)
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You shouldn't have to prove anything to your boyfriend. If he doesn't trust your word than tell him he must not respect you.
I mean if he has absolutely NO proof that you're cheating on him then he has no reason to keep making false accusations, when you're doing exactly what you say you're doing.
You shouldn't be forced to wear certain underwear just because hes afraid you'll go off with another guy... and you shouldn't have to get his permission to hang out. Tell him just that... I mean if you can't get it through his head than maybe he's not even ready for a relationship. His insecurities have the best of him.
I mean it's one thing if you say "I'm not cheating on you" and he believes you but he's still afraid you will, I mean because thats a fear a lot of people in relationships have. But it's another thing if he tells you he's POSITIVE you are, because that's just extremely harsh on you, seeing how you're not doing anything...
I mean I don't know you so obviously I don't know if you have a reputation for cheating or lying or anything like that (I'm not saying you do), but maybe that's where he's getting the idea from... or if he's had a girlfriend in the past whose cheated on him.
But I think you should definitely sit down with him one night instead of going out with your friends... and basically tell him along the lines - "look, I stayed home just to talk to you about what's been on your mind. I wanna be with you tonight, because I care about you and I want to sort this situation out... what makes you think I'm cheating on you? When did you start feeling this way?"
I mean maybe he just feels left out so he's actually looking for you to start inviting him places... but make it clear to him you're not gonna be in a relationship with someone who doesn't respect you back. Talk with him in person and get to the bottom of it... if the situation is avoided it will only get worse.
good luck.
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f/15
does it really hurt for a girl for the first time cause if it hurt so bad then why do people do it again>>> (link)
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Well the thing is when a girl has sex for the first time her vagina is still tight which is why it hurts so badly. Usually after the hymen is ripped or the girl has had sex more than a few times it doesn't hurt as much.
It's one of those feelings that eventually a girl will get used to the more she has sex. It won't hurt every time, it just depends on how used to it your body is.
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Well, the other day I was talking to my boyfriend and he asked me "how far I wanted to go". To be honost, I really don't know. I had planned to stay abstinent until marriage, but I know that as I get older, I might lose my current, or future, boyfriend if I don't want to do very much sexually. I mean, I don't know. I'm only 14 so I think i'm to young to be "sexually active", but it seems as if everyone's doing something like that.... I just don't know what to do...are guys going to pressure me to do this stuff when I get into highschool? I guess i'm just afraid of being the last person considered "prude". Thanks, any advice welcome. (link)
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Well why would you want to be with someone who would leave you if you didn't want to do anything sexual?
I mean you're only 14 and you have so many other opportunities to find someone you love and then if you decide, to lose your virginity to.
But don't make such serious decisions about this kinda of thing just because everybody else is doing it... I mean I know you're curious and it's exciting to think about and everything but it's WAY more special if you wait... trust me. When I was 14 my boyfriend at the time kept begging me to have sex... I felt weird and uncomfortable, which is how I knew I wasn't ready... plus the fact that he was pressuring me showed me that he didn't respect the fact that I didn't want to do it.
but now that I'm 18, I look back on it... and I'm so glad I waited for the right person. Plus boys at that age are immature so you have to be careful. A lot of times when they get what they want they end up becoming really bored and they move on.
Being "prude" to others is better than regretting this situation 5 or 10 years down the road ya know? I mean no one's gonna care... the older you get the more people mature and learn to think for themselves.
I hope you do the same and make the decision you feel is best for you.
good luck.
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i got my curse this week (my period) and I have REALLY bad cramps. I don't know what to do to make them better!
help please
15/f (link)
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motrin :)
I always have major cramps and stomach aches around that time, but it usually works for me.
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Well me and my boyfriend have been going out for a year & a month . But i just like dont trust him , well i mean i trust him i just dont like him around girls ''/ idk why , he has never done anything to make me not trust him. He trusts me , and doesnt care if i go anywhere with my girls and there's guys around but i dnt like him going anywhere where girls are . I want us to have a great relationship but i just cant help it . I just always think about girls trying to flirt with him or this and that . He's told me before that im the Only one for him , he's in love with me and he doesnt want anyone else but i just dont know whats wrong with me . I have came a very long way with jelousy from the start. But like when his friends want to do stuff they usually have girls with them & sometimes i cant go so i dont want my boyfriend to & deep down i kno thats not fair from keeping him from having fun just because i cant , even though he'll let me . We have talked about over and over , dont tell me to talk to him about it because we have . TELL ME WHAT [ I ] can do , because he's done all he could . thanks (link)
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Wow.. I'm in the same boat as you. Me and my boyfriend are going to have our year and a half anniversary this week... and he's honestly the one I want to be with for awhile... and he feels the same way... but deep down I have the same fear you have.
I KNOW he won't do anything but all this fear stems from all of the insecurities I have.
If you've been made fun of, cheated on before, or ridiculed/condescended... these could all be factors in why you're feeling the way you do (I know that this is why I feel this way).
You don't probably feel as if you're good enough for him, but the truth is you are.
He wouldn't be with you if he didn't feel that way ya know? But I know its a tough struggle, to get over the feeling. You just have to tell yourself over and over again that you trust him. I mean hang out with him and his friends more... it helps if you know what kind of people he hangs around, even if they are girls.
but live in the present, and know that he's yours, and your his... and he cares about you otherwise he wouldn't be with you for such a long time.
and work on your insecurities, everybody has them but once you care more about yourself you'll learn to feel like you're able to be more independent and not always be worrying about whether somebody else is being faithful to you.
good luck
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okay so me and this guy have been dating for about 2 months and usually we dont fight.but like today in class he was being a total ass hole to me for no reason.and like he got his phone taken away and so he makes a comment saying "man my weekend is gna be fun because no one can interrupt me!"
i was like wtf?
thats pretty messed up!
what should i do? (link)
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I think you should just talk to him and straight out ask him: "why were you being such an ass to me in class that day?"
If he gets defensive or mean when you ask then just walk away and forget about it... I mean unless he's willing to communicate about it.
There's OBVIOUSLY something on his mind, therefore you should get to the bottom of it. Try to talk about it in person though, it's more effective that way... and that way he can't sign off or hang up in your face.
The truth is no relationship works without communication, and if you want your relationship with him to work out it's best to tell him how you feel.
good luck.
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im 15.f. i have this friend thatt is not close friend but we do trust each other alot...but were not like realli long time known friend we met this year..and became reali good friends.. she has a b.f and and his name is (D) so then this guy named (D) was talkign to me andhe goe simgoing to break up with my g.f tomorrow..and when i found out that (D) is the same guy my friend is dating i was in shock ..i called right away after talking to him and told her everything she stared crying and said shell call me back and i was liek ok...
but now they broke up ad me and him are talking and he keeps asking me to goona date and like what ever and it old him shes my realli good friend and that i cant do tat to her and he goes wil wait an dimlike will wait a long time...and he oes like not long long but enough time..and now i dont no what to do....and please dont say tell her abot it and ask heror something like that because that not the possibilitu i have right now..yea i do liek him and ye ai like my friend to but it wwasnt beacuse of me they broke up ....
so please i dont no what to do......help!!!
i will rate u thanx =) (link)
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I agree with ModernDay...You don't want to date someone like that. I was in the same exact situation as you. (which I'll just explain to you because I think it'll help you come to a decision)
My friend who I met freshman year and became really good friends began dating one of my guy friends who I cared about a lot at the time. The truth is though he broke up with her, and then wanted to date me.
Me and her started talking and shes like he asked you out didn't he? (I didn't want to tell her because I didn't want to hurt her)... but I said yes... and shes like I figured he would... but me and her talked and she said she wanted us to date. I was confused but she kept insisting that we date...
so eventually me and him dated.
and he broke up with me for her about 3 times.
and he cheated on me with other girls too..
it took me awhile to actually break up with him for good because I thought I "loved" him and whatever...and we broke up for good and now I don't talk to him anymore.
But my point is he was one of my best friends... and I lost him forever because he betrayed me. I also lost my friend from freshman year... because instead of talking to me about it first she went behind my back with him...
So what I'm asking you is... is this really worth losing your friend over? If she cared about him a lot than the odds are she won't take it very well.
He also won't treat you right, trust me... if he gets bored of girls that easily what makes you think you'll be any different. IF he did it before, he'll do it again to you. So why would you want to be with someone like that?
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