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March 1, 2005Answers:
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i'm 18. i live in boulder, colorado. i may be young, but i know more than my years say i do. ask me anything and i'll do my best to help.
advice
I wasn't sure what to put this under.. My bestest guy friend told me the other day that he liked me since the day he saw me... I don't know if I could see him that way cuz he is like my best friend and i dont want to hurt our friendship.. All I see him as is a friend... but I dont want to hurt his feelings or make him mad... could someone give me some advice on what i should do?? Thanks in advance!
well, if he's liked you this long without it hurting anything, just tell him that you don't see him as more than a good friend. he may be mad or disappionted, but he'll get over that. whatever you do, dont fake any feeling for him, that will just make matters worse than what they could be. just be honest.
Sometimes I don't know who I am anymore. For the most part ive become a really sophisticated, goody good with really STRONG morals. I always do homework and go to church. I never -- cheat, steal, drink, cuss, smoke, do drugs, ditch school, party, sneak out, have sex, listen to rap, etc. But sometimes i get sick of being like that. Sometimes i just want to bust out my old dirty, rap collection and live life a little. But then later the goody/serious side of me DESPISES rap because its so degrading and disgusting. The thing is.. it's not about rap music. (That was just an example of how im like two different people within hours or days.) I really dont think i have a split personality or anything to that extreme. I just dont know who I am anymore. One part of me wants to stay moral, and the other part of me wants to break free and live. How do I find out who i truely am when both of these WAY DIFFERENT personalities keep showing?
whoa-ho. well, isn't this a great question. i say, let your wild side roam free. if you cant live life now, when can you? as i like to say: if not now, when? you dont have multiple personalities, just two side to the same one. he reason the wilder side is showing up is because you are wanting to start knowing the world outside the little box youve built around your mind. in the words of Pink Floyd: TEAR DOWN THE WALL! and as for the whole being straight-edge thing, thats got nothing to do with rebelion or what-not. well, at least it shouldnt be about that. if u want to do drugs, do them. BUT!!!! be responsible about it. use them as an extention of ur already heavy set faith. use them as a mind expantion into the deeper truths of your faith, whatever faith that may be. as for the finding out who you really are, only you can find that out. and only you can tell when you are ready to find yourself. when that time comes, do what feels right in your heart to help that journey.
15/F--I like this guy, and its the first time I've liked a guy mostly based on his personality and having looks coming second. I'm not a shallow person but when I usally like guys I'm attracted to them physically. But he is a great guy and he has told me before that I was pretty, and that I was a great person all around. I decided to finally do something about wanting to be more than friends, and a friend of mine is going to talk to him tomorrow. I'm happy that he will find out, but also kinda scared because I feel that there might be no chance. When he compliements me, he says it when I feel down about my looks and everything so I feel that its just his way of trying to make me happy. So when he asks me about me liking him, online (we go to different schools) I am going to be at a loss for words. I want to say everything is true, but on the other hand I want to run and hide. I am just so insecure about myself and what he will think of me, its making me crazy. I'm not really asking for specific advice, just comments and words of enncouragment. What should I tell him when he asks me about it? Thanks and I'll rate you a 5 no matter what!
first, dont ever do the "thru-another-friend" type of finding out if he likes you. just tell him ya like him. and do it yourself. as for his compliments, he may give them all the time and you just dont notice unless you're feeling down. this is quite common. just be yourself and dont try to be someone other than yourself just to be with him. if he doesnt like you for you, he's not worth your time as a boyfriend. one of my favorite quotes will be my last advice for this evening: No man is worth your tears, and if he is, he won't make you cry.
Lately I cant constritate on my school work. My grades are slipping and I hate all my teachers. One teacher really hates me and never wants to help me. My parents think I`m doing super super great and if I get a lower then a B on my report card I would get in trouble. I`m having other problems right now and school is just my last thing to worry about. We are having a huge test Thursday and if we fail this we fail the grade. By the way I`m 13/f. I need to do really good on this test and what is the best way to constratrate on studying and doing good on this test? Thanks!
classical music. listen to beethovan and motzart while studying and you will remember more. also, on the day of the test, do your best to be positive about it. worrying about it will only cause test anxiety. as for your teachers, the ones that dont hate you, let them know that your haveing problems focusing due to outside issues. most of the time, they are wiling to help with the class part. and as for the teachers that hate you, suck it up, and do the best you can. those teacher love signs of weakness, if you dont give them any, thay cant do anything to you. best of luck.
Im not yet either but Im scareed I will become. Earlier this night i tried to make myself throw up. Im 14 5'1 and wiegh about 103. Most people think Im crazy because I think Im fatter than most people, but I do. How can I overcome this feeling, and actions. I know that if i become either it will be very hard to stop. please! I need help very bad! Im not afraid to admit it. so please if you read this, answer my question! please!
♥ scared
First off, this feeling is normal for 14 year-old girls. its all part of puberty. i am an 18 year-old male and i have a slight anorexia problem. im 5' 10" and weigh 135 lbs. im not telling you this to demean ur problem, im simply saying it to let you know that even guys have this problem, even if they are 18. In the U.S. its hard not to feel fatter than everyone else when our role models are so incredibly unhealthy thin. My advice, talk to a school councilor or intervention specialist and let them know that you've been haveing these thoughts. Also, ingore America's insane facination with being paper thin to be pretty. its just flat out not true. if your problem consists, seek professional help imediately. anorexia/bulimia is very hard to stop once its starts and should never be taken lightly. you made a good choice in asking for help before you fell into that trap.
ok my mom's b/f's son (lets call him chip) hooked me and his friend (call him dip) up but now chip found out that me and dip want 2 makeout friday and hes telling a bunch of ppl so now dip isnt sure if he wants 2 go out b/c also chip's dad threatned to kill dip if he tried 2 do anything with me.. i like dip and dip likes me should i try 2 end our relationship or try to talk chip into not beliving we are gonna makeout soon?
tell chip to shut his big yapper and tell dip that maybe you should wait awhile to move any further in this relationship. if dip agrees to that, hes in it for more that physical reasons, if he doesnt, he never really liked you in the first place. as for chip, hes like extended family, almost a brother, just smack the kid if he doesnt stop.
Okay, so i went out with this guy a i really really like him and stuff but when we went out we never saw eachother (diff schools) he acted like he didn't really wanna talk to me, we didnt talk on the phone or anything, and yeah it was weird so i dumped him. We have been friends for a while and when we arent going out we go to movies and stuff n talk on the phone all the time and yeah. I really like him, but i dont want to go out with him unless things can change...but i dont really know what to do. hes always like "i wish you would go out with me" and that he really likes me and stuff. But now hes mad about it and he told me he might just go out with this other girl because it doesn't matter and i was like crying (it was over the internet) because i still really like him! and i guess it seemed like he was trying to make me mad by saying stuff about the other girl or whatever but yeah i dont know what to do..should i go out with him again? or just forget him? or what??
My advice on this (being that kind of man) is to just tell him how you feel. After that, explain how your relationship didn't work and what would HAVE to change for it to work again. As for the talking about other girls, my best guess would be jealosy tactics. If that is the case, he really does like you and he doesnt know how else to express it. remember, guys were taught as children to supress all emotions except anger.